I'm dealing with a very serious, emotional, and personal issue right now. . .

tiedye · #1 (**permalink**) Apr 18, 07

I can't get this juice box open and there is appley goodness waiting inside. The straw broke. What should I do?

anewlife · #2 (**permalink**) Apr 18, 07

Is dying of thirst an option? Then do nothing.

LLaaUUrrYYn · #3 (**permalink**) Apr 18, 07

Lift up one of the side flaps. Cut off the end. Open/spread. ENJOY!

thechix0r · #4 (**permalink**) Apr 18, 07

Quote:

Originally Posted by LLaaUUrrYYn

Lift up one of the side flaps. Cut off the end. Open/spread. ENJOY!

My thoughts exactly

tiedye · #5 (**permalink**) Apr 18, 07

I ripped it open with my teeth and got it all over me. WHY DO THESE THINGS HAPPEN TO ME?

rawb · #6 (**permalink**) Apr 18, 07

HOW COULD THIS HAPPEN TO ME
I'VE MADE MY MISTAKES
GOT NOWHERE TO RUN
THE NIGHT GOES ON AS I’M FADING AWAY
I'M SICK OF THIS LIFE
I JUST WANNA SCREAM
HOW COULD THIS HAPPEN TO ME

tiedye · #7 (**permalink**) Apr 18, 07

I knew you'd understand rawb. What would you do if you couldn't get your juice box open?

I'm thinking about ending it all but the thought of that applicious nectar is keeping my head above water.

tiedye · #8 (**permalink**) Apr 18, 07

Applicious? I'M MAKING UP WORDS, I'M SO DISTRAUGHT!

hardstylin · #9 (**permalink**) Apr 18, 07

Quote:

Originally Posted by LLaaUUrrYYn

Open/spread. ENJOY!

OOHHH YAA.

Arrrika · #10 (**permalink**) Apr 18, 07

^^ It's funny that that comment is referring to a box:)

-evil-duerr- · #11 (**permalink**) Apr 18, 07

hahahhaha

awesome spoof of the classic phrenetic/firewire/nabs type threads...

guys, im so angry I could write not one, but two punching bag threads!!!!!!!

fuck that. 3 punching bag threads. with POLLS!!! and google images to suppliment my rage!!!!!!!!!!!!

Gusto · #12 (**permalink**) Apr 18, 07

have you tried smashing it open

ebbomega · #13 (**permalink**) Apr 18, 07

Have you tried turning it off an on again?

kAyB · #14 (**permalink**) Apr 19, 07

apple juice sounds good.. if that was me i woulda looked aorund the place for a different straw and if there was none put a hole thru the top and pour it into a glass :D

lildonkey · #15 (**permalink**) Apr 20, 07

You got caught in the safeway consumer commie filter! this is your punishment!

tiedye · #16 (**permalink**) Apr 20, 07

Juice box: Round 2. . . . best out of 5!

radha · #17 (**permalink**) Apr 20, 07

Scissors, anyone?

tiedye · #18 (**permalink**) Apr 20, 07

Don't confuse the problem with logic.

Guineveire · #19 (**permalink**) Apr 20, 07

man, just pokethe silver thinger with something and squeeze all the juices out of the box into your mouth

tiedye · #20 (**permalink**) Apr 20, 07

You guys just don't get it. THE JUICEBOX IS JUST ANOTHER METAPHOR IN MY LIFE FOR THE WAY THINGS REALLY ARE.

I can't even open it with my mind. What kind of man does that make me?

radha · #21 (**permalink**) Apr 20, 07

Once I had that problem: the straw was missing from a Tetrapak.

So I poked a hole in the aluminium covered hole with a fork.

Then I put my lips over the hole, and squeezed lightly.

tiedye · #22 (**permalink**) Apr 20, 07

You know... the symbolism of that act would just be another notch on the belt of failure of my soul.

radha · #23 (**permalink**) Apr 20, 07

Dude, we're giving you hints.

Have you lost all your tools to solve your mental challenges?

:nuts:

tiedye · #24 (**permalink**) Apr 20, 07

DON'T YOU GET IT MAN? I'm baring my soul here.

Guineveire · #25 (**permalink**) Apr 20, 07

There there..
will a little krama make it better? :P