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Oct 17, 04
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A Huge turn in my life.
It took me about half a year outta the house to realize how much of a family guy I am....
I love my family... despite all their faults and failures. I love them and would do anything for them. I wish I could be rich.... so I could make my Grandma ever so happy before she passes away.... I would give her everything .... I know she has already done the same for me I miss her. I want her to be with my Grandpa in Edmonton when she moves on. I believe that everybody has a variety of paths to choose... Hell life is full of choices... But why is it... I make so many wrong ones... personal... professional... spiritual... There are a few things I wish in life.... I can tell you with the purest of hearts... All my wishes are based on other people's happiness. I've learned a lot in the past year.... I've taken a lot of things for granted. My dad has always said something to me that I truly believe... friends will come and go... but family is family. We are built on love. No matter how thin it is... there will always be love. .... never acknowledged that quote until lately..my father... i've portrayed him to be a monster... *sigh*.... he just loves us. I wonder how he is doing right now.... Proboby feeling.... like he has nothing to live for anymore... I need to make him proud.... It's awkward for the two of us to share emotions with one another. We've never really had a typical father-son relationship, Never bonded at all. Never talked about anything personal. Never went on any father son trip. I always thought that he was a bad father for not respecting my boundaries for hitting me. but, bad or not.... I know he tried. I know he loved me. I know he raised me to the best of his ability for 18 years... with love I want to give him a hug the next time I see him. To show him how much I love him and to apologize for the times i've let him down and brought our family down. I hope... I can do this next week when I see him. afterall. he apologized to me for failing as a father... and as much as i wanted to hear it for so long. It was one of the most painful moments in my life. Last edited by Anjew; Oct 17, 04 at 04:55 AM. 
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Oct 17, 04
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Quote:
I had the same sort of relationship with my old man. I thought the old codger was the biggest prick out there, but when I was 18, moved out, I really had a different image of my parents. For me, it was the realization that they were just normal people, like me, who were doing the best that they could. I'm 24 now, and my relationship with my Dad gets better all the time - and so it will with your Dad - at least I hope. We have a very traditional English family - reserved and conservative - so I have a hard time dealing with expressing how much I think the old man rocks. Actions speak louder than words. All a father wants is for his son to be happy. All a son wants is to make his father proud. Those wants aren't mutually exclusive.
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Oct 17, 04
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Be thankful that you are starting to understand and clue in.
Some people go an entire lifetime without realizing any one of the points you mentioned above.
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Oct 17, 04
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thats really good to heir man i live on my own no roommates no nothing and i wish i had a family to go to my family is fucked but all teh best wishes to u
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Oct 18, 04
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Sometimes it's these people that don't realize what they had until it's gone. So as annoying as parents or family can sometimes be, they are family.
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Oct 18, 04
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...and many realize these things when it is too late. Good post Anjew.
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Oct 18, 04
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I've never been close to my dad at all, and it shows sometimes.
He was always putting work first rather then spending time with all of us. We have never really had anything in common, ha d alot of good times in life, but he never really taught me anything except to keep my head up, and life is like a rollercoaster, lots of ups and downs, its all how you control them. Im more closer with my mom since she understands me more then my dad does. My dad wanted me to be who he wasnt when he was a kid, and thats not what I wanted to be or do. My mom knows what I want, and she can relate to me. She has given more advice then anyone else has ever given me, and I thank her for that. She has done a lot for our family, and none of us have actually taken the time to think about that, and we have all taken it for granted, espically me of course. Im thinking of doing something for her, thanks anjew for the inspiration and to change up my perspective.
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