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  #1 (permalink)  
Old Jan 28, 04
Gravity Slave
 
Join Date: Apr 2001
MC Hammered has a spectacular aura aboutMC Hammered has a spectacular aura about
Subject: Top 8 morons

1. WILL THE REAL DUMMY PLEASE STAND UP? AT&T fired President John Walter after nine months, saying he lacked intellectualleadership. He received a $26 million severance package. Perhaps it's not Walter who's lacking intelligence.

2. WITH A LITTLE HELP FROM OUR FRIENDS: Police in Oakland, California spent two hours attempting to subdue a gunman who had barricaded himself inside his home. After firing ten tear gas canisters, officers discovered that the man was standing beside them in the police line, shouting, "Please come out and give yourself up."

3. WHAT WAS PLAN B??? An Illinois man, pretending to have a gun, kidnapped a motorist and forced him to drive to two different automated teller machines, wherein the kidnapper proceeded to withdraw money from his own bank accounts.

4. THE GETAWAY! A man walked into a Topeka, Kansas, Kwik Stop, and asked for all the money in the cash drawer. Apparently, the take was too small, so he tied up the store clerk and worked the counter himself for three hours until police showed up and grabbed him.

5. DID I SAY THAT??? Police in Los Angeles had good luck with a robbery suspect who just couldn't control himself during a lineup. When detectives asked each man in the lineup to repeat the words: "Give me all your money or I'll shoot," the man shouted, "That's not what I said!"

6. ARE WE COMMUNICATING?? A man spoke frantically into the phone, "My wife is pregnant and her contractions are only two minutes apart!" "Is this her first child?" the doctor asked. "No!" the man shouted, "This is her husband!"

7. NOT THE SHARPEST TOOL IN THE SHED!! In Modesto, California, BETTUM was arrested for trying to hold up a Bank of America branch without a weapon. King used a thumb and finger to simulate a gun, but unfortunately, he failed to keep his hand in his pocket. (hellllllooooooo!)

8. THE GRAND FINALE (I LOVE THIS ONE!!!) Last summer, down on Lake Isabella, located in the high desert, an hour east of Bakersfield, California, some folks, new to boating, were having a problem. No matter how hard they tried, they couldn't get their brand new 22 ft. boat going. It was very sluggish in almost every maneuver, no matter how much power was applied. After about an hour of trying to make it go, they putted to a nearby marina, thinking someone there could tell them what was wrong.

A thorough topside check revealed everything in perfect working condition. The engine ran fine, the out drive went up and down, and the prop was the correct size and pitch. So, one of the marina guys jumped in the water to check underneath. He came up choking on water, he was laughing so hard.

NOW REMEMBER... THIS IS TRUE . Under the boat, still strapped securely in place, was the trailer.
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  #2 (permalink)  
Old Jan 28, 04
Get in!
 
Join Date: Jul 2002
Jrock is an unknown quantity at this point
Surprize.. they're almost all American!

Good job guys! Keep it up

-jay :209:
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  #3 (permalink)  
Old Jan 28, 04
Kandyapple's Avatar
Registered User
 
Join Date: Jan 2003
Kandyapple is a jewel in the roughKandyapple is a jewel in the roughKandyapple is a jewel in the roughKandyapple is a jewel in the rough
LOL the boat one is funny. I was thinking that they forgot to take up the anchor or something. hahahaha
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  #4 (permalink)  
Old Jan 28, 04
Registered User
 
Join Date: Sep 2002
cinist is a jewel in the roughcinist is a jewel in the roughcinist is a jewel in the roughcinist is a jewel in the roughcinist is a jewel in the rough
haha thats great
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  #5 (permalink)  
Old Jan 28, 04
Grapes's Avatar
ceiling cat!
 
Join Date: Nov 2002
Grapes is a name known to allGrapes is a name known to allGrapes is a name known to allGrapes is a name known to allGrapes is a name known to allGrapes is a name known to allGrapes is a name known to allGrapes is a name known to allGrapes is a name known to allGrapes is a name known to all
Quote:
NOW REMEMBER... THIS IS TRUE
The surest sign that internet fluff is bullshit is when it's preceded by something like this.
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  #6 (permalink)  
Old Jan 29, 04
ShAkE iT
 
Join Date: Jan 2004
Lil Tiff is an unknown quantity at this point
oh man some people are dumb!
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  #7 (permalink)  
Old Jan 29, 04
$orry $ack @ $hit
 
Join Date: Aug 2003
Ggabe81 is an unknown quantity at this point
Quote:
Originally posted by Jrock
Surprize.. they're almost all American!

Good job guys! Keep it up

-jay :209:

Ha Ha Ha Very funny, All Americans hah? Ya know im an american and im not a dummy, well i guess i am, just for that thought of me joining the military. But then if i didnt then i would of never met my wife. Hmmmm,,,, Contradictory huh???
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  #8 (permalink)  
Old Jan 29, 04
Barstar.
 
Join Date: Jan 2003
e_BoY is an unknown quantity at this point
no just americans are dumb
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  #9 (permalink)  
Old Jan 29, 04
prangin' out
 
Join Date: May 2001
zarlon will become famous soon enoughzarlon will become famous soon enough
Ah the stupidity

makes me feel brilliant
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  #10 (permalink)  
Old Jan 29, 04
$orry $ack @ $hit
 
Join Date: Aug 2003
Ggabe81 is an unknown quantity at this point
^^^^^
So what is my out come am i dumb cause im an american, or am i not cause im me.
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  #11 (permalink)  
Old Jan 29, 04
Revolution Productions
 
Join Date: Sep 2003
-DLO_604- is an unknown quantity at this point
winston you are the man hahaha
that just made my night lol
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  #12 (permalink)  
Old Jan 29, 04
Registered User
 
Join Date: Oct 2003
Dean is an unknown quantity at this point
hahahah thats hillarious... i love this one

4. THE GETAWAY! A man walked into a Topeka, Kansas, Kwik Stop, and asked for all the money in the cash drawer. Apparently, the take was too small, so he tied up the store clerk and worked the counter himself for three hours until police showed up and grabbed him.
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  #13 (permalink)  
Old Jan 29, 04
Never trust a Brunette
 
Join Date: Apr 2003
Mc*Phee is an unknown quantity at this point
bbahahaha, those were great.
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  #14 (permalink)  
Old Jan 30, 04
sNyx.com
 
Join Date: Nov 2000
sNyx is just really nicesNyx is just really nicesNyx is just really nicesNyx is just really nicesNyx is just really nicesNyx is just really nicesNyx is just really nice
A+ posting winston..
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  #15 (permalink)  
Old Jan 30, 04
fanfuckintabulous
 
Join Date: Apr 2003
kAyB is an unknown quantity at this point
hehe too funi
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  #16 (permalink)  
Old Jan 31, 04
runnin thru the streets
 
Join Date: Nov 2003
Mr.Wrong is an unknown quantity at this point
hahahahahhahahahhahaha
some people are dumb
#2 is great
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