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Feb 20, 03
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it's been a rough day
it's been a really rough day....today i was late for school...seemed like an ordinary day...until i walked inside...counsellors surrounding everyone..peolpe in the halls crying...something was wrong...so some counsellor came up to me and asked me if i knew Priya...i was like yea...and she told me the news
last night one of my really good friends took her own life...it's been such a rough thing to deal with...and it's such a shock...it's like it's a nightmare or something...like it's not true i've been crying all day and my eyes are really swollen...my chest hurts for some reason...alot of her close friends didn't go to class today....we just chilled in the multi-purpose room and grieved and talked about all the good times...it's so nice to have such good friends that care and help and support anybody who knows me close knows how much a personable person i am...and all i can think of is Priya's voice telling me how i was her best guy friend...like she always said.... this is such a hard thing to deal with...i just felt like letting some of it out..... Last edited by oFFseT; Feb 20, 03 at 06:09 PM. 
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Feb 20, 03
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It's hard to lose a friend....expecially a close friend. one of my friends was ubducted last year and we spent almost a month wondering if she had run away or what had happend to her...we all where hopping that she ran away but didn't really believe it!! I remeber hearing over the radio of all things that my dear friend had been found dead in a barn outside of town. I was just getting ready for school and had just finished my makeup when I heard...I collapsed to the floor and just started to cry!! I couldn't believe that I'd never see her again and that I didn't tell her how much she meant to me. Everyone at school was verry upset and hardly anyone went to class that day. Its soo hard to lose a friend expecially if theyr a good person...you think why her, anyone but her....
I don't know what else to say except I'm sorry to hear about you'r loss...just always remember the good times and be happy because they wouldn't want to see you upset....
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Feb 20, 03
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awwwwwwwww dude man i am so sorry 2 hear that :( my condolensces. Just keep in mind that your friend is no longer being tortured by what reasons drove her to take her life. She is free now:)
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Feb 20, 03
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ps...dont remember the way she died...remember the way she lived*hugz*
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Feb 21, 03
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^^thanks alot
tonight made the greiving better....all of her close friends got together and we had a huge dinner...shared tears and talked about all the good times we had with her. it's just so unreal..so hard to believe...i was so upset and like hysterical when i found out...i could barely breathe...my school is so pathetic...the counsellors handed out pieces of paper and i was late today so they handed one out o me...i snapped on them becuase they have to realise it's not right to do that kind of thing...ya it may be hard to tell people in person but that is their job...it was so hard to read it on a piece of paper and see her name on it it makes it so much better when you have so much support and love around you...sharing all the same things and feelings together
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Feb 21, 03
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matty...sweetie...im so sorry to hear that.
you know that im totally here for you if u need it, call me if you want to... im gonna try and give you a call tomorrow k?!? just celebrate your friend's life. think of everything that made her special, think of everything that made her have such a special place in yer heart. godessa said it best... remember how she lived, not how she died. you'll be ok.
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Feb 21, 03
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the only thing that is going to help you through such a hellish time...is memories of the good times. cherish them and keep them in ur heart. open ur senses and u will feel her near. pray to ur higher power to guide you through these troubled waters. it may seem like a hurricane now... but your sunshine will come:) smile through the tears...easier said than done but mind over matter!!! death is NOT the end its only the BEGINNING ;)!!!!!!!!!!!!
i know what its like to lose someone dear to your heart...not under the same circumstances, but ya. it sux it hurts and u wish it coulda been u not them... but we all have a time to go and some of us force the hand because we miss home :) read some of those books by that psychic on the montell williams show i did and it helped me understand and appreciate things alot better.(when im sober i can remember the name) so look 4 an edit or sumthin ohhhhhh or carlos castanata or like so many other authors/books. *through many dangers toils and snares i have already come...twas grace hath brought me safe thus far and grace will lead me home*
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Feb 21, 03
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Im soo sorry to hear that matt :( I just experienced something like that except he wasnt that close to me, he was an aquantence that i talked to once in a while and played baseball with, and even that was really hard to deal with. So i can only imagine what your going through... Listen to the advice od goddessa, just remember her in her happy moment, remember the good that shes done in her life and each smile that she put on someone elses face. Her life may have been short, but focus on the positive impact that she had in that life.
I know this has got to be super hard, but you will get through it. If you ever need to talk im here...
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Feb 21, 03
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i don't know what sort of advice to give because i've never dealt with anything like that before
but remember the happy times and try to stay positive she will always be with you as long as you never forget, which you won't if you ever need to talk, give me a call *huggles* nathaniel kristofer
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Feb 21, 03
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awww, i know EXSACTLY how you are feeling right now. My uncle who i have lived with for the past 6 years took his own life on monday. I know what your going through right now. I still dont believe that this has really happened. I cant sleep or eat and i dont want to be in my house. It happened in my house, and my mom was the one who found him. It pretty tough on all of us.
We are all holding on to the good time and keeping him alive through out memories. This has been by far the hardest thing i have ever had to deal with. BUt just remember to keep you head up high hold on to the memories and know that you are not going through it alone. I'm hear for u if u need to talk. [email protected] or ICQ me at 159500281
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Feb 21, 03
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Yeah, something similar happened to me in grade 11 with my friend Peter.
He was one of the smartest people I've ever known. He was one of those people who would fall into those 'most likely to succeed' categories. As someone who spent time with him almost every day, it was really hard for me to accept that he lived knowing he wanted to end his own life. I think his suicide was undoubtedly one of the hardest times I've ever had to go through. The whole situation brings so many conflicting emotions. I was so sad and depressed, but at the same time I was almost overwhelmed with anger- angry at myself as a friend who just didn't pick up on what was going on inside his head, and not being able to stop it...also angry at him for taking his own way out and not dealing with his problems. I'm going to tell you that this isn't an easy situation, and if you were close with this person, it's going to really take awhile to experience closure on this issue. What I found most helpful was having a really close circle of friends who were all mourning with me. But, be patient, it just takes time. It was 4 years ago for me, and thinking about it at times still makes tears well up in my eyes.. M
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Feb 21, 03
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your friend Priya must have felt a need to get outta this life so think that it might be better for her and that she's at peace~...suicide is usually what a person feels to be a last resort..a friend of mine took his life a few years ago..but from what i remember of him..it's not the suicide..it's the good times and everything i've learned from him ~
hang in there buddy..i'm glad u have a close group of friends to support each other~
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Feb 21, 03
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SYLVIA BROWN!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I REMEMBERED!!! read her books
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Feb 21, 03
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thanks alot guys...i appreciate it
it's just so rough and hard today all of her close friends...we just sat at her memorial at school...and we had flowers, pictures, poems, and everyone signed this huge poster that is going to her parents, and we listened to this cd i made of all her favourite songs from celine dion to 2pac it's so up and down right now it's alot better to be around people that are sharing the same remorse and feeling's last night all of her close friends got together for a huge dinner and we dat and shared all the good times dn memorie...it was nice..made it alot better thanks guys
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Feb 28, 03
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Well Priya's funeral was on wednesday
it was a really good service...500+ turned out...the whole place was packed and people were standing outside i did a speech...which i didn't think i could do...but i stayed strong and went with it...and it turned out great....i got so many compliments from friends, family, students, teachers, and principals....it felt really good i think the funeral was closure for alot of people...and the speeches had some laughs so that was nice...that's exactly how she would have wanted it to have been
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