too much stuff to do

[mugsy]

i thought the stress of graduating from college would be the sadness of missing everyone after.... fuck that.
this grad show is driving me nuts, whenever i turn around theres another project i have to do, or another $100 i have to spend. i havent even begun to study for my exams.
but my body is so fucking tired it wants to quit. i already made an impromptoo visit to the hospital for a little illness, and now its not getting better from the stress\lack of sleep. im resting, but the more i rest, the more behind i get, the more stressed i get. plus im the kinda person whose mind runs and runs when they are stressed, so it takes me awhile to fall asleep.
i want 4 more hours each day just for sleeping. i think my next sculpture will be a time machine.

[mugsy]

another thing - all three family members are sick - mom with pnemonia, dad with strepped throat, brother with a cold. and its fucking disgusting in my house.
everyone is coughing and sneezing everywhere, my brother leaves his disgusting snotty tissues everywhere, and no one is really bothering to have any consideration towards me and my not so grand immune system. im fucking graduating, please dont sleep in my bed when you have pnemonia. this is why we go the futon. im sick of giving up my bed room. "oh its ok, just go and sleep in there anyways." no. i dont want to get fucking sick.
i already am pretty sick, just not cold wise, i dont need a fucking other problem thanks.
its gross, im tired, and im tired of being the one to take care of everyone else. this is only two weeks, TWO WEEKS, that i need to dedicate to myself and myself only, but no. everytime i come home - even if its to go to the fucking hospital - i have to serve someone.
today i get home, im almost doubled over in pain from my back and tummy, thinking i could just relax. my dad always comes first right now, and i agree and comply. my brother is home. i figure hell have made dinner. nope. hes been on the phone to his lady allll fucking night. i aks him to make some coffee for dad to help his headache. nope. talking to his lady is much too important.
fucking lame-ooooooooooooooo.

[diesskei]

If it helps at all, I'm pretty sure pneumonia isn't contagious.

[bebu*funfun]

i have like 3 group projects and finished off one on monday and an essay on monday. im sooooooo stressed out, that im on my ass right now just pouting away. hatee group work. hate how it always takes one person to step up to organize shit and its always me and i end up taking up a lot of the work load. grr. can't wait for this semester to end. SO drained.

[mugsy]

^ holy shit yah.
in english everyone thought me and my friend were the slackers cause we were the "art students" so group project comes around, we do about 70 % of the work (theres two others in our group) we show up on presentation day, and one guy hasnt done any of his work. we edn up getting a shit ass mark.
group projects suuuuuck.
the only fun one we have had was in sculpture - we were given a day to make an installation piece on campus, and we critiqued in the afternoon.

[bebu*funfun]

we've been flooded by them because yes in the "real world" as designers we will be doin tons of collabo stuff. we had our first fight the other day.. it was crazy seeing a group fight and argue with each other during a critique. group projects can get scary. SOOOOOOOO much work and some things u really can't split up to work on. i have a group project to make a flash website.. so hard to distribute the work, so i sucked it up and doin all the illustrations for it. oh well.

so megs..whats after this for you?

[mugsy]

^ i dont even know really.
well thats a lie. i dont really see myself persuing graphics - i am graphically inclined, but im a painter at heart, and i think if i did art all day at work, i wouldnt have the emotional or physically strength to fully persue my passion at home.
im gonna take some time off to do some serious thinking about this, travel, move out, so some growing up. i also plan on getting my ECE (early childhoood education) and teach some preschool.
i kinda feel like the education i have now is enough for a couple of years of work, plus before i get my BFA i want to have an outrageous portfolio, one that i spend a year planning and making. one that shows growth.
but now i have strong feelings about the IDEA program... ahhhh. i donno. everyone else in the program is freakin out right now. most of them are older and dont have time to take off, so they're all mostly heading to NASCAD or concordia or OCAD.
my brother is heading most likely to glasco,scotland to finish up his masters. maybe ill do a little schooling there? i dont know. i totally need some time off to figure things out.
where are you headed after the carr\where does communications lead you? my friend bens' girlfriend was in the program, and shes studying over in glascow right now on the exchange thing. her name is sinaz. you know her?

[bebu*funfun]

i think everyone need some breathing time after a lot of stressful schooling. especially in the arts field its SO open that you have just numerous of choices to choose from. definately explore your options and go with whatever you have the most fun doing.

well ive always been good at packaging/building/idenity stuff.. i duno just something i enjoy a lot and tend to be good at. so i want to keep following that and possibly get into an ad firm when im out and start career asap. thats all if i have a good enough portfolio or not. this program has offered me stuff i never imagined id learn.. starting to do a lot of video stuff (which i hate).. but i guess its good to know.. have a full class on interactivity where i learn how graphic design can be interacted by the public (web base).. i duno..this first year in comm design covers a bit of all forms of communication forms and we start narrowing in 3rd/4th year. i can see myself pushing towards the illustration/marketing/idenity/packaging area. i love my program.. just SOOOO stressful. 80% of the people who go to the school counciller at my school are from comm. design. (kinda scary).

i have other weird dreams as well.. i wanna do fashion design/fashion marketing/broadcasting/marketing as well.

yea.. and just the past 2 months ive been questioning my choice of comm design.. found out im really rad at building/inventing things. more of an industrial design mind, but whatever. i rather be multi talented.

again..CONGRATS. seriously think about the IDEA program, its really well known. i applied when i got out of highschool and got rejected..had such a crap ass portfolio. the competition is crazy, but so worth it when u get in.