Anyone who lives at home or isn't exactly sure what their doing in life.

[cinist]

i'm lucky because i think my parents are just happy that i'm alive and healthy.
Strange thing about my parents is that they have always discouraged me from getting a job or from moving out. Though i ran away at 17 to nyc for 3 months and then spent a year in n.van. I think a lot of people move out just because they want to have that independance. They work shitty jobs and barely scrape by each month, which is ok when you are young but do you really want to have to struggle when you're older? i see a lot of my friends paying rent by working for minimum wage or just over, how do you get ahead doing this? the rent they're paying could go towards buying a place in the future.

if i were you kenji, id think about what it is i wanted to do. you are a smart, caring, good looking individual and there is a great deal you can do with your life. turn your dad's negative attention into something positive have him help you with whatever it is you decide to do. no rush or pressure but why not look into things. i think the scariest thing is the thought of being poor and stuck in a job you hate when you're too old to do anything about it.

[Lil Jenna]

Originally Posted by cinist

i'm lucky because i think my parents are just happy that i'm alive and healthy.
Strange thing about my parents is that they have always discouraged me from getting a job or from moving out. Though i ran away at 17 to nyc for 3 months and then spent a year in n.van. I think a lot of people move out just because they want to have that independance. They work shitty jobs and barely scrape by each month, which is ok when you are young but do you really want to have to struggle when you're older? i see a lot of my friends paying rent by working for minimum wage or just over, how do you get ahead doing this? the rent they're paying could go towards buying a place in the future.

if i were you kenji, id think about what it is i wanted to do. you are a smart, caring, good looking individual and there is a great deal you can do with your life. turn your dad's negative attention into something positive have him help you with whatever it is you decide to do. no rush or pressure but why not look into things. i think the scariest thing is the thought of being poor and stuck in a job you hate when you're too old to do anything about it.

Exactly. I know people who are in their 40's and are unhappy because they are stuck in this situation... I couldnt have said it better.


I really hope you find your path Kenji :)

Sorry I cant give better advice... this flu i have is killing me

[BrownThug]

in the same boat kenj
theyre jsut owrried that you wotn do anyhtign with your life

[galaxie]

I can see it from both sides, to be honest.

There was a point in my life a couple of years ago when I wasn't sure exactly what I wanted to do in the future. The reason my mom supported me working full-time instead of going to school was the simple fact that my job had something to do with my future career. I've always wanted a career in fashion and working in retail management meant that I was making connections and learning about the industry. Same thing goes for when I was working wholesale - I made tons of industry contacts and learned about a different side of the apparel industry. Now that I've finally decided exactly what I want to do, I'm in school p/t online so I can get my degree while working full-time. Bottom line is she's always supported me because she knew my choices would benefit me in the long run.

Now, let's flip over to my brother.
Not only does he have a shitty job (he pumps gas), but he pisses away all of his money on drinking and getting stoned, and can't even pay my mom for his cell bill or car insurance. He isn't doing ANYTHING to figure out his life, rather he chooses to party all night and sleep all day. My mom has a HUGE problem with him right now, and doesn't like the fact that he's living at home rent-free and treating it like a hotel. I totally agree with her because he's being stupid. I'm always encouraging him to apply for new jobs that MAY lead to a possible career (ie...get a job at home depot, it's the same pay as he makes now but he might find he really likes working with lumber so he should go into construction or whatever), but he never listens. It's sooooo incredibly frustrating because he is SO intelligent but chooses to do nothing to figure out his life.

Kenji, maybe this is how your parents feel but don't know how to explain it to you?

[decypher]

I'm finally just getting direction over the last year, now i need to focus more. Parents will be like that because they always feel that whatever you do is going to fail because of this or that. Talk about motivational speakers. Just put it in the back of your mind and work towards moving out. Once your out you'll have many more ideas of where you want to go in life.

[Kandyapple]

I still live at home for many reasons. Money being the biggest one. Also I don't really know what i'm doing with my life currently. I tried to get into a job that I thought would further me in an industry that I'm interested in. Since I didn't know what I was working towards in college. So at least I'm working full time and paying the bills. My mom is fine with it because I pay my way> But she is still a bit of a safety net since she is the one I give the money too. So if I'm broke she just lets me pay her back. The other thing is that we get cheap rent because we are in subsidised housing. So if I didn't live with her she would have to move. Because you have to have a child to live in our complex. She is still trying to get back to work after a coupld hard knocks so it works out for both of us. I don't have to scrape by, and can save money to travel (which is important to me right now) And she doesn't have to pay a high rent on her own.

But I must admit I have been looking to move out. But right now I'm nervous beause I have a good thing. And I worry about crappy roommates, or cheep crapy appartments. Or just scraping by with my income. And also if my mom will be ok. I need her to get back to work before I will totaly feel comfortable leaving. She is chipping away at her inheritance right now. And I think she is in a bit of a rutt. So I'm on the fence about moving out.

[ebbomega]

I still have no clue what I want to do with my life.

"Direction" and "plans" are not necessarily the same thing.