ok am i being a wierdo?

prozac · #1 (**permalink**) Apr 21, 03

My 14-year-old brother left himself signed in on MSN and one of his friends started talking to me.

"Kalyim says:
i took 10 asprins and 3 white pills"

so at first i was being a bitch like "oh, yeah, you're cool, popping pills at 14 you wanna end up on east hastings?" but we ended up really talking....he cuts himself, which i used to and he's similar to me as a kid in a lot of ways....I've been talking to him for an hour, listening to his feelings, telling him my scariest drug stories (he says he's only smoked weed so I'm trying to scare him a little cus he was acting like drugs were cool)....I've been trying to be understanding, talking about how i used to cut too and the things that helped me stop....

Am I just being creepy, trying to help this kid....am I doing any good?

This whole thing is so wierd I don't know if what I'm doing is right....but I wish I'd been able to talk to someone who'd been through it when i was going through it....

comments? advice? now? help?

meth0dical · #2 (**permalink**) Apr 21, 03

i commend you for being able to open up to someone you might not know too well, and for trying to help him

meth0dical · #3 (**permalink**) Apr 21, 03

then again if you think its really serious, you should talk to someone else that can help him better

prozac · #4 (**permalink**) Apr 21, 03

well he's got therapists coming out his ass and he's on zoloft

so it's not like his parents don't know or anything

but i know how he feels about that shit...it all seems so useless...people asking you shitty questions, old people thinking they can help you, etc.........that's why i'm trying to talk to him

"Kalyim says:
i dont know anyone else who has been through wut i am going through"

benyamean · #5 (**permalink**) Apr 21, 03

If you think you can help him then I think you should do so, it's better for him being at a young age hearing it from a younger person (especially an friend's older sibling). It's a good thing...

~lazee_grrl~ · #6 (**permalink**) Apr 21, 03

i don't think your being a weirdo..ur just trying to help..there is nothing weird about it..~

prozac · #7 (**permalink**) Apr 21, 03

well..........we've talked a lot now.......we're on to music and stuff so I'm like "whew". I shared a lot of really dificult stories with him and gave him lots of sugestions and my phone number in case he ever wants to talk....he's actually a pretty neat kid.

cinist · #8 (**permalink**) Apr 21, 03

keep talking to him, just being there for him to talk to will be helping him a lot. i'd keep in contact with him, you would be amazed how much an older friend can mean to a kid.
Also tho, if he is your brothers friend and the first thing he said wuz about pills, maybe your brother needs sum1 to talk to aswell? because they have obviously talked to each other about this stuff and maybe your brother is having a rpoblem right now? 14-15 is a fucked up age of depression and confusion. it seems most people get set on one path or the other at that age.

prozac · #9 (**permalink**) Apr 21, 03

yeah, i thought of that...i was really fucked up at his age so i kind of expected my brother to be, too...

I think he actually has too much of a sense of humour to really be like that though, it's hard to explain...he finds the humour in everything. I'm pretty sure he's not suicidal....as far as drugs, I'm not sure...he rolls his eyes and makes some crack like "I'm not like you" when i ask...

should i ask his friend?

prozac · #10 (**permalink**) Apr 21, 03

Good Game...Game 7, Tuesday says:
hey...question...
Kalyim says:
?
Good Game...Game 7, Tuesday says:
does my brother drink or smoke weed or anything? I wouldn't be mad annd i wouldn't tell him you told...I'm just curious
Good Game...Game 7, Tuesday says:
i was at his age...
Good Game...Game 7, Tuesday says:
but he won't tell me when i ask
Kalyim says:
lol nope he dont
Good Game...Game 7, Tuesday says:
seriously?
Kalyim says:
seriously
Kalyim says:
i told him i am gonna drug him one day
Kalyim says:
and now he wont accept food or drink from me
Kalyim says:
lol

prozac · #11 (**permalink**) Apr 21, 03

*whew*

>>lilPogo<< · #12 (**permalink**) Apr 21, 03

i dont think ur weird at all i think that its totally great how u opened up ur hard experiences ta help a total stranger
*huggles*

cinist · #13 (**permalink**) Apr 21, 03

lol prozac good undercover work

prozac · #14 (**permalink**) Apr 21, 03

ha ha ha

thanks.

say_whut · #15 (**permalink**) Apr 21, 03

i applaude your efforts to help this kid out. just keep talking with him so you can tell if he's improvong his life or taking a turn for the worse.

but i don't know how much trust he'll have in you if he were to stumble upon this thread. there's no reason for you to share with all of us whut he's shared with you.

anyhow, good on you for trying to help this guy out. you obviously know the importance of having someone that understands to talk with.
but keep whut he says between the two of you, or at least keep it off FnK.

MistressSpankME · #16 (**permalink**) Apr 21, 03

That's not creepy hun, it may be the age or the fact he's your bro's friends that wierds you out about talking to him about things you are, but he NEEDS someone that has been through the same thing as him. As you said before, parents and therapists sometimes et to the point of pissing you off when you are going through something like that (trust me I know... too many dumb fucking questions, medications etc), I think its great that you are talking to him, and you should let him know that you are there for him if he ever needs to talk again. Your brother doesn't even have to know if you both think that's best.

I guess this situation isn't as serious, but I helped a 14 yr old friend of my sisters through coming out. I'm not gay and haven't dealt with having to decide whether to tell my parents or friends, and which ones can i trust etc etc. But I was there for him nonetheless and that alone helped him. I still talk to him every once in a while about hawt boys haha. None of his friends were gay/bi at the time, so I helped him because like half of mine are haha, and either way I was just someone for him to talk to and not worry about being judged or ridiculed.

*Ass* · #17 (**permalink**) Apr 21, 03

that is so big of you to talk to this guy.....really says alot about you, nice one and its not weird i used to work as a counsellor its good to help those that want to talk

Jingles · #18 (**permalink**) Apr 22, 03

you may not be a registered therapist - but sometimes all a person needs is to know someone cares who isn't a parents and who isn't apid to. So many changes happen at 15 and 16, it is a struggle to find oneself - yet most of the time you have no idea you are in that struggle, you think you know everything already. The nice thing about MSn is that your real and you're not at the same time - it's easier to say things over the net then if you sat down with him on a couch somewhere.
When i lived at home I often found my brothers MSn signed in and found myself chatting with his friends - I nevered worried much about him, he's gota good head and is much less curious about drugs then I was.
ust realize that something like cutting is often more then a surface probelem that can be fixed with casual conversation - if you continue talking to this young man you risk getting immesley frustrated when he does things after saying he wants to stop and so on - but being the person a kid can reach out to - there's nothing creepy in that
and remember some people have to make mistakes in order to learn from them - we can warn alll we want but sometimes they actually have to do it themselves

Jingles