girls: do you touch guys you have only friendly interest in?

[Gunter S]

i have a coworker who will fix my collar, jab me with her fingers to make a point, brush something off my shoulder, and mess with my hair, and always talks about 4 inches from my face at coffee break.

she mentioned that she had a boyfriend so im wondering if this is just 'friendly' flirting or what

holla back

[Myka]

Hehehe...flirting doesn't always mean she wants you.

[decypher]

Maybe she's the motherly type.

[.Promoter]

Girls are devious, they do that all the time, and then when you fall for it they go.. "I never said i liked you, I flirt with everyone". But then when they like you and you dont notice they break down and cry and go "Omg how did you miss all those signals i was sending."

So basically you are fucked sideways in either scenario, and you might as well just give up. Try and find out what kinda girl she is, if shes the flirty type dont bother, if she leads you on, dont bother, and if shes just a slut take her out for dinner... it will be worth the later awkwardness at work.

[Gunter S]

she's also constantly giving me the squish hug

[Gunter S]

Originally Posted by Myka

Hehehe...flirting doesn't always mean she wants you.

just for kicks then?

[robyn]

i do, but i was raised with no boundaries.

[Gunter S]

Originally Posted by robyn

i do, but i was raised with no boundaries.

do you touch girls the same way?

[NinjaBoy]

please say yes.

[robyn]

yes, i scratch their backs and give them crushing hugs... sexily.

[Myka]

Originally Posted by .Promoter

Girls are devious, they do that all the time, and then when you fall for it they go.. "I never said i liked you, I flirt with everyone". But then when they like you and you dont notice they break down and cry and go "Omg how did you miss all those signals i was sending."

This guy's got it figured out! :idea: Dang, here I thought we were sneaky! :P Personally, I'm a flirt with guys I'm not interested in. :nuts: If I'm genuinely interested in a guy I get shy :embarrest: and somehow lose all ability to flirt. It's damn frustrating. :suspicious:

[TrixX]

Originally Posted by .Promoter

Girls are devious, they do that all the time, and then when you fall for it they go.. "I never said i liked you, I flirt with everyone". But then when they like you and you dont notice they break down and cry and go "Omg how did you miss all those signals i was sending."

So basically you are fucked sideways in either scenario, and you might as well just give up. Try and find out what kinda girl she is, if shes the flirty type dont bother, if she leads you on, dont bother, and if shes just a slut take her out for dinner... it will be worth the later awkwardness at work.

bwahahahaha. awesome.

[project.one]

Originally Posted by Gunter S

i have a coworker who will fix my collar, jab me with her fingers to make a point, brush something off my shoulder, and mess with my hair, and always talks about 4 inches from my face at coffee break.

she mentioned that she had a boyfriend so im wondering if this is just 'friendly' flirting or what

holla back

Play her game! Flirt back. but be friendly, dont assume its going to go anywhere. just be a flirt back.

[t-skywalker]

i do things like that. shes ether comfortable around u or very maternal.

or possibly just really flirtatious

[.Promoter]

Originally Posted by Myka

This guy's got it figured out! :idea: Dang, here I thought we were sneaky! :P Personally, I'm a flirt with guys I'm not interested in. :nuts: If I'm genuinely interested in a guy I get shy :embarrest: and somehow lose all ability to flirt. It's damn frustrating. :suspicious:

Lol i speak from experience, its so annoying until you figure it out, now its not too bad, you just have to know not to fall for the flirts until they get shy around you, i had a big run in with a girl like that, except before i figured it all out..... so it was like.. she was all flirting and i fell for her, then she got all shy and i thought she dint like me and pulled back.. and we went back into the friends zone like mad, and then she started flirting again madly... and oh man just led up to this giant fight with very harsh words exchanged.. now we dont talk but we understand what happened and its all peachy... i see my friends going into the same thing and im like YO step back before your dick falls off!

So yeah, life lessons work pretty well with girls... never gunna trick me with that one again. Just like all men learn the "im saying you can do what you want but really i mean you cant and if you do im going to get very angry" by the time their 15

[.LxT]

Originally Posted by .Promoter

So yeah, life lessons work pretty well with girls... never gunna trick me with that one again.

No worries, women everywhere are hard at work plotting for a new trick to dumbfound us and reduce prospective males to the emotional strength of garden produce.

[sNyx]

here is a sure fire way to find out which way she is leaning. invite her over for a 'friendly' discussion about work. its the middle of the day, no threat. when she arrives offer her a glass of tea or whatever girls drink now days. slip her a .25 dose of some fly and let her doze off. go about your regular day around the house as if she doze off. if she accuses you of foul when she wakes she is not flirting with you at the office. if she wakes up and yawns it off, your in. im sure this could work in several variations. this is an untested method. I saw it on CNN.

[Lush]

I'm very touchy with my very close guy friends because we've established a certain closeness that we know isn't going to progress on a romantic level so it's comfortable.

However, i'm not like that with my coworkers at all and if I do act like that with someone I don't know very well then i'm definitely interested in them.

Body language speaks volumes, don't underestimate it

[djmarkpaul]

Originally Posted by Myka

This guy's got it figured out! :idea: Dang, here I thought we were sneaky! :P Personally, I'm a flirt with guys I'm not interested in. :nuts: If I'm genuinely interested in a guy I get shy :embarrest: and somehow lose all ability to flirt. It's damn frustrating. :suspicious:

please accept my bad karma as a spokeswomen for all you fucked up broads and your headgames. Thanks :) (nothing personal)

[hardstylin]

sounds like she wants to fuck.

[djmarkpaul]

strong body language = she wants your cock loverboy

[.Promoter]

Originally Posted by Lush

I'm very touchy with my very close guy friends because we've established a certain closeness that we know isn't going to progress on a romantic level so it's comfortable.

Body language speaks volumes, don't underestimate it

Sorta contradicting yourself here are you not? I dont mean to rain on your parade but guys are seriously emotionally unstable on issues of that sort. Just because we are your best friend does not mean we may become attracted to you if you flirt with us alot and you are in fact an attractive person. All best friend means is that under non-flirtatious circumstances we are your go-to guy for any sort of questions or conversations on your love life and stuff in general. But once you start being flirty, if we find you attractive our penises might take over, and instead of being logical we will be illogical, and possibly think you are looking for a relationship because "we understand you so well" . Personally this has not happened for me, most of my "best girl friends" are not my type, but ive seen it happen probably 3 times at least with people in my inner group of friends. People you thought would never date or be intrested in eachother.

So a word of caution on that.. you can never be so sure. Usually the only thing keeping the guy from falling for you is the fact that he DOES know you so well, and he knows that you are not intrested. Some guys will miss that step though, and make a fool of themselves.

[.Promoter]

Originally Posted by F*r*a*

I don't flirt with my buddies...when you flirt , you're sending out a more-than-friendly signal.
And seeing as I'm attached , I don't flirt.

If they're friends , they're strictly friends. Some girls don't know the difference between being friendly , being flirty and then being a downright homewrecking whore.

Omg FRA... youve fucking grown on me.. that is the most inteligible thing i have ever seen you transmit from one IP to another on this website! This is a moment for celebration!!

yayyyyy

But seriously, thats a good way to sum it up.

[FireWire]

It's time for some relationship advice - a la FireWire style.


Gunter, you are in an awesome position. By that is meant the fact that you have a girl who is initiating physical contact. Physical contact is their way of saying that "hey - you proved to be interesting and above average, and now I want to see if you know how to pass the next step and begin playing the game on the basic physical level". You are given a chance, REGARDLESS if she's fully attracted to you at this stage yet, or not. She might like you, or she might not... but she HAS to know if you got skills to decipher her body language and start taking things to the physical level. Most girls are too indecisive to do what your coworker is doing and end up blowing it with us by appearing too distant and unapproachable (and we don't know any better that we can approach those kinds as well) - but since that girl is brave enough to touch you in those ways - then you need to take it as an invitation, because it is your clue that you are given a chance to take a risk. You have noting to lose at this point. You have to risk it at some point, or else she will think that you're a man with no dick. If she is comfortable with you touching her back, then the game continues. If she isn't, then it's not the end of the world - and at least you didn't completely ignore the chance she gave you. (And yes, even if she's the flirty type - she's flirty for a reason, and that is because she's seeking a mate. Or she's a slut, but those are not my game.)

-----------------

The rule is:

Physical contact = chance

as opposed to

No physical contact = no chance
No chance = no chance

End of story.

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I'm sure lots of girls on here are going to come back opposing what I said above, but in all reality - they would only deny it because they know it's the truth...



(Oh and I hope no one takes what I say seriously... like really.)

[Lush]

Originally Posted by .Promoter

Sorta contradicting yourself here are you not? I dont mean to rain on your parade but guys are seriously emotionally unstable on issues of that sort. Just because we are your best friend does not mean we may become attracted to you if you flirt with us alot and you are in fact an attractive person. All best friend means is that under non-flirtatious circumstances we are your go-to guy for any sort of questions or conversations on your love life and stuff in general. But once you start being flirty, if we find you attractive our penises might take over, and instead of being logical we will be illogical, and possibly think you are looking for a relationship because "we understand you so well" . Personally this has not happened for me, most of my "best girl friends" are not my type, but ive seen it happen probably 3 times at least with people in my inner group of friends. People you thought would never date or be intrested in eachother.

So a word of caution on that.. you can never be so sure. Usually the only thing keeping the guy from falling for you is the fact that he DOES know you so well, and he knows that you are not intrested. Some guys will miss that step though, and make a fool of themselves.

There's a difference between flirty and friendly touching - I really think the motive behind the touching becomes apparent when you've been friends for several years.
The friendships I'm describing are friendships that have sustained themselves for years - these are guy friends who are like brothers to me.
I'm one of those super straight forward people and I don't like to lead people on so I set boundaries and if I feel like those boundaries aren't being respected or if the other person is being dishonest then I'll call them on it.
The guy/girl friendships you are describing sound a lot different from mine, or perhaps I just have really intelligent friends who don't assume that I want to marry them.