a bit sad

wum · #1 (**permalink**) Apr 13, 05

there's a slightly mentally handicapped gentleman who's been an assistant at my workplace for over 15 years and everyone loves him. he's a bit neurotic, but lots of fun.

i guess you'd call him a "high functioning" disabled person, and from what i gather it's just been him and his mom all this time since his dad bailed from early on. they really love eachother, and for the 6 months that i've done my job you could always count on jim's mother to bring him a sandwich, fix his collar, and check in on him every noon like a mother checking on her young son.

his mother has never remarried, and i guess they've always kept this same dynamic all this time. I can only imagine how much his mother was the world to him. we just got news that Jim's mom died today.

I've never seen a grown man sob before and it's really heartwrenching.

i'll post more later.

thanks for letting me vent

:(

mapleleaf4ever · #2 (**permalink**) Apr 13, 05

You should make him a Sandwich and give him a Hug. :)

.:kinkster:. · #3 (**permalink**) Apr 13, 05

:( Its always difficult to loose a loved one, I can only immagine how hard it would be on your co-worker. I hope theres someone there too look out for him. Its a horrible reality, but without family or a friend to help people like your friend, they end up on the street or in programs. Do you know what is going to happen with him?

LeeBrat · #4 (**permalink**) Apr 13, 05

omg, thast so sad..that story really touched my heart...poor guy :(i wonder how hes gonna manage :( i hope everything works ou in the end tho...:(*hugz*

wum · #5 (**permalink**) Apr 13, 05

Quote:

Originally Posted by .:kinkster:.

:( Its always difficult to loose a loved one, I can only immagine how hard it would be on your co-worker. I hope theres someone there too look out for him. Its a horrible reality, but without family or a friend to help people like your friend, they end up on the street or in programs. Do you know what is going to happen with him?

ya, we're all just taking it in right now.

I'd hate for him to be a street person, or end up in a home. fuck :(

impure · #6 (**permalink**) Apr 13, 05

do the christian thing wummy and take him on.
my sis is handicapped, and when my parents finaly die i will be responsible for her until the end of her life. i would never EVER let my big sis go to a home. EVER.

Ree Fresh · #7 (**permalink**) Apr 13, 05

Yikes... Ive known of alot of ppl who are on the "higher fuctioning" side of things and the ones who have a parent/sibling willing to take care of them is such a great gift! Otherwise many of them fall through the cracks if there not "low" enough for the ministry to take care of them.

Poor guy... I like eric's Idea. Make him sandwiches and try to be there for him. Cus he obviously needs it.

Krusha · #8 (**permalink**) Apr 13, 05

poor guy , when a person soo close to you dies i strongly believe a piece of your soul dies with them

LLaaUUrrYYn · #9 (**permalink**) Apr 13, 05

How sad..reminds me of a movie.. I just cant remember which one.

I think Erics idea is excellent. Not only will he know that you care about him, it will make him feel close to his mother. I hope everything works out for him.

impure · #10 (**permalink**) Apr 13, 05

is the movie you're thinking of called I Am Sam?

LLaaUUrrYYn · #11 (**permalink**) Apr 13, 05

Quote:

Originally Posted by impure

is the movie you're thinking of called I Am Sam?

No.. Its about football and the guy was black.. hmm

Ragga_Wh0re · #12 (**permalink**) Apr 13, 05

^the movie is radio:P

thats pretty rough and my heart goes out to that guy.If i ever lost my mom id be complete wreck,Im going to go and hug my mom now.

mojo · #13 (**permalink**) Apr 13, 05

poor guy. he is never going to be the same.

wum · #14 (**permalink**) Apr 13, 05

^ *edit for goddessa* you didn't even cuss me out that time! :)

xxViceRoyxx · #15 (**permalink**) Apr 14, 05

Tell me about it i lost more than a dozen family members, close relatives, 2 of them died in front of me like right infront of me, saw one of them have his head blown up by a mortar missle and the other get impaled on a school gate.
Its rough but with the right people around you, you can get over Anything and i mean Anything..........well almost.
Well sorry to hear about your friend and good luck.

mugsy · #16 (**permalink**) Apr 14, 05

my auntie is mentally handicapped and after my grandpa died and my grandma got sick, we all found a family that would take care of her in kamloops. (at the time she did not want to be away from her mom) her best friend who is "high functioning" as you said, also moved in with the family, and after my grandma passed away my auntie was given the choice to stay or come here or live with my other uncles and she choose to stay.
im not really sure of the whole process of finding a foster home (i was really young when this all happened), but from personal experience, it was the best option for my auntie besides moving in with other family.
maybe bring this up with your boss or someone else?

Ragga_Wh0re · #17 (**permalink**) Apr 14, 05

Quote:

Originally Posted by wum

^ *edit for goddessa* you didn't even cuss me out that time! :)

dear wum:

I hope you enjoy your stay in the land of GO FUCK YOURSELF.

Sincerely:

~*goddessa*~

wum · #18 (**permalink**) Apr 14, 05

so i saw Jim today in the copier room.

i think he wants to pretend that he can continue life on as usual, and i don't blame him. It's been explained to me that he's had this clockwork routine for about 15 years and got a chance to feel important to the people around him, everyday, and make his mother proud in the process. This is really important for disabled persons.

So he was just going about his business, although pretty subdued and quiet. When one of the older ladies came and put her arm around him asking him if he wanted to go home he snapped at her.

At lunch time someone had to lend him a few bucks, because he’s never eaten at our caff before in the 15 years that he's worked here because his mom has never missed a beat making his lunch. Can you imagine that??

The guy was lost on where to get his food, and I can’t imagine how he’ll get by with the rest of his life :(

He went to the park to take his lunch, and the poor guy was just rocking back and forth with grief. when a few of the women went to try to talk him he was crying and putting his hands over his face like a little kid.

i got to talk to him later on and we talked about God and heaven and he asked me if i wanted to go with him to church for a "Singspiration". heh.

this is so fucked up, this whole situation.

.:kinkster:. · #19 (**permalink**) Apr 14, 05

you get my PM on this wum?

wum · #20 (**permalink**) Apr 14, 05

Quote:

Originally Posted by .:kinkster:.

you get my PM on this wum?

yes. i'll get to it soon

Bitchin · #21 (**permalink**) Apr 14, 05

wow, that's really unfortunate.
It's rough that his mom, didn't prepare him for such an incident, becasue she had to of known she wasn't gonna be there for him, his entire life. should have given him baby steps to prepare him.
I'm sure if he's determine enough to keep up what he's been doing for the past 15 years, he'll try his darnest to do his best. It's amazing how lil'determination can get you so far.

Best of luck to him.

hardstylin · #22 (**permalink**) Apr 14, 05

well this thread just ruined my 2005, i feel major sorry for that dude.

Ragga_Wh0re · #23 (**permalink**) Apr 15, 05

Quote:

Originally Posted by wum

so i saw Jim today in the copier room.

i think he wants to pretend that he can continue life on as usual, and i don't blame him. It's been explained to me that he's had this clockwork routine for about 15 years and got a chance to feel important to the people around him, everyday, and make his mother proud in the process. This is really important for disabled persons.

So he was just going about his business, although pretty subdued and quiet. When one of the older ladies came and put her arm around him asking him if he wanted to go home he snapped at her.

At lunch time someone had to lend him a few bucks, because he’s never eaten at our caff before in the 15 years that he's worked here because his mom has never missed a beat making his lunch. Can you imagine that??

The guy was lost on where to get his food, and I can’t imagine how he’ll get by with the rest of his life :(

He went to the park to take his lunch, and the poor guy was just rocking back and forth with grief. when a few of the women went to try to talk him he was crying and putting his hands over his face like a little kid.

i got to talk to him later on and we talked about God and heaven and he asked me if i wanted to go with him to church for a "Singspiration". heh.

this is so fucked up, this whole situation.

doo eet!
honestly,hes reaching out to you...so dont turn him away.

impure · #24 (**permalink**) Apr 15, 05

Quote:

Originally Posted by wum

so i saw Jim today in the copier room.

i think he wants to pretend that he can continue life on as usual, and i don't blame him. It's been explained to me that he's had this clockwork routine for about 15 years and got a chance to feel important to the people around him, everyday, and make his mother proud in the process. This is really important for disabled persons.

So he was just going about his business, although pretty subdued and quiet. When one of the older ladies came and put her arm around him asking him if he wanted to go home he snapped at her.

At lunch time someone had to lend him a few bucks, because he’s never eaten at our caff before in the 15 years that he's worked here because his mom has never missed a beat making his lunch. Can you imagine that??

The guy was lost on where to get his food, and I can’t imagine how he’ll get by with the rest of his life :(

He went to the park to take his lunch, and the poor guy was just rocking back and forth with grief. when a few of the women went to try to talk him he was crying and putting his hands over his face like a little kid.

i got to talk to him later on and we talked about God and heaven and he asked me if i wanted to go with him to church for a "Singspiration". heh.

this is so fucked up, this whole situation.

i assume you're going to go with him.
this is all so sad.
does he have any family to help him?

wum · #25 (**permalink**) Apr 15, 05

Quote:

Originally Posted by impure

i assume you're going to go with him.
this is all so sad.
does he have any family to help him?

as it turns out, his aunt will moving in with him.

i think all the practical stuff for him will be taken care of. it's just that he's got the mental age of a kid he's said a few things hinting that he's got nothing else going for him. it's kinda freaking us out.