Depression and advice. (take a look, it's spiffy)

[Spaceman Spiff]

This is a little conversation myself and Leopard Gurl had not too long ago. it's neat.


LG: ya I was just having a blah day... I get them every now and then since I stopped taking my anti depressants

SS: I get blah days every day. life is generally stupid
plus I havent had a decent nights sleep in 2 weeks, provided waht I get can actually be considered sleep....

LG: hmmm I C... well don't get too down on yourself hun... I know things right now are hard but they're hard for a lot of us... you just haveta look at the positive side of life. That's what I'm always forced to do... just think of all the people who care for you and how upset and lost they'd feel if you weren't around. I've been through a lot of shit and should rightfully be one of the most bitter and unloving people in the world but being that kind of person accomplishs nothing... it only suceeds in making you feel worse... so smile and take what life gives you one day at a time and with a lil chagrin and soon one day everything will be so much better

SS: dont you ever wish that people knew how to take their own advice? I see depressed people and try to give them some advice or hope to try and pull themselve outta the funk that their in, but then I look back at my own situation and think "why cant I take this advice?" and I realize, hmmm... maybe a lil advice doesnt help people as much as I think...

LG: because people genrally don't take advice... they think they can solve all their problems by themsleves... but really they can't. When you're depressed nothing matters... no one cares... and it's only up to you to get yoursel;f out of that funk. It's sadly the way people work.

SS: it's not that no one cares, it's that people keep dwelling on the past, that friends cant change what has happened, that it's not the people who dont care, it's the person.

LG: exactly... I'm saying that's the attitude of the person... what they think

SS: mmm hmm,.
In theory, if this was 6 months ago or before, I probbably would have tossed myself off a bridge right now. but I've grown since then and can handle my own problems.
mind you, the way I handle them is not the way I should, but it still works, sorta.

I need a decent nights sleep.
thats not going to happen untill I sort through all this.

LG: ya... just stay at a friends for a while... go camping... just get the fuck outta dodge and deal with your probnlems on your own... take a notebook and write to your hearts content. It may start out as nothing but it always turns into something

SS: I've done all that already.
and ya know what?
my mind keeps going back.
bloody women.

LG: well if you care about her so much tell her that

SS: oh she knows.
but she's a little psycho...
and personally, I dun wanna have to deal with her for a while.

LG: ahh I C.. well that's your decision... you need to sort yourself out first though hun... get a job and concentrate on you

SS: I'm werkin on it.
got an interview on monday

LG: YAY good luck hun!

[cerah]

Well it's kinda true... I dunno... just another one of those rambling ICQ thoughts from lil ol Sawah eh?

[Spaceman Spiff]

ack.....my brain was working harsh overtime yesterday......that makes my brain hurt now....

ouch.....

[stabmyhead]

good stuff. yes i read it all...dunno how to reply but i guess i'll give my 2 bits on my thoughts for depression.

depression. the further you sink, the harder it is to rise. a lot like walking in a circle for a long time, that you look up and realize you've dug a hole so deep you cant get out... sometimes you just stop walking... and you just sit there... try to climb up... but rocks and dust keep getting in your eyes..... and you can't see... you slip and fall and you dont know what to do.. so you start walking again.. hoping hey, maybe if i walk enough.. i'll get to the other side... so you do it again.. sometimes others help you out by shining a flashlight to show you the way up. to tell you, hey. its not so far down. but you have to be the one in the end to climb out of it...

like garbage, you gotta take it out as soon as it comes. leaving it out for too long and it'll start to stink. so take it out. can't just put it aside, leave it there too long and the stench will stay with you for a long time. put it under the carpet, on the roof, on your yard. no. no no... might attract pests to you, that try to go through your garbage.... just take out the fuckin' trash.

you dont or cant take your own advice because its what you give to others. i dunno about you. but i hate to recycle things.. like i am not one of those ppl that gives the same advice to everyone they talk to. (ha. lee. kinda like teena in "i feel sick" you'll get what i'm saying when you read it :P)

anyways... i'm out. btw. good luck. and as for sleep.. BAHHUM.

[Spaceman Spiff]

*brain cleard...*
whoa....