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| Coffee Lounge Talk amongst other community members. |
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Dec 29, 03
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The Battle of the Sexes Rages On
How many men does it take to open a beer?
None. It should be opened by the time she brings it. ---------------------------------------- Why is a Laundromat a really bad place to pick up a woman? Because a woman who can't even afford a washing machine will probably never be able to support you. ---------------------------------------- Why do women have smaller feet than men? It's one of those "evolutionary things" that allows them to stand closer to the kitchen sink. ---------------------------------------- How do you know when a woman is about to say something smart? When she starts her sentence with "A man once told me..." ---------------------------------------- How do you! fix a woman's watch? You don't. There is a clock on the oven. --------------------------------------- Why do men break wind more than women? Because women can't shut up long enough to build up the required pressure. ---------------------------------------- If your dog is barking at the back door and your wife is yelling at the front door, who do you let in first? The dog, of course. He'll shut up once you let him in. ---------------------------------------- What's worse than a Male Chauvinist Pig? A woman who won't do what she's told. -------------------------------------- I married Miss Right. I just didn't know her first name was "Always." ---------------------------------------- I haven't spoken to my wife for 18 months: I don't like to interrupt her. --------------------------------------- Scientists have discovered a food that diminishes a woman's sex drive by 90%. It's called a Wedding Cake. ---------------------------------------- Marriage is a 3-ring circus: Engagement Ring, Wedding Ring, Suffering. ---------------------------------------- Our last fight was my fault: My wife asked me "What's on the TV?" I said, "Dust!" ---------------------------------------- In the beginning, God created the earth and rested. Then God created Man and rested. Then God created Woman. Since then,! neither God nor Man has rested. ------------------------------------------ Why do men die before their wives? They want to. ---------------------------------------- A beggar walked up to a well-dressed woman shopping on Rodeo Drive and said, "I haven't eaten anything for days." She looked at him and said, "God, I wish I had your willpower." ---------------------------------------- Young Son: "Is it true, Dad, I heard that in some parts of Africa a man doesn't know his wife until he marries her?" Dad: That happens in every country, son. ---------------------------------------- A man inserted an advertisement in the classified: "Wife Wanted." The next day he received a hundred letters. They all said the same thing: "You can have mine." ---------------------------------------- The most effective way to remember your wife's birthday is to forget it once. ---------------------------------------- Women will never be equal to men until they can walk down the street with a bald head and a beer gut, and still think they are beautiful. 
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Dec 29, 03
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Why do women get periods?
Because they deserve them. What's the difference between a woman and a rock? You can't rape a rock. Whats the difference between a woman and a washing machine? After you drop a load in a washing machine it doesnt follow you around for the next 9 months . Why did the woman cross the road? The question really is "What the fuck is she doing out of the kitchen?" What's strong enough for a man, but made for a woman? The back of my hand. What is a woman? That piece of flesh around the Vagina. What do you call the first woman president of the united states? Cunt. How many feminists does it take to change a lightbulb? None. Feminism never changed anything. Why do women wear make-up and perfume? Because they're ugly and they stink. Why did Helen Keller masturbate with one hand? So she could scream with the other. Wanna hear a joke? Women's Rights. What do battered women do after their self defense classes? The dishes, if they know what’s good for them. What do you do after raping a deaf, dumb and blind girl? Break her fingers so she can't tell her parents . What do 20,000 battered women every year have in common? They don't fucking listen. What do you do to a woman with two black eyes? Nothing you already warned her twice. All these horrible jokes and more courtesy of teamacademy.com This war is over.
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Dec 29, 03
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I love sexist jokes so much. gotta be carefull who you tell them to though
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Dec 29, 03
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haha..harshcore! :c-tard:
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