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May 03, 07
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But do guys really get that much of a kick paying for us? Or do you usually find the sex way better on the nights you do? 
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May 03, 07
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The man I'm dating likes to pay for almost everything. We've talked about it and he has straight up said it's a cultural thing. If I protest enough he'll let me grab the bill for a small dinner or something...but he's the type to hand me a $20 when I'm standing in line at the bar like it's the obvious thing.
To be honest, I like the feeling of being taken care of, especially in public. Maybe that's shallow or old fashioned, but I like that he's always chivalrous when we're out. I get lots of other opportunities to contribute, like bringing wine or a bottle of his favorite whiskey over to his house, or cooking fancy dinners at home, buying little gifts, etc...
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May 05, 07
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When a guy asks out a girl, he is planning on trying to impress her as much as possible. Otherwise there would be a lot of dates at mcdonalds.
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May 24, 07
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Depends on how hot the girl is.
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May 25, 07
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Tim tries to pay for EVERYTHING. It definitely took some getting used to, but it's nice to be with a man who feels like he is taking care of me. I've never had this experience before - in all of my past relationships my bfs were usually broke or cheap, so I RARELY got treated. A few years I even paid for my own birthday dinner! It's not like I expect him to pay all the time, it's just nice that he offers - or insists :P I pick up clothes for him from my store on a pretty regular basis, and I always send him little gifts in the mail! I think it all evens out in the end :)
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May 25, 07
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Jun 14, 07
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i feel the exact same way.
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Jun 16, 07
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I have never dated before but my opion on it is that it should be the guy paying, because if a girl ask a guy out then I would say the guy better run!
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Jun 17, 07
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I've always been a very independant woman, never relied on any man to 'take care of me' and I can't stand materialistic girls however I've dated a few guys who have just been straight up cheap.
Maybe it's a cultural thing but i've been raised to always insist to pay for things and if i'm offered something I always refuse it - it's like this reverse gesture that is really common in the Iranian community. But it's twisted and it always ends up screwing me over in the end because the guy ends up getting used to me paying all the time and just ends up taking advantage of that. Perhaps I should stop insisting but I can't help but feel awkward if the relationship isn't entirely mutual. But at the same time I love chivalry and I love when a guy does insist to pick up the bill more often than not. I think after my last relationship though i'm just going to stop insisting because I felt like I was just being toyed around. My parents have also both sat me down and told me to stop insisting when it comes to guys because it doesn't work like that in Vancouver.
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Jun 17, 07
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I think it's got a lot more to do with how these little things are foreshadowing of what might come in the relationship. I generally pay for dates and whenever I feel generous - heck, not even girls always - but I don't like it when I smell the ones that are trying to 'work me'. It is also mildly annoying when a girl goes to the point of getting mad if she doesn't pay [and Shadi, in no way is it an overstepping of a girl's independence] especially on the first few dates.
I do have to agree with most of the guide and I do acknowledge two things as being very important - as the relationship progresses there should be some thought given to the financial status of one of the two [or more, depends how you swing in your relationships] If it's entirely unbalanced than it has to be spoken about and some solution worked. I also agree that 'impressing' doesn't need dinner and a movie. I find that a bit cliche and while I enjoy cuisine and a good flick, first dates are a lot about getting to know the other person a bit below the surface. Let's face it, most of the initial contact is physical - but that's not enough. If I ask a girl out [heck, after coffee maybe we'll grab a bite] it's because I want to know her better too - mind over matter, as they say. She has to impress me too a bit - by being independent, well spoken, passionate about something. If she doesn't get it and thinks coffee's too cheap for her fine-ass, she's already struck out. Depends on my mood, though, maybe I'll get a weird idea like just walking around chatting important non-sense. Maybe I'll do the dinner thing. I would try to guess what the most comfortable setting with be for us to have a chat. I do things in reverse - start up slow, get better and better. As for that very Neanderthal approach to men as the providers [which, unfortunately, does seem to be quite strongly hardwired into our cultures if not our genetic makeup] I have nothing to say. I'm not interested. Love - affection or infatuation or whatever your designation might be - has little to do with how much money you spend on someone.
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Jul 18, 07
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as for the post..... i hate being taken out on dates. it uncomfortable and trying to figure out who pays sucks ass. i always offer money, or say i have non b4 we go(im blunt tho) i like going on dates after i know the person a bit and its become comfortable:) so we can decide who will pay this time sort of thing. or make one another a nice dinner etc. i like simple dates like going for a picnic in the summer months to the beach for dinner and watching the sunset etc...cheesy i know, but simple and cheap..u bring the wine ill bring the chicken lol(casual). as for the winter months well ur sort of screwed....lol indoor dates always cost cash i guess im a summer girl:love: i like dating ppl i can kick it with so the rule book is out the effin window. all the so called "RULES" are too confusing.
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Jul 19, 07
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"FUCK THE RULES!" - Rocky Horror response
Guys pay because if we don't we look cheap. And girls can say all they want about "Oh, I really don't care" - they do. If a guy skimps out on the bill or goes dutch and you ain't living with him, you're not gonna consider living with him. And I don't really blame it on girls being materialistic. It's more of a security thing than anything. It almost comes to an evolutionary standpoint - When a girl gets pregnant, she damn well better have something to fall back on, and a guy with a job is probably the most convenient. Especially if he helps out with the parenting. Especially if he actually is the parent. Because ultimately the responsibility of the child is going to lay on the woman... While a lot of girls may consciously think and claim that they don't ascribe to this, they do anyways simply because that's human nature. For every meal a chick pays for, the guy's gotta pay for 3. Otherwise he's "unstable".
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Jul 19, 07
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Sep 09, 07
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So, picking out some key phrases it can be summarized in this way:
When the bill comes, offer to help cover part of it or pay the tip, unless you find a way pay for one of the activities on your date. Moreover it would show him you’re not looking for a sugar daddy so, be sure to have your wallet on hand. Me: However, when it comes to going out someone a first time, I go on a "meet" first and not a date. If I like her, I'll ask her out for a second meet (date) and will pay for the dinner then. :)
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