Being sick from medication....

[Cdn_Brdr]

I hate this so much...

I've been put on a new form of treatment for my cancer and it's making me so sick that I'm completely useless. Yesterday I threw up so hard that I popped all the blood vessels in my eyes.... it looks like I got punched in the face, TWICE.

I can't work because I'm so sick and my medical disability hasn't gone through yet so I have no money to even pay my bills. The worst of this whole thing is that I'm letting all of this get to me and I feel depressed to the point of tears. My mom lives near Vernon so I can't even see her for comfort.

I don't want to let this sickness beat me but when nothing seems to be going right its so hard to keep your chin up, especially when you're sitting at home alone. This sucks more than anything I've ever had to deal with in my life... I hate it and I want it to go away.

[Ragga_Wh0re]

^even tho u show clear distatse for me,i just wanna say im sorry to hear that ur going through such a rough time. Call up some of your friends and talk to them maybe one of them will come visit u, or call ur momma and look at photos of her and other photos of happier times. When i was away from my family and all depressed and going through hard times i turned to my photo album for solace:)

hold on and keep on keeping on things will get better.

[miss.myra]

:014:

[All!e]

What kind of medication are you on?

I know how you feel, as I'm going thgough the same thing. Today was my 3rd of 4 days of my 9th round of chemo.

If you ever want to talk about treatments I'll all up for listening. I'm trying to organize a group, sort-of support group like, for young adults like 18-28 or so. There is a lot of support for children and a lot of people over 30. If I manage to get anything up and running I'll let you know if you'd like.
I met a 26 y/o guy this wk, he's from Langley and has Ewings - he's very ill and needs people to talk to. Once I manage to get a hold of him maybe if you'd like, we could all meet up somewhere for coffee or beer or something.

I know it's hard to keep your head up, espeically when everything inside of you is coming out - but know that the treatment that they have now is doing wonders. Everything will get better, just remember you have a lot of support from people that care about you. Even if they can't be with you all the time, I'm sure they are thinking about you.

I hope you start to feel better :D

* allie

[Goat]

And now I will show you the most excellent way:
If I speak in tongues of men and of angels, but have not love, I am only a resounding gong or a clanging cymbal. If I have the gift of prophecy and can fathom all mysteries and all knowledge and if I have a faith that can move mountains, but have not love, I am nothing. If I give up all I possess and surrender my body to the flames, but have not love, I gain nothing.
Love is patient; love is kind; it does not envy; it does not boast; it is not proud. It is not rude; it is not self-seeking; it is not easily angered; it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres.
Love never fails. But where there are prophecies, they will pass away; where there are tongues, they will be stilled; where there is knowledge it will pass away. For we know in part and we prophesy in part, but when perfection comes, the imperfect disappears.
When I was a child, I talked like a child, I thought like a child, I reasoned like a child. When I became a man, I put childish ways behind me. Now we see but a poor reflection, then we shall see face to face. Now I know in part; then I shall know fully, even as I am fully known.
And now these three remain: faith, hope and love, but the greatest of these is love.
- I Corinthians, chapter 13

Our greatest glory is not in never failing, but in rising up every time we fail.
- Ralph Waldo Emerson

I hope you can get through what you're going through quickly. It's hard feelings so far down in a hole that the light can't reach where you are.

If it makes any difference, I believe in you.
If you need someone to talk to when depression pot shots you, there's an open ear here, even if you just need to get things off your chest.

Take care.

-Max

[Cdn_Brdr]

Thanks everyone..... it's hard but its nice to know that people actually give a shit.

My meds are producing sleepless nights, fear, loneliness, tears, anger... all the emotions you don't like to have. I think its just never hit me this hard before. I've been onmeds and they've made me sick but not like this. I'm sick every single day.

I think its just really hitting home what I'm dealing with now. I always knew that prostate cancer was bad but now that its spread to my colon I've got that 'lmy life is in its hands' sort of feeling and it scares me.

Anyways, thanks for the kind messages and I do cherish them... a little support really can go a long way. :kimmie:

[Chet]

dood sorry to hear that man
but I know you will beat this
you have love and support from alot of people on this board alone
I mean, cmon man, your CANADIAN BOARDER ;)
stay positive man
you have alot of good time ahead of you still

[Cdn_Brdr]

I'm keeping this anonymous to avoid possibly embarassing the author but this just goes to show what kind of friends I have... I should consider myself one of the luckiest people in the world because not everyone can have friends as devoted as this:

I want you to know how much I really do care for you - as a friend i love you and if you need anything that I can help you with - please don't ever hesitate to ask - you are a special man Mr.Shawn - I knew that even before we met
i tried to tell you on your birthday that I have always felt that you and I were to know one another - and now that we do, we have many things in common and as i have said before i feel as though i have always known you - we got along famously right off the bat and maybe that's common place for you (mr popularity) but it's a rare thing for me

you are an exrtodinairy person Shawn - don't you ever forget it - and you are capable of extra-ordinary things . don't for second think you won't or can't beat anything that gets in your way - I know you know your own stregth, but if there is ever a moment where you doubt it - I will not hesitate to remind you

I will phone you later - i eould love to visit anyway as I have not seen in you in what feels like a long while

Thank you so much because that little bit of support really helps me to drag my ass through my day. Times like this it makes me feel like its ok for a grown man to cry his face off....