"This job'd be great without all the @#$%ing customers..."

[Phrenetic]

Originally Posted by Mangle

(Note: I didn’t even work at this place. I was just looking at the games with my dad but I figured I’d help this lady out.)
Customer: “Hi, my son wants a Star Wars game. How much will that be?”
Me: “Well, there are lots of Star Wars games, because some are older than others. The older ones are more likely to be cheaper… sometimes the console changes the price as well.”
Customer: “Console?”
Me: “The thing you play it on.”
Customer: “Oh he’s got a Gamestation.”
Me: “Do you mean a Playstation or a Gamecube?”
Customer: “I don’t know, it’s black.”
Me: “Is it cube shaped?”
Customer: “No.”
Me: “Right so, it’s a Playstation 2. Did your son say which type of Star Wars game he wanted, or even the name?”
Customer: “No he just said Star Wars. A shooting one, I think.”
Me: “Most of them are shooting games…”
Customer: “Well, this is the one with the laser guns in it and the laser swords.”
Me: *cringing* “Laser guns and laser swords are what Star Wars is famous for.”
(My dad, who is behind me, starts laughing.)
Customer: “I’m not some Star Wars computer genius you know! This is only the 21st century. I don’t even know why you work here if you don’t know what I should buy!”
Me: “I don’t actually work here.”
------------------------------------
Oh, well, that poor woman. She just didn't do any research before she went to the store. What's wrong with that?

This is why i refuse to work with the public

[ebbomega]

Originally Posted by Mangle

I'm back, but in many ways, I never left.

STILL NOT MAKING SENSE.

[Mangle]

Originally Posted by ebbomega

STILL NOT MAKING SENSE.

Well, I am a Talking Heads fan. They said Stop Making Sense. Dare you question David Byrne?

[ebbomega]

Same as it ever was.

[Mangle]

Same As It Never Was

[ebbomega]

This ain't no party.
This ain't no disco.
This ain't no foolin' around.

This ain't no mod club
Or CBGB's
I ain't got time for that now.

[Mangle]

(this is in a kosher deli, in Iowa.)
Customer: “Can I get a ham sandwich, please?”
Me: “Well, sir, we don’t serve ham.”
Customer: “No ham? What do you have then?”
Me: “Well, we have turkey, roast beef, corned beef, and pastrami…”
Customer: “But no ham?”
Me: “No, sir, no ham.”
Customer: “What? Do you have a thing against ham or something?”
Me: “Actually…yes, we do.”

[ebbomega]

^ That was good.

Customer: Mary, Mother of God! I cut my hand on a rubber band! Do you sell Band Aids?
Randal: Band Aids is a brand name. The proper term is adhesive strips.
Dante: The man is bleeding to death and you're getting into a semantics argument?
Randal: Man, name brand word association is one of the more subtle threats to this nation's free trade. It gives the larger, well-known companies an unfair advantage. I'm doing my part to keep the playing field level by weaning people off referring to generic products with brand names.
Dante: Way to show some backbone.
Randal: No spine of Jell-O here, my friend.
Customer: So do you sell adhesive strips or what?
Randal: No.

[NinjaBoy]

Working at home depot for a year gave me an abundance of terrible customer service stories.

I look down an aisle and see a customer smashing a piece of drywall with a hammer. I approach him, as he hides the hammer. I ask if he needs any help, he informed me that he wanted a discount because it was damaged.

__________

A customer demanded that I give him these fence panels because the top was coming loose (the nail had been pryed out). I walked up, grabbed a nail, nailed it back in. "Full price".

__________

This is the worst, and most people think I'm lying.

A customer complained that his hot water heater was way too loud in his basement and he wanted to build a wall around it to dampen the noise. Kind of odd, but it wasn't that crazy.

I took him aside, showed him how to frame it, put in the drywall blah blah blah. I grabbed a door to show him how to put that in. He informed me that he wouldn't need it. When I asked why:

"Because I don't need to get in there, I just want it to be quiet"

Fair enough, but I explained that hot water heaters, need to be replaced/serviced fairly often.

"Nope, this one has been running great for years."

I told him that if he's had it for a while, it will give out pretty soon. I was very adamant that not having a door was a very very bad idea. He told me I didn't know anything (even though I had just spent a half hour teaching him everything he knew...

I shit you not, several months later, the same guy came in. Another associate brought him over, "This guy wants to know the best way to take down a wall, can you help him?"

[ebbomega]

Imagine if he put out the pilot light... oh god he'd be so fucked.

[Mangle]

Originally Posted by NinjaBoy

A customer complained that his hot water heater was way too loud in his basement and he wanted to build a wall around it to dampen the noise. Kind of odd, but it wasn't that crazy.

I took him aside, showed him how to frame it, put in the drywall blah blah blah. I grabbed a door to show him how to put that in. He informed me that he wouldn't need it. When I asked why:

"Because I don't need to get in there, I just want it to be quiet"

Fair enough, but I explained that hot water heaters, need to be replaced/serviced fairly often.

"Nope, this one has been running great for years."

I told him that if he's had it for a while, it will give out pretty soon. I was very adamant that not having a door was a very very bad idea. He told me I didn't know anything (even though I had just spent a half hour teaching him everything he knew...

I shit you not, several months later, the same guy came in. Another associate brought him over, "This guy wants to know the best way to take down a wall, can you help him?"

That's gold.

[prozac]

I went through this little interchange about 5 times a day when I worked at a cellphone dealership:

customer: Can I pay my cellphone bill here?

me: Yes, but only with cash (I always made sure to emphasize this key word)

customer: Ok great....[hands me a visa]

me: I'm sorry sir, we can only take bill payments in cash at this location.

customer: How about debit?

me, trying not to sound like a sarcastic bitch: No, I'm afraid that we can only accept bill payments in CASH here.

aggggh. over and over, all day long!