Trust your DOG - watch your CAT

DJDeeb · #1 (**permalink**) Jun 01, 04

EXCERPTS FROM A DOG'S DAILY DIARY:

8:00 a.m.Oh, boy! Dog food! My favorite!
9:30 a.m.Oh, boy! A car ride! My favorite!
9:40 a.m.Oh, boy! A walk! My favorite!
10:30 a.m.Oh, boy! Getting rubbed and petted! My favorite!
11:30 a.m.Oh, boy! Dog food! My favorite!
Noon- Oh, boy! The kids! My favorite!
1:00 p.m.Oh, boy! The yard! My favorite!
4:00 p.m.Oh, boy! To the park! My favorite!
5:00 p.m.Oh, boy! Dog food! My favorite!
5:30 p.m.Oh, boy! Pretty Mums! My favorite!
6:00 p.m.Oh, boy! Playing ball! My favorite!
6:30 p.m.Oh, boy! Watching TV with my master! My favorite!
8:30 p.m Oh, boy! Sleeping in master's bed! My favorite!

EXCERPTS FROM A CAT'S DAILY DIARY:

Day 183 of My Captivity: My captors continue to taunt me with bizarre little dangling objects. They dine lavishly on fresh meat, while I am forced to eat dry cereal. The only thing that keeps me going is the hope of escape, and the mild satisfaction I get from ruining the occasional piece of furniture. Tomorrow I may eat another house plant. Today my attempt to kill my captors by weaving around their feet while they were walking almost succeeded; must try this at the top of the stairs. In an attempt to disgust and repulse these vile oppressors, I once again induced myself to vomit on their favorite chair, must try this on their bed. Decapitated a mouse and brought them the headless body, in an attempt to make them aware of what I am capable of, and to try to strike fear into their hearts. They only cooed and condescended about what a good little cat I was. Hmmm, not working according to plan. There was some sort of gathering of their accomplices. I was placed in solitary confinement throughout the event. However, I could hear the noise and smell the food. More importantly, I overheard that my confinement was due to my power of "allergies." Must learn what this is and how to use it to my advantage. I am convinced the other captives are flunkies and maybe snitches. The dog is routinely released and seems more than happy to return. He is obviously a half-wit. The bird, on the other hand, has got to be an informant, he speaks with them regularly. I am certain he reports my every move. Due to his current placement in the high metal room, his safety is assured. But I can wait, it is only a matter of time ....

Puddin

Jen-E-03 · #2 (**permalink**) Jun 01, 04

I knew it, my cats are trying to kill me! When its dark they always hangout around the stairs and get in the way makin me trip or stumble when walkin up or down em... and the vomit they left in my room....I even found one of em sleeping on my pillowtryuing to infest it with it's dander.

PHOTONIC · #3 (**permalink**) Jun 01, 04

haha cute... for reason this just reminds me of garfield n odie

Sykonee · #4 (**permalink**) Jun 01, 04

Ah, then this makes more sense!

Gotta love the feline race. ;)

Jen-E-03 · #5 (**permalink**) Jun 01, 04

^ LMAO @ that video clip!!!

ohhh I can't wait to see the Garfeild movie wooot!

brokencrayon · #6 (**permalink**) Jun 03, 04

haha I love cats. especially the fact that they probably are pretty evil.. they remind me of stewie from family guy!

Jen-E-03 · #7 (**permalink**) Jun 03, 04

cats are evil the make my allergies go nutz...I own 2 and i swear they are always conspiring against me.

~god~ · #8 (**permalink**) Jun 03, 04

dogs rule.
I'd give the dog 12 caps of e... and watch him bone the cat.

**MC Hammered** · #9 (**permalink**) Jun 03, 04

This is why they invented this option:

http://www3.telus.net/wyeung/fk/cat.mpeg

~god~ · #10 (**permalink**) Jun 03, 04

^ Haaaaaaaaaaaaahhhhhhhhhhhhhhaaaaaaaaaaaa ahhhhhhhhhhaaaaaaaaa!!!!!!!!1

crackdragon · #11 (**permalink**) Jun 03, 04

hahahaha... I would give good give you good karma for that movie but its says I cant

~god~ · #12 (**permalink**) Jun 03, 04

^ says the same thing for me...

mystique · #13 (**permalink**) Jun 03, 04

I gave karma for all of us then ;)

**MC Hammered** · #14 (**permalink**) Jun 03, 04

Thank you very much. :)

*bows*

crackdragon · #15 (**permalink**) Jun 03, 04

Quote:

Originally Posted by mystique

I gave karma for all of us then ;)

ty.. good karma was given for the karma giving :)

Sue Bitch · #16 (**permalink**) Jun 03, 04

all my cats do all day is sleep and then wake me up when i do.

and winston that is hillariouse but disturbing

DJDeeb · #17 (**permalink**) Jun 03, 04

Quote:

Originally Posted by Sykonee

Ah, then this makes more sense!

Gotta love the feline race. ;)

HAHA!....found the video where I saw that clip before.....funny stuff!!

www.h2oproductions.com\URLLinked\funny_cats.wmv

strawberr_E · #18 (**permalink**) Jun 05, 04

yeah i like both but dogs are definately my fave. they're dumb with a simple thought process. just like me!

brokencrayon · #19 (**permalink**) Jun 06, 04

Quote:

Originally Posted by DJDeeb

HAHA!....found the video where I saw that clip before.....funny stuff!!

www.h2oproductions.com\URLLinked\funny_cats.wmv

aww haha that is hilarious

SteveO13 · #20 (**permalink**) Jun 06, 04

Quote:

Originally Posted by DJDeeb

EXCERPTS FROM A DOG'S DAILY DIARY:

8:00 a.m.Oh, boy! Dog food! My favorite!
9:30 a.m.Oh, boy! A car ride! My favorite!
9:40 a.m.Oh, boy! A walk! My favorite!
10:30 a.m.Oh, boy! Getting rubbed and petted! My favorite!
11:30 a.m.Oh, boy! Dog food! My favorite!
Noon- Oh, boy! The kids! My favorite!
1:00 p.m.Oh, boy! The yard! My favorite!
4:00 p.m.Oh, boy! To the park! My favorite!
5:00 p.m.Oh, boy! Dog food! My favorite!
5:30 p.m.Oh, boy! Pretty Mums! My favorite!
6:00 p.m.Oh, boy! Playing ball! My favorite!
6:30 p.m.Oh, boy! Watching TV with my master! My favorite!
8:30 p.m Oh, boy! Sleeping in master's bed! My favorite!

EXCERPTS FROM A CAT'S DAILY DIARY:

Day 183 of My Captivity: My captors continue to taunt me with bizarre little dangling objects. They dine lavishly on fresh meat, while I am forced to eat dry cereal. The only thing that keeps me going is the hope of escape, and the mild satisfaction I get from ruining the occasional piece of furniture. Tomorrow I may eat another house plant. Today my attempt to kill my captors by weaving around their feet while they were walking almost succeeded; must try this at the top of the stairs. In an attempt to disgust and repulse these vile oppressors, I once again induced myself to vomit on their favorite chair, must try this on their bed. Decapitated a mouse and brought them the headless body, in an attempt to make them aware of what I am capable of, and to try to strike fear into their hearts. They only cooed and condescended about what a good little cat I was. Hmmm, not working according to plan. There was some sort of gathering of their accomplices. I was placed in solitary confinement throughout the event. However, I could hear the noise and smell the food. More importantly, I overheard that my confinement was due to my power of "allergies." Must learn what this is and how to use it to my advantage. I am convinced the other captives are flunkies and maybe snitches. The dog is routinely released and seems more than happy to return. He is obviously a half-wit. The bird, on the other hand, has got to be an informant, he speaks with them regularly. I am certain he reports my every move. Due to his current placement in the high metal room, his safety is assured. But I can wait, it is only a matter of time ....

Puddin

I fuckin luv it lol