what have you learned from your past relationships?

[bebu*funfun]

part of being young and being in relationships..means a lot of learning. i had a girls day out coffee thing today.. i concluded that im a horrible girlfriend/relationship person. every relationship i was in, i was always the cause of the breakup.. i have SO many big flaws.. and i feel completly guilty for them. maybe its just hormones goin crazy right now.. and the girl talk got a lil overwhleming.. IM A HORRIBLE PERSON. im starting to see an ugly pattern too.. i have such a set life, my past partners always had to ATTEMPT to adapt to me..and its TOUGH adapting to me. im so evil.

this is scaring me.. ive been looking for a "serious" relationship for a while now.. now that i think about it, it would be so unfair for my partner.. im gonna change some of my ways.

/me sticks a warning sticker on forehead

sad to say my "meaningless" relationships have been the best ones. *okay im officially goin crazy*

back to the topic.. ive learned that i really need to change and stop being selfish and i need to GROW UP. (grow up= get my ass up and get my license, think before actions...etc)

[Timdareez]

no no it's just called " PRIORITYS "

if people can't take you then....... FUCK EM !

if people can't except you for who you are and what you do.... FUCK EM !

if people don't have time to make 4 u and you can't make time for them...... FUCK EM !!!!!


YOU ARE YOU !!!!!!!!!

[Bitchin]

what I have learned?

To always expect the worse.. no matter how good things look. So atleast I will be prepared for when the guy tells me thats he has cheated or already has a girlfriend or whatever.. cause thats always the case.

I don't know if its that I push the guy away.. or if its cause I'm too needy.. or because I'm just a overall bitch.. I have no idea.

But I'm with ya on the 'I'm a horrible person thing' just in a diffrent way.. that doesn't really have anything to do with this.. or does it? Cause I thinkI have a horrible personality in a sense.. but whatever..

Relationships are bunk. :finger:

but I still want one. :soak:

[[edit_out]]

that life is pain.

[Courtney]

i am not big on relationships.

[Ragga_Wh0re]

i have learned that i should have stuck with masturbation :)

[poohbearhoney]

learn that you lilve and learn and everyone makes mistakes and people aren't always what they seem to be and first impressions last forever

[specialblend]

i learned that love fucking hurts!!!when u are the one who fucks it up...and that mistakes you make will haunt you for a while..Also i learned that love can be the best thing in the world....A meaningful relationship isnt all sex....that took a while to learn

[krisamata]

i've learned that good sex at the beginning will help keep the relationship strong.
i've learned that as long as i can call them my bitch and they'll do whatever i want...everyone's happy
i've learned that bringing drugs into a relationship like this will definitely help.

[cinist]

See the worst in a person before you allow yourself to see their best. Remember you are alone no matter what and protect yourself. Look out for #1 and don't trust.

[desiRAWR]

I've learnt that dating raver guys isn't very smart. (or the raver guys I've dated haven't all been)
I've learnt that drugs shouldn't interfere in the relationship. It can be a bystandard, but it shouldn't be constant in the relationship.

I know I've learnt more.

[Liqwid]

bev......you are young.........u'll learn more as you get older....

~Dalyn

[Chet]

wow there are some bitter people on here

I've learned that there is nothing better than getting into a bed that is already warm and falling asleep with one hand on there hip and the other on there ass
also that you might as well get out before shit hits the fan
there has to be at least one optimist or it's not going to happen
you have to trust no matter what, with out trust your just fucking some person you hang out with all the time

[MistressSpankME]

hhmm what i've learned..

trust is one of the most important things.. if not the number one priority.
not to rush into things
being a trophy girlfriend is NOT fun
you know all those guys that you don't go for because they are your firends and they are "too good" to possibly mess up with a relationship.. well those are the guys you should go for, not just any old asshole/pervert that comes along and catches your eye then treat you like crap.
I need to learn how to control my hormones, and communicate in PERSON before its too late.. NOT over the internet because i'm too shy.


And bev.. I think everyones horrible at relationships in the beggining, dude you should here my list of faults. We are all still learning and we will suck at relationships untill we find the right person or go through hundreds of wrong ones.

And tims right.. you shouldn't be emphasizing on how these boys tried to "get used" to you.. but couldn't. You are still in the process of learning and becoming a person, and its not like they were perfect... People shouldn't have to mold to you like that, they should be who they are and let you be who you are.. all the while helping you to get through these "faults", and vice versa.

[speeDemon]

no strings attached rules

[bebu*funfun]

sunshyne's first point is ABSOLUTLY CORRECT. outta my list of flings.. a few were met at raves..and thats a huge nono. im down with "ravers" who i hang out outside of raves though.. they just need a bit more depth in them.

dalyn..."u'll learn more as you're older"?!?!?! holy shit if theres mroe to learn i rather die now.. ive learned so much already that the only guy to win my heart right now must be 110% perfect for me to even consider having him as a boyfrined. I DONT WANT TO LEARN MORE! im scared of this complicated relationship world.

its really tough to be this young and mentally/physically want more.... someone pleaseee press the fast forward button.

fawk.. i can't even see straight rite now.. nitez.

[mushmellow]

i've learned that guys harsh hurt girls....like bev...shes not horrible at all!! fuck shes a great person and she shouldnt feel like shit cuz of stupid guys that dont see the best parts of her

[mushmellow]

ive also learnt that you shouldnt ever hold back from other guys just because of one person! and never trust anyone

[stabmyhead]

To those that complain about getting hurt: Most the time, people will hurt you if they have a reason to. I find most of these 'victims' set themselves to be hurt in the first place by getting into situations they know are going to end in heart break. By getting into the situation and staying there, they help create and encourage negative behaviour from their partner. This not only becomes damaging to the relationship/self esteem, in the long run, a lot of these 'victims' never learn. It gives them a warped perception of what 'love' or whatever really is, and they become bitter, yet most the time, STILL get into stupid situations.... In a sense they don't really have the right to complain because it's almost their own fault they got to that point in the first place.


ANYWAYS, now that I've got a bit off my chest, what I've learned from relationships, observing my own, others, etc: The obvious, people aren't always as they seem. A lot of people have skeletons hidden in their closets, and upon discovering them could completly change one's opinion of the other person... If they accept you for it and don't think of you any differently, then it's aparent that they care enough about you to not let such things bother them (or they dont' care enough about what you did because they just want to get ask).

Dating people you are friends with and know well is better than dating someone you just kinda met. There is already loyalty and trust built up from the friendship and you know what to expect from them. There are no weird suprises like, "GUESS WHAT I'M REALLY A GIRL!" or "Finally we're going out, I don't have to stalk you and steal your underwear anymore." Another bonus is if you're frineds with their friends, then you can all hang out and not look like "The BF/GF", and retain the same 'status' as you had before. THey are also the people that you will care about the most, you'll be able to chill, relax and be yourself without worrying how they view/judge you.

This works with either sex but I've never been hit on by a girl so: most guys that try to pick you up when you're out should be ignored and laughed at. I mean if you're stupid enough to be suckered in by some dumb guy and his loser 'player free boy' tactics, then you almost deserve to get fucked over. No one can change the bad boy/player, and even if you do, it's only for a short while until they get what they want from you, and if they don't, you'll get dumped for not putting out. Which is just a blessing in disguise.

I used to think I liked possessive guys, but they're a lot more work than they're worth most the time.

Settling with someone just because you're lonely or you feel sorry for them, NEVER WORKS.

Putting up barriers, walls and obstacles for your partner, you are contributing to the mind games and will probably end up increasing your paranoia and push the person away. Usually a bad experience blinds you and hinders you from growth and development. Development on a relationship based level is often stunted when one partner chooses to place doors without keys for their partner to try to deciefer. People shouldn't let bad experiences distrupt present/future relationships because everyone is different, and when presented in a new situation, one should acquire new rules to adjust and adapt to.

Love is just a word, find your own meaning for it. Never use someone else's.

No relationship is really 'wasted' because with each one you learn something new about what you want/need, yourself and life. Even if it's a bad relationship, I find that's where you learn some of the most valueable lessons. Nothing is wasted if you learn something.... Now, if you went through the same type of situation over and over again, then you're just being a moron and I would suggest you take a break from dating to figure out what's wrong, why, and the possiblities... don't always make up excuses or find a scapegoat for you to point your finger at.

Well that's about all I can think about for now... there's so much more though. Reading about it won't help, you'll have to go out and figure it out yourself.

[dj4mula]

^^^^
Wholy fuck Stabby, that's a lot to type. My god! And again we see each other at Metro and you dont acknowledge me. :toasted:

My last relationship I learned Age Aint Nothin But A Number..(who can finish the rest of the song?)....Heh....This can be a good thing, but in my case, it was bad. She didnt know what she wanted and didnt even know why she got into the relationship. NOT GOOD. Boo Urns!!

That is all....

[stabmyhead]

Originally posted by mushmellow:
ive also learnt that you shouldnt ever hold back from other guys just because of one person! and never trust anyone

I would argue that you should trust people, but never fully. Always give yourself the benefit of doubt, just incase... It's funny how people always say 'trust no one' and then end up contradicting themselves by 'trusting someone' can getting hurt by it...


i've learned that guys harsh hurt girls....like bev...shes not horrible at all!! fuck shes a great person and she shouldnt feel like shit cuz of stupid guys that dont see the best parts of her

People, harsh hurt other people, it is not limited by sex.. girls are just more discrete about it. She may not be a horrible person (I don't really know her), but she could be doing something to contribute to 'negative behavious' directed towards her. I don't know her situation so I can't really say, but a lot of times, people end up 'encouraging' bad behaviour in the other person by letting it happen to them. By not doing anything about it, or getting yourself caught up in something you can't handle, you are saying, "It's okay to hurt me, THANK YOU." That in itself is more damage than what the other person can do to you.

And Bev, although I don't know you or what you've gone through, I can tell you this, THERE IS STILL A LOT MORE TO LEARN. Never believe you know all there is to know about something... because when you are proven wrong and an incident occurs unexpectedly, you're going to get knocked down with emotional paranoia again. Then again, that's kinda obvious... Everyone has their own faults, there are people that will accept you and love you for them regardless as to how bad these flaws are... but first, you should learn to accept them yourself. I know, it's very cliche to say so, but it's true.

If you think about it, if you don't think that you're a wonderful person or whatnot, how do you expect to believe others when they tell you that they think you're a wonderful person? I'm not saying you need to be arrogant, but know thyself. If you don't believe what the other person has to say, then it'll just cause more paranoia and stress as you try to pin point in your chaotic mind as to what their 'true intentions' are. IT'S ALL A CONSPIRACY!! I'm not saying trust everyone with your heart, but you have to give a little to get a little..

[Prissypants]

I've learned that nobody is really who you think they are (this could be for better or worse)

I've learned that if you are wondering about how good the person is for you then you are not with the right person.

I've learned that people's physical needs and emotional needs seldom coincide.

[~lazee_grrl~]

i've learned that i don't want one for a while~

[Liqwid]

Originally posted by BeBu*FunFun
dalyn..."u'll learn more as you're older"?!?!?! holy shit if theres mroe to learn i rather die now.. ive learned so much already that the only guy to win my heart right now must be 110% perfect for me to even consider having him as a boyfrined. I DONT WANT TO LEARN MORE! im scared of this complicated relationship world.

i meant about yourself........once you know yourself more you can def. make better decisions........

~DAlyn

[lucy]

I have learned that the best relationships happen once you are confident and certain of who you are, what you want, what you need, and where you are going. It works so well when two people are heading in the same direction...and this is hard to find until you've been out of school for a while.

The most thrilling experiences happen when you are fully aware of yourself, your needs, and what you have to offer, and then you run out and meet someone, take a risk, and be vulnerable, and the rewards are HUGE!