Colleen Findlay's funeral.

krisamata · #1 (**permalink**) Nov 21, 02

So I went to the funeral of Colleen, the mother of three that was murdered in her family home last week by a 15 year old boy.

It was heartbreaking.
i saw her husband there...just bawling, and the kids cuddling up to him...something so horrible happened to their mother...yet they still had sucha beautiful innocence.

i never knew her.
i was there to give my support to her husband.

she was such a beautiful woman. just ... wow.
she did so much...
she was an irish dancer, so they had irish dancers there...they sang an irish song, read an irish poem.....

all the kids had a turn to read something about their mom, tell her that they love her...

her husband couldnt speak...so someone spoke on his behalf...
they way he talked about his wife....was so beautiful...

i cant even describe it......

i've been to three or four other funerals besides this one...and this one really got to me.
i think the way she died...
and the fact that i kept thinking about everyone i've lost in my life..
the ones that were so young...18....22....

i dont know...i just had to let this out, i hope no one minds.

and i hope if everyone gets the chance...please please sign the petition to make sure that 15 year old gets tried as an adult.
what he did was disgusting.

CountrysDiva · #2 (**permalink**) Nov 22, 02

aww u went by urself?

krisamata · #3 (**permalink**) Nov 22, 02

no i went with my mom.

bebu*funfun · #4 (**permalink**) Nov 23, 02

krista..doesn't it make u wish u knew her when she was alive?.. grrz it really emotional attending a strangers funeral... makes u relieze how great the person was and how maybe u coulda contributed to that person's life.

i went to my friends mom's funeral last year... i shed a few tears even though i hardly knew her. she probably drove me once to a vball game or sumthing, but at the funeral my friend talked about how her mom was the first person she would ask to open a pickle jar..the little things touched me. i really wish i got to know her a bit better before i attended her funeral. what a sad sad day.

i hope her family fights hard through this period of time and carry on with their lives knowing colleen findlay will always be above watching and guiding them throughout their lives.

cinist · #5 (**permalink**) Nov 23, 02

I saw bits of it on the news. very sad, two of her kids had to have their cousins read what they wrote because they couldn't get through it. Its tough, what really happened to her is so much worse and upsetting then people know, its just a shock.

*KeLLnEsS* · #6 (**permalink**) Nov 25, 02

the 15 year old came from a messed up home and was abused. Im not saying it isnt his fault but the blame should be partial to his parents aswell.

galaxie · #7 (**permalink**) Nov 26, 02

Man...I feel so bad for her kids. I know how they feel...I gave the eulogy at my Dad's funeral, and it was quite honestly the toughest and most heart wrenching thing I've ever had to do.

Krista, when you find out about that petition, let me know.

I don't really CARE if he came from an abusive home or whatever, at 15 years of age, you sure as heck know right from wrong.

krisamata · #8 (**permalink**) Nov 26, 02

ya i have to get ahold of the dentists office they'll probably know how to get it.

natalie thats gotta be tough, im so sorry to hear that

*KeLLnEsS* · #9 (**permalink**) Nov 27, 02

A lot of people at 15 dont know right from wrong... heck even at 30 many don't thats why 19 is the age of majority

krisamata · #10 (**permalink**) Nov 27, 02

^^^^^ omfg please tell me you didnt say that

a fucking 15 year old knows the difference between right and wrong

a 15 year old knows that smoking is wrong
a 15 year old knows that doing well in school is right
a 15 year old knows that MURDERING AN INNOCENT WOMEN AFTER BREAKING INTO HER HOUSE AND THEN SETTING HER HOUSE ON FIRE SO THAT SHE AND HER DOGS BURN UP ...IS WRONG!!!!!!!

im sorry but thats no fucking excuse

JoNeSie · #11 (**permalink**) Nov 27, 02

I saw an interview with Colleen's husband on the news a while back. Even after all that's happened, he's still has a lot of confidence in God and I think that's incredible. He must have a ton of courage to be able to go through all that, and still remain a firm believer. I wish that no one would ever have to go through something like that. It's just so horrible.

cinist · #12 (**permalink**) Nov 27, 02

Krista, i'm glad you don't know what actually happend to her, cuz you would be even more angry. it's worse then anything i have ever heard. i just can't imagin going through that.
But that kid needs serious help, i mean punishment is important but more importantly he needs to be in a hospital for now because what he did is insanely horific...

*KeLLnEsS* · #13 (**permalink**) Nov 27, 02

Being tried as an adult just means instead of having trial by judge alone he'll have the option of trial by judge and jury where his lawyer is gonna pick a bunch of jury members in which he feels will "feel sorry" for the boy. and they only have toi convince one of them and he gets off scott free. Atleast in youth court he get tried by judge alone and sent to a youth detention center in full custody rather then getting off or sitting in a jail cell which only makes these people better criminals

galaxie · #14 (**permalink**) Nov 27, 02

Quote:

Originally posted by *KeLLnEsS*:
Being tried as an adult just means instead of having trial by judge alone he'll have the option of trial by judge and jury where his lawyer is gonna pick a bunch of jury members in which he feels will "feel sorry" for the boy. and they only have toi convince one of them and he gets off scott free. Atleast in youth court he get tried by judge alone and sent to a youth detention center in full custody rather then getting off or sitting in a jail cell which only makes these people better criminals

Fuck that shit.

I hope that kid sits in jail until the day he dies.

If he's tried as an adult and convicted, he will serve time in a youth detention centre until he is 19, at which time he will be transferred to an adult prison. The inmates there will whoop his ass good - and he deserves ALL of it.

Quote:

Originally posted by *KeLLnEsS*
A lot of people at 15 dont know right from wrong... heck even at 30 many don't thats why 19 is the age of majority

That's such bullshit.

Unless someone has a severe mental disorder, they know that murder is WRONG. You just can't argue that, PERIOD.

galaxie · #15 (**permalink**) Nov 27, 02

Quote:

Originally posted by krisamata:
ya i have to get ahold of the dentists office they'll probably know how to get it.

natalie thats gotta be tough, im so sorry to hear that

Great! If there's any other way that I can help out, if the family is in need of anything or whatever, let me know, ok?

And yeah, it was tough, but I wouldn't have changed it for anything, I mean, there's no way that I could have let someone else do it - no one knew him like I knew him except for my little bro, and he was too young and too torn to even get up and say anything.

Joanne · #16 (**permalink**) Nov 29, 02

Quote:

Originally posted by galaxie:
Fuck that shit.

I hope that kid sits in jail until the day he dies.

If he's tried as an adult and convicted, he will serve time in a youth detention centre until he is 19, at which time he will be transferred to an adult prison. The inmates there will whoop his ass good - and he deserves ALL of it.

That's such bullshit.

Unless someone has a severe mental disorder, they know that murder is WRONG. You just can't argue that, PERIOD.

nat, I can understand that when such a terrible case like this occurs, emotions run wild and everyone will probably want this kid to rot in prison.

but the fact of the matter is, people are going to argue whether or not a 15-year-old being tried as an adult is the best thing for him. some people will argue that 15 is still a relatively young age, and feel that there is still hope of rehabilitation (I think I heard someone mention he came from an abuse home?). I mean, can you think of how different you were back when you were 15? you can bet your bottom dollar his lawyer will probably argue that.

I'm not trying to side with this kid and say that he lacked the proper mens rea to commit the crime or anything... but having seen a lot of cases similar to this, I can just see what kind of points will be brought up.

--Joanne :P

galaxie · #17 (**permalink**) Nov 30, 02

Quote:

Originally posted by bananasinpjs:
nat, I can understand that when such a terrible case like this occurs, emotions run wild and everyone will probably want this kid to rot in prison.

but the fact of the matter is, people are going to argue whether or not a 15-year-old being tried as an adult is the best thing for him. some people will argue that 15 is still a relatively young age, and feel that there is still hope of rehabilitation (I think I heard someone mention he came from an abuse home?). I mean, can you think of how different you were back when you were 15? you can bet your bottom dollar his lawyer will probably argue that.

I'm not trying to side with this kid and say that he lacked the proper mens rea to commit the crime or anything... but having seen a lot of cases similar to this, I can just see what kind of points will be brought up.

--Joanne :P

I suppose that some people would consider that a valid argument, however, I don't believe it.

Seriously, the kid is 15. When I was 15 I was pretty much the same person as now, except that I was a little bit more shy and a little less opinionated.

If he has a or many mental disorders, then I can understand him not being tried as an adult for the simple fact that he would not get the psychological attention that he needs. If his mental tests come up clean, I say send him up to adult court.

It's just totally impossible for me to believe (and to fathom how others could believe) that a 15 year-old didn't know that robbery, murder and arson were wrong.

Joanne · #18 (**permalink**) Dec 03, 02

it's not about whether or not the kid knew what he did was wrong. it's about whether or not this kid who still has the potential to become rehabilitated should be socially stigmatized as some brutal murderer and be sent to prison with absolutely no chance to turn his life around. as a 15-year-old, the judge has a bit more discretion in deciding whether or not he can be tried as an adult rather than say... a 8 year old. but what if the kid was 9,10 or 12? where would you draw the line? there was a case in england where a 4 year old and a 5 year old brutally beat and stoned a 2 year old to death and leaving him on the tracks. would you say that just because they knew the difference between right and wrong, they should be locked away for life?

and just because you were basically the same person you were at 15 and now doesn't mean that other people who have been extremely fucked don't have an equal opportunity to change their life around. and I don't think it's fair for you to judge either.

--Joanne :P