MORBID HUMOR MANIA TAKES OVER FnK

rawb · #1 (**permalink**) Mar 20, 07

PHEW, HOW IS EVERYONE? GOOD? GOOD?

*UNHOOKS MIC, PACES*

HOW WAS EVERYONES DAY? GOOD? GOOD?

MINE WAS BAD. I JUST MURDERED A STRANGER I MET OFF OF CRAIGSLIST WITH A FAKE 'FREE PUPPIES' AD. I SUPRISED HIM WITH A BOX FULL OF MOROCCAN JUMPING SCORPIONS, AND THEN FINISHED HIM OFF REPEATED BLOWS TO THE ABDOMEN WITH A RUBBER MALLET.

...AND BOY ARE MY ARMS TIRED, AND MY SHIRT IS SO DIRTY. I HATE BLEEDERS. ANYBODY WITH ME? WAKKA WAKKA?

**sNyx** · #2 (**permalink**) Mar 20, 07

I hid myself in a chocolate fudge birthday cake and FedEx shipped it to the Olson twins where I burst out of it with my SuperSoaker AquaPack Devastator packed full of lard and shot it down her penny sized cake holes ballooning them up from toothpicks to full on Tori Spellings.

rawb · #3 (**permalink**) Mar 20, 07

SO YEAH, LOTS OF YOUNG PEOPLE HERE? EH? GOOD? GOOD?

ANYWAYS, ANYONE TAKE THE AN SAT TEST? MAN THOSE ARE HARD. I MEAN, ALL THOSE QUESTIONS THAT ARE WRITTEN DOWN MADE ME WANT TO KILL THOSE EGGHEADS THAT WRITE THAT SHIT. SO I DID. WITH A STEEL TOOLBOX THAT I WIELDED LIKE A CLUB. NOT SO SMART NOW YOU DEAD MOTHERFUCKERS. AND I STILL GOT A 830 AND TIRED-AS-FUCK ARMS.

THAT'S WHAT WE CALL A CALLBACK FOLKS. TIP YOUR WAITRESS.

wishbone · #4 (**permalink**) Mar 20, 07

THE TEST IS NOT THAT HARD JUST THE TIME CONSTRAINT MAKES IT HARD

**sNyx** · #5 (**permalink**) Mar 20, 07

I managed to track down the little shit who was banging on my door every morning at like 6-in-the-fuckin-AM. Caught him biking down the street the other day, so I popped out from behind a car and jammed a 6 foot pull vault between the spokes of his front trie. I proceeded to pickup his baby cryin' raspberry face off the underside of the pavement and clipped all his finger nails real, reaaaalll short. Then I kicked over lil' Jane's lemon aid stand and forced him to pickup each and every quarter cut lemon peice. Later on the whole neiboughood found out I started getting all these weird stares and for some fuckn' reason I don't get the newspaper anymore. Now I gotta find that kid.

SEAN! · #6 (**permalink**) Mar 20, 07

Quote:

Originally Posted by rawb

SO YEAH, LOTS OF YOUNG PEOPLE HERE? EH? GOOD? GOOD?

ANYWAYS, ANYONE TAKE THE AN SAT TEST? MAN THOSE ARE HARD. I MEAN, ALL THOSE QUESTIONS THAT ARE WRITTEN DOWN MADE ME WANT TO KILL THOSE EGGHEADS THAT WRITE THAT SHIT. SO I DID. WITH A STEEL TOOLBOX THAT I WIELDED LIKE A CLUB. NOT SO SMART NOW YOU DEAD MOTHERFUCKERS. AND I STILL GOT A 830 AND TIRED-AS-FUCK ARMS.

THAT'S WHAT WE CALL A CALLBACK FOLKS. TIP YOUR WAITRESS.

man, you is dumb