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Jan 22, 03
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Bye Bye BC
so yahhhhhhhh like either friday or saturday im off to Calgary. I dunno wtf 2 think i hadnt planned on being there for another 2 weeks but... shit hit the fan.I was so upset i puked. Im happy and sad and just every fuckin emotion under the sun i feel right now. It really sucks cuz my dads being a harsh prick about it has no faith in me whatsoever and thats the last fuckin thing i need right now. My moms backing me 100% and thats whats most important but i kinda wish my dad would back me 100% too for once in my fuckin life. This is just crazy im finally leaving i thought this day wouldnt come soon enough and BAM hits me in the face as subtle as a brick.uuuuugggggh im so fucked up right now.My mind is plauged with what ifs. Anyways i gotta go and bring my text books back 2 school and get me moneys aaaaaahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh hhhh
I need 2 smoke a big FAT FUCKIN JOINTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTT thanx 4 letting me vent :) 
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Jan 23, 03
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im going to Calgary cuz my bestest friend in the WHILE WIDE WORLD has lived there for the past year and I miss her like hell. Like ya sure i do have gfs down here but our relationships arent as strong as mine and my best friend Alicia. And my parents want me out of the house for my 19th which is like 22 days away, and if i was to move out my only option as a roomate would be my gf corie who is totally un reliable and i honestly cannot stand her company. Andddddd Calgary has a fuck load of jobs where as BC does not. And i need a job like badass so yaaaaaa! And plus a new city=new experiences=funnnnnnn!
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Feb 01, 03
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so ya... day times r easy night times r hard. day times im busy night times not so busy. Lay ... alone in bed... staring at the celing. Thinking of ex... thinking of family... mainly my niece. Fuck home sick sucks. Its 5;20am here... and im stuck at some dudes house who i picked up 2night. Fuck i feel dirty. ugh. I WANNA BE HOME IN MY BEDDDDDDDD!!! i wanna wake up 2 my parents fighting and the smell of coffee and my niece jumpin on my bed telin me 2 wake up. the things i hated... ive grown to miss. oh the fuckin irony. I have exactly 23 dollas 2 live off of until sumtime this upcoming week whenever i get my moola. Im stressed i just wants my gfs b-day 2 come and pass so i can come homeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee!!!!!!
i have failed and im a big dumbass serotonin u havent aquainted me with the all mighty ganj yet!!!!! fucka call me asap or sumthinnnnnnnn
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Feb 01, 03
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i know what you're going through. it's the little things you miss. but give it a few more weeks, and you'll start to feel so much better. it's a big change for you. once you settle down, meet some new people and stuff, you'll find that you think about home less and less. and you haven't failed. this is probably one of the biggest steps you've taken and in the end, you'll look back and realize you succeeded. you'll realize that you've made it in a new city...by yourself...and you can do ANYTHING. like aftre this, nothing can stop you. it's an empowering feeling, i think.
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Feb 06, 03
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ya i decided to come back 2 BC and go to college instead. cuz here id be busting my ass at some minumim wage job workin 24-7 and barely makin it from pay check to pay check. so i talked 2 my moms and when i get back im gonna register sumwhere and hopefully start for spring if not then the fall for sure. Hopefully when i get back 2 BC ill find a victim 2 live with so i dont have 2 rot at my parents house. Its wierd im like turning the page on my youth and begining a new chapter *shudders*
thanx 4 all ur support fuckas!!!! o ya is clash 5 still happenin??? cuz i wont be back for kiss :( and clash 5 was supposed 2 be on me -day so ya wuts da dilly?
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