Top 12 Reasons Gays Shouldn't Marry

Hot Karl · #1 (**permalink**) Feb 19, 04

1. Homosexuality is not natural, much like eyeglasses, polyester, and viagra.

2. Heterosexual marriages are valid because they produce children. Infertile couples and old people can't legally get married because the world needs more children.

3. Obviously, gay parents will raise gay children, since straight parents only raise straight children.

4. Straight marriage will be less meaningful if Gay marriage is allowed, since Britney Spears' 55-hour just-for-fun marriage was meaningful.

5. Heterosexual marriage has been around a long time and hasn't changed at all; women are property, blacks can't marry whites, and divorce is illegal.

6. Gay marriage should be decided by people, not the courts, because the majority-elected legislatures, not courts, have historically protected the rights of the minorities.

7. Gay marriage is not supported by religion. In a theocracy like ours, the values of one religion are imposed on the entire country. That's why we have only one religion in America.

8. Gay marriage will encourage people to be gay, in the same way that hanging around tall people will make you tall.

9. Legalizing gay marriage will open the door to all kinds of crazy behavior. People may even wish to marry their pets because a dog has legal standing and can sign a marriage contract.

10. Children can never succeed without a male and a female role model at home. That's why single parents are forbidden to raise children.

11. Gay marriage will change the foundation of society. Heterosexual marriage has been around for a long time, and we could never adapt to new social norms because we haven't adapted to things like cars or longer lifespan.

12. Civil unions, providing most of the same benefits as marriage with a different name are better, because a "separate but equal" institution is always constitutional. Separate schools for African-Americans worked just as well as separate marriages for gays and lesbians will.

e_BoY · #2 (**permalink**) Feb 19, 04

disagree with some of them but lets see what sammy skillz has to say

matéo · #3 (**permalink**) Feb 19, 04

BAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA TO THAT GUY^^^^^^^^^^^^^

CoSmIc-RaVeR · #4 (**permalink**) Feb 19, 04

i disagree with most of it.....and im gay so i should know thanx....HOT KARL....u don't know shyt about "gay" anything....y would u post something so stupid! who cares.....if someone wants to get married to someone of the same sex then mind ur own buisness....nobody asked u to look...are u gay or sumthin? a real, nice, intelligent STRAIGHT man that girls love wouldn't say anything ;) get wut i mean....trust me girls think its a turn off for straight men to talk about negative "facts" about gay ppl and families....i think i can impress and get more bootay frum chix than u can :moon:

crookedking · #5 (**permalink**) Feb 19, 04

i whole heartedly agree with all of them.

especially the one that says that gay marriages will create gay children. straight parents don't have gay children.

Crazy_Cat_Lady · #6 (**permalink**) Feb 19, 04

"Gay marriage will encourage people to be gay, in the same way that hanging around tall people will make you tall."

if that was true i would be over 6 feet tall

e_BoY · #7 (**permalink**) Feb 19, 04

Quote:

Originally posted by crookedking:
i whole heartedly agree with all of them.

especially the one that says that gay marriages will create gay children. straight parents don't have gay children.

this can all be proved by asking sammy skillz. I dont know any homosexual people but i do know he is. If he does come apon this thread i would like to ask if his parents are straight or not. Why the hell wont straight parents have gay children? And just cause your parents are not straight doesnt mean their children will end up being homosexual either.

Mr.Dave · #8 (**permalink**) Feb 19, 04

HEY GUYS! LOOK UP!

WHAT'S THAT FLYING OVER YOUR HEADS????

Holy shit.

prozac · #9 (**permalink**) Feb 19, 04

sarcasm, kids, sarcasm.

Rhianna · #10 (**permalink**) Feb 19, 04

Quote:

Originally posted by CoSmIc-RaVeR
i disagree with most of it.....and im gay so i should know thanx....HOT KARL....u don't know shyt about "gay" anything....y would u post something so stupid! who cares.....if someone wants to get married to someone of the same sex then mind ur own buisness....nobody asked u to look...are u gay or sumthin? a real, nice, intelligent STRAIGHT man that girls love wouldn't say anything ;) get wut i mean....trust me girls think its a turn off for straight men to talk about negative "facts" about gay ppl and families....i think i can impress and get more bootay frum chix than u can :moon:

Are you really mad about it? Because, well I may be crazy here but I think it's just a joke.

Anyway, I agree w/ it all. Gay people always have gay kids. It's just like being around gay people too long makes you gay. I hear E makes you gay too.

Ryan Ross · #11 (**permalink**) Feb 19, 04

Quote:

Originally posted by Mr.Dave
HEY GUYS! LOOK UP!

WHAT'S THAT FLYING OVER YOUR HEADS????

Holy shit.

Its a bird! Its a plane, its THE FUCKING POINT!

Man some people!

Ryan Ross · #12 (**permalink**) Feb 19, 04

Quote:

Originally posted by Rhianna
I hear E makes you gay too.

So does being around people who wear womens clothes (even if they are women), carrots, pigs wearing pink, being 10 ft from a purse, and people who enjoy dancing (yeah thats you! raver!watch out! dont get any on you!)

Rhianna · #13 (**permalink**) Feb 19, 04

Oh no, it's too late for ravers. We're ALL gay!

Ryan Ross · #14 (**permalink**) Feb 19, 04

Quote:

Originally posted by e_BoY
disagree with some of them but lets see what sammy skillz has to say

I'd like to know which ones you do agree with

(last quote i promise!)

crookedking · #15 (**permalink**) Feb 19, 04

Quote:

Originally posted by e_BoY

this can all be proved by asking sammy skillz. I dont know any homosexual people but i do know he is. If he does come apon this thread i would like to ask if his parents are straight or not. Why the hell wont straight parents have gay children? And just cause your parents are not straight doesnt mean their children will end up being homosexual either.

it's a proven fact buddy. read about it.

jim · #16 (**permalink**) Feb 19, 04

hey e_boy, good luck with that GED, you're going to need it.

Belms · #17 (**permalink**) Feb 19, 04

lol. Cry me a river. Ooooo wait till my gay friend reads this he's going to prove u wrong. Shut the fuck up. If he was being serious about this which i doubt he is what can u do. A forum is to vent ur thoughts and feelings. Doesnt mean u have to whine about not liking it. :finger: haha.

lildonkey · #18 (**permalink**) Feb 19, 04

lets ask sammy skills, the village fag..... ahahah e_boy i love you.... not in a sammy skills kind of love.... just a your funny and cool kind of love..

Chet · #19 (**permalink**) Feb 19, 04

I heard you can catch Gay
thats why I wear may Sars mask at Raves

you can never be too careful

Rhianna · #20 (**permalink**) Feb 20, 04

I think Sammy is smart enough to not take any of this seriously. And don't you guys know? Sammy's not gay, he's just going through a "phase". He used to be super straight but then he started to rave.

NeVeRLooKBacK · #21 (**permalink**) Feb 20, 04

hahaha
that has to be the funniest thing ever!

say_whut · #22 (**permalink**) Feb 20, 04

LMFAO!

c'mon kids, grab a clue. i know sarcasm is hard to interpret online but come on!

e_boy: you crack me up. and i'm wonderin the same thing that blunted asked, which ones do you agree with?

karl: way to stir shit up.

Taddy_Bare · #23 (**permalink**) Feb 20, 04

D'uh I wonder why this is in the Crack-Me-Up-Mofo! section? :284: Is he being sarcastic? My gawd, what a concept!
*shakes head*

Mercedes · #24 (**permalink**) Feb 20, 04

^^

ehehehe.. *shakes head with you*

NeVeRLooKBacK · #25 (**permalink**) Feb 20, 04

I think you guys should just give your head a shake