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Apr 13, 07
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When Someone Dies : Simple little things.
Back in high school i Had a boyfriend: very innocent hand holding snuggling giggling sort of stuff:
a few years ago he died in a car crash: I have pictures of him and I poster all over my apartment, just to remind myself of him: I was looking on my old computer files, and I started laughing at some old pictures I Had taken: Then I looked in the back ground and I saw a picture of this boy sleeping on the sofa. something about seeing his arms, and rembering how they felt: it made me sick to my tummy: I wonder, how it is, I can look at the 100's of other pictures I Have of him... and this one, makes me miss him like mad? its such a small stupid simple picture: you can hardly make out who is what and where is who.. but for some reason its so hard to look at. 
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Apr 13, 07
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Apr 14, 07
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its just so strange.
Theres one picture i have of him, that he gave me the first day we met... just his face and his eyes WIDE open and he looks very shocked/scared and for some reason that pic is comforting. tho any picture where I can see his arms or piercings makes me want to cry. its strange hor memories triger isnt it?
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Apr 14, 07
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I hear ya.
A friend of mine killed himself (long story short, the mother of his child cried abuse and gained permanent custody of their daughter) over 4 years ago and I'm still trying to come to terms with it. The hardest thing is that I have a picture of his daughter and I know she's in grade 3 now and will have no idea who her father was. The mother is just that much of an evil woman. I see his picture, and I am comforted in knowing that he's not sad anymore and he can watch his little girl grow up. Just keep remembering your friends, and stay as close as you can to the ones you love.
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Apr 14, 07
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When I broke up with my fiance EVERYTHING that had the smell of him was... heart braking. and alot of people had the same calone as him, so it was crappy EVERY day I'd want to cry because someone smelt like him:
The mind is a complicated things, I dont really remember what my friend who died smelled like, he kinda smelt like Knox's geliten and dipty doo.... :) yes, thats right. Dipity doo gel... I had a friend who killed himself as well: I cant watch ANYTHING to do with Dragon Ball Z because it sends me into fits.. AND...oddly enough.... Termanator 2 - the day I found out he died i thought it was best to go to school ANYWAYS and try to go about my day to get my mind off the up comming service..... and I was in Tech Class.... a class with ALL boys.. and our teacher wasnt in and we had a double block so we watched T2: At the part when Arnald goes into the hot lava stuff at the end, I BURST into tears. and all the boys start laughing at me. "Girls cry at the stupidest shit" Then this boy who knew I had a friend die shouted out "Her friend fucking killed him self, shut up fuck wad" and.. everyone started asking questions, needless to say I was home before the end of that block. It was shitty.. so andything termantor i cant watch.
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