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Aug 27, 04
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Ordering pizza in the year 2008
> This would be funny if it wasn't almost true to the direction we are
> taking. > > > Ordering Pizza in 2008 > > > Operator: "Thank you for calling Pizza Hut. May I have your national ID > number?" > > > Customer: "Hi, I'd like to place an order." > > > Operator: "I must have your NIDN first, sir?" > > > Customer: "My National ID Number, yeah, hold on, eh, it's > 6102049998-45-54610." > > > Operator: "Thank you, Mr. Sheehan. I see you live at 1742 Meadowland Drive, > and the phone number's 494-2366. Your office number over at Lincoln > Insurance is 745-2302 and your cell number's 266-2566. Email address is > sheehan@ home.net Which number are you calling from, sir?" > > > Customer: "Huh? I'm at home. Where d'ya get all this information?" > > > Opera tor: "We're wired into the HSS, sir." > > > Customer: "The HSS, what is that?" > > > Operator: "We're wired into the Homeland Security System, sir. This will > add only 15 seconds to your ordering time" > > > Customer: (Sighs) "Oh, well, I'd like to order a couple of your All-Meat > Special pizzas." > > > Operator: "I don't think that's a good idea, sir." > > > Customer: "Whaddya mean?" > > > Operator: "Sir, your medical records and commode sensors indicate that > you've got very high blood pressure and extremely high cholesterol. Your > National Health Care provider won't allow such an unhealthy choice." > > > Customer: "What?!?! What do you recommend, then?" > > > Operator: "You might try our low-fat Soybean Pizza. I'm sure you'll like > it." > > > Customer: "What makes you think I'd like something like that?" > > > Operator: "Well, you checked out 'Gourmet Soybean Recipes' from your local > library last week, sir. That's why I made the suggestion." > > > Customer: "All right, all right. Give me two family-sized ones, then." > > > Operator: "That should be plenty for you, your wife and your four kids,and > your 2 dogs can finish the crusts, sir. Your total is $49.99." > > > Customer: "Lemme give you my credit card number." > > > Operator: "I'm sorry sir, but I'm afraid you'll have to pay in cash. Your > credit card balance is over its limit." > > > Customer: "I'll run over to the ATM and get some cash before your driver > gets here." > > > Operator: "That won't work either, sir. Your checking account's overdrawn > also." > > > Customer: "Never mind! Just send the pizzas. I'll have the cas h ready. How > long will it take?" > > > Operator: "We're running a little behind, sir. It'll be about 45 > minutes,sir. If you're in a hurry you might want to pick 'em up while > you're out getting the cash, but then, carrying pizzas on a motorcycle can > be a little awkward." > > > Customer: "Wait! How do you know I ride a scooter?" > > > Operator: "It says here you're in arrears on your car payments, so your car > > > got repo'ed. But your Harley's paid for and you just filled the tank > yesterday" > > > Customer: Well I'll be a "@#%/$@&?#!" > > > Operator: "I'd advise watching your language, sir. You've already got a > July 4, 2006 conviction for cussing out a cop and another one I see here on > September for contempt at your hearing for cussing at a judge." "Oh yes I > see here that you just got out from a 90 day st ay in the State Correctional > Facility. Is this your first pizza since your return to society? > > > Customer: (Speechless) > > > Operator: "Will there be anything else, sir?" > > > Customer: "Yes, I have a coupon for a free 2 liter of Coke". > > > Operator: "I'm sorry sir, but our ad's exclusionary clause prevents us from offering free soda to diabetics. The New Constitution prohibits this. > > > Thank you for calling Pizza Hut!" 
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Aug 27, 04
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^^^^^^^^^bahahahahahaha
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Aug 27, 04
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hahah wow... thats some crazy talk!
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Aug 27, 04
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Aug 27, 04
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Aug 27, 04
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When you call in, it can sense your phone number and before the operator even picks up the call, your entire file is already open on there screen. The screen is typically coded with a color, green, yellow and red or some sort of color combo each meaning something different. They can also see your average income based on your last credit check, debts, etc... and then try to upsell you on different plans that would work better for you. CRM systems are also used heavily in banks and even 5-star hotel chains.
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Aug 27, 04
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crm system isnt the same as a antional identity number which you need to have in ored to buy shit. crm's are fuckin dope from a sales point of view.
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Aug 27, 04
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Aug 27, 04
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lol..
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Aug 27, 04
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fuck this noise! i'm gonna go hide in my cave under a rock! fuck see ya all later
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Aug 27, 04
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OMFG! hahaha I would of yelled at the guy, " I just want my damn pizza, now make it!"
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