the clock that turns

[sketchtechkid]

i havent writen a poem in a while so i am a bit rusty this is the latest one


The clock that turns is just too loud, the memories thought just scream and shout. A crystal city built on hell but it’s not ice so it won’t melt. I think all night till 2 am but then I sleep to think again. Do you understand, I think you do, thinking hurts why should you. What am I trying to prove by this, that young age is bitter and old is sweet. Whatever you say there capitan but don’t forget to suck you’re thumb

[sungoo]

No offense, but I hate reading poorly spaced poetry.
I mean, the way I see it, you were too lazy to space out your poetry.
So as a reader, I'm not even gonna bother reading it cause it's such a hassle to fix it in my head.
Not to mention spacing in poetry means SO much.
By the way, I only read the first line but to show what I mean, I'll take your own poem.

"The clock that turns is just too loud"

Now if you were to write it like...

"The clock

that turns

is just

too loud."

The entire poem's emphasis changes from one word to another. Even if you meant to wrote it in some kind of prose, some of the greatest prose writers, would never write in one continuing line. It just takes so much away from the poem itself.
Anyways, /end rant.

[sketchtechkid]

okey right