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  #26 (permalink)  
Old Jul 21, 05
ebbomega's Avatar
1up motherfucker
 
Join Date: Oct 2003
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Preacher: I've heard that every time I touch myself I make baby Jesus cry.

Is that true?
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  #27 (permalink)  
Old Jul 21, 05
like a kick in your side
 
Join Date: Feb 2004
sidekick will become famous soon enough
only because it makes him jealous.
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  #28 (permalink)  
Old Jul 21, 05
ebbomega's Avatar
1up motherfucker
 
Join Date: Oct 2003
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God's love may be eternal, but my left palm's love is immediate....
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  #29 (permalink)  
Old Aug 14, 05
AshleY*DawN
 
Join Date: Jun 2004
IntakE is an unknown quantity at this point
hahaha wow this thread makes me laugh!
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  #30 (permalink)  
Old Aug 15, 05
Jesus Loves You
 
Join Date: Jul 2005
The Preacher is an unknown quantity at this point
I am glad that I was, in some way, able to bring you joy, IntakE.
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  #31 (permalink)  
Old Aug 15, 05
Stony B's Avatar
Suspended
 
Join Date: May 2004
Stony B has a little shameless behaviour in the past
Quote:
Originally Posted by The Preacher
I love being filled with Him.
GROSS
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  #32 (permalink)  
Old Aug 15, 05
Jesus Loves You
 
Join Date: Jul 2005
The Preacher is an unknown quantity at this point
Quote:
Originally Posted by Stony B
GROSS
There is nothing wrong with being filled with the love of the Lord. If you were to take away the shutters that blind your eyes, you would find that it is quite lovely.

pagan.
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  #33 (permalink)  
Old Aug 16, 05
ebbomega's Avatar
1up motherfucker
 
Join Date: Oct 2003
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Quote:
Originally Posted by The Preacher
There is nothing wrong with being filled with the love of the Lord. If you were to take away the shutters that blind your eyes, you would find that it is quite lovely.
I love how this rant is usually followed with "Now let us all get on our knees...."

I found God. Tried having sex with her but I was high on mushrooms, so I couldn't perform.

Every few thousand years some shepard inhales smoke from a burning bush and has a vision or eats moldy rye bread in a cave and sees God. From then on their followers kill one another at the slightest provocation. Haunted houses called temples are built by one side and torn down by another - and then bloody quarrels continue over the crumbling foundations.
- From the introduction to the fifth edition of The Principia Discordia, or, How I Found The Goddess And What I Did To Her When I Found Her
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  #34 (permalink)  
Old Aug 16, 05
C_squared's Avatar
thread killer
 
Join Date: Jan 2003
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I guess its safe to say: I'll see you all in hell.
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  #35 (permalink)  
Old Aug 16, 05
Ever666
 
Join Date: Apr 2003
Clayton. has a spectacular aura aboutClayton. has a spectacular aura aboutClayton. has a spectacular aura about
If you get there first make sure you got a doobie waiting for when i get there.
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  #36 (permalink)  
Old Aug 16, 05
C_squared's Avatar
thread killer
 
Join Date: Jan 2003
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that's if I'm not being dismembered again and again for all my sins... then yeah sure, I'll twist one up. :D
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  #37 (permalink)  
Old Aug 16, 05
Ever666
 
Join Date: Apr 2003
Clayton. has a spectacular aura aboutClayton. has a spectacular aura aboutClayton. has a spectacular aura about
Maybe Lucifer likes dnb.
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  #38 (permalink)  
Old Aug 16, 05
ebbomega's Avatar
1up motherfucker
 
Join Date: Oct 2003
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"Let's assume that they're right and Rock 'N' Roll is the music of the devil? Okay?... WELL AT LEAST HE CAN FUCKING JAM!"
- Bill Hicks
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  #39 (permalink)  
Old Aug 16, 05
C_squared's Avatar
thread killer
 
Join Date: Jan 2003
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I'm going to assume Satan is a huge fan of Johnny Cash, and gagsta rap.
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  #40 (permalink)  
Old Aug 16, 05
_________________________
 
Join Date: Feb 2003
Chewy has a spectacular aura aboutChewy has a spectacular aura aboutChewy has a spectacular aura about
Quote:
Originally Posted by k-pryde
if you guys are for real, stop trying to front like you're some kinda jesuit missionary. try reaching out to the raver scum with alternate methods

yea.. like offer us stuff .. hookers and blow would be a good idea for starters
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  #41 (permalink)  
Old Aug 16, 05
Registered User
 
Join Date: Feb 2004
LeeBrat is on a distinguished road
i personally dont care if people are religious or not, what bothers me about some people tho, is when they start shoving what they belive down other peoples throats, and then making accusations
Quote:
Originally Posted by please_stop
I too, once was a heavy drug user and alcoholic like most people on this message board from purgatory.
.
B.S.
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  #42 (permalink)  
Old Aug 16, 05
Mrs. D. Bass
 
Join Date: Dec 2004
gratia is an unknown quantity at this point
um.....oh wow....this is interesting.






clay: satan prolly a huge fan of dnb...cause we all know an eternity listening to that would be hell for you! mwahahahahaha
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  #43 (permalink)  
Old Aug 17, 05
recording vocals mostly
 
Join Date: Nov 2004
optimum sound is an unknown quantity at this point
wow is this for real? there's an actual preacher character on fnk now? werd!!
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  #44 (permalink)  
Old Aug 17, 05
recording vocals mostly
 
Join Date: Nov 2004
optimum sound is an unknown quantity at this point
Quote:
Originally Posted by please_stop
Praise be!
Another soul loving towards the light of Jesus has come fourth in this pit of heathens.
I missed this one earlier...wtf?!?! hahaha
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  #45 (permalink)  
Old Aug 17, 05
Ever666
 
Join Date: Apr 2003
Clayton. has a spectacular aura aboutClayton. has a spectacular aura aboutClayton. has a spectacular aura about
Can my soul still be saved or am i a lost cause?
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  #46 (permalink)  
Old Aug 18, 05
JUNGALITHP MAATHIV
 
Join Date: Jun 2001
Rytalin is an unknown quantity at this point
rant rant rant

God is a network of human conciousness
Satan is a part of that network
due to the fact that we all have a dark side.

Heaven and Hell are states of mind, living, and lives themselves.

There is no such thing as eternal damnation.

Anyone who tries to convince you otherwise is yanking your crank.



The Bible is a trippy collection of ancient spiritually inspired writings, and has alot of good stuff in it, but to follow only the Bible is to truncate your spiritual growth.

And that is a sin, the definition of sin being 'An action that brings harm to yourself or others'

That's what I figure the definition is/should be, anyways.
I think it makes sense.


Oh yah

another thing

WTF is with this fearing God bullshit?


Whether God comes out of us
or we came from of God
or we are God
or God is some bearded loving dude in the sky

Why fear it?

God's everywhere and in everything to some extent, therefore fearing God is fearing everything.

And when you fear everything, you'll do/buy anything to feel safe.


This rantafesto was brought to you by pent up religious frustration.



[Yes I totally bit this one. Hook line and motherfuckin sinker. This fish is chalk full of LSD]

Last edited by Rytalin; Aug 18, 05 at 01:25 PM.
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  #47 (permalink)  
Old Aug 18, 05
Mrs. D. Bass
 
Join Date: Dec 2004
gratia is an unknown quantity at this point
ehem...theology 101...sorta

in response to the above rant i would like to say something about fearing God. it is not so much a being afraid of God as it is respecting and honouring God. why you ask does God deserve respect and honour??? well, because those who believe in the christian God also believe that he is creator and sustainer of the universe, that he is immanent and at the same time completely trancendant to human thought and life, and that he has the power to do basically what ever he pleases (ie: strength beyond human will, supernatural abilities...yada yada). if it is not enough that the christian God alone creates and sustains all life, which is not true of many other religions (there are usually two or more gods, or other means in which things are created, sustained, and destroyed). he can also be personal among his creation and at the same time surpass it intilectually, spiritually and physically, this is only completely true of one other religion...judaism (in which christianity has it's roots). and beyond this his power is only limited to himself, and God is unlimited......so nothing can overtake him or break his will. thus......fear the Lord.....or he'll strike you down with lighting....lol, just kidding ;)

i also agree with you somewhat about your thoughts on the bible and sin. as far as the bible goes, yes it is an ancient collection of history, narrative, peotry, wisdom and other spiritual writings. and i think that it is meant to guide the christian believer. it is not there as an answer to every question nor a means by which to live every moment of life. it is a guide. but as a guide it is also one of the ways in which God comunicates to his creation. and in this way it becomes the word of God himself. that is why christians are so serious about this book. sometimes i think they take it a little too seriously, but that's just me ;)
i think that most (level headed) christians would agree that the result of sin is harm to self or others. and this is the reason that God hates sin (not people who sin) because sin hurts what he has made. God takes sin seriously. he loves what he has made and doesn't want to see it hurt or destroyed. therefore, if sin is merely actions which result in harm to self or others, then being more "sinfull" doesn't result a person having less of a chance for eternity in heaven and more of a chance for eternal damnation. it just means that person (any person really) has to pay the consiquences for his or her poor choices (sin) that may be harmful to self or others.
anyhow.....it is important, i think, that people explore all areas of spirituality and religion and familiarize themselves with many different belief systems. this does not necessarily mean participation, but it is important to at least have an understanding in order to formulate well informed thoughts and opinions. so that one can construct his or her own belief system or religion. ;)
right...these are just some of my thoughts. and i think too much about shit....and tend to get cyclical very fast....so sorry if i make no sense.


ps. i wanna know what your thoughts are on this (everybody). what do you think about "religion" about God, spirituality and all that? what do you believe in? do you believe in anything?? i find religion, philosophy and shat like that very interesting and enjoy discussing it :)
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  #48 (permalink)  
Old Aug 18, 05
Mrs. D. Bass
 
Join Date: Dec 2004
gratia is an unknown quantity at this point
^^^^ he he..i hope i don't ruffle too many feathers ;)
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  #49 (permalink)  
Old Aug 18, 05
JUNGALITHP MAATHIV
 
Join Date: Jun 2001
Rytalin is an unknown quantity at this point
^"So... whats your angle with this whole prostitute nun thing?"
"Ohh no angles... just ciiiircles and ciiircles and circles and circles......."


The actual concept behind 'fearing god' does make lots of sense... but then why is it even called fear?

If its for the sake of slogans and bumperstickers, its really not a very accurate abbreviation.

If I hold something in holy reverance, I want to learn as much as possible about it, and be around it all the time.

But if I fear something, I want to be as far away as possible from it.
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  #50 (permalink)  
Old Aug 18, 05
Mrs. D. Bass
 
Join Date: Dec 2004
gratia is an unknown quantity at this point
fear ( P ) Pronunciation Key (fîr)
n.
    1. <LI type=a>A feeling of agitation and anxiety caused by the presence or imminence of danger.
    2. A state or condition marked by this feeling: living in fear.
  1. A feeling of disquiet or apprehension: a fear of looking foolish.
  2. Extreme reverence or awe, as toward a supreme power.
  3. A reason for dread or apprehension: Being alone is my greatest fear.
*note definition number 3! ;)
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