how do you tell him....?

[tango]

i have a really dumb girl question to ask...
i think i'm falling in love with one of my best friends and i'm not sure whether i should tell him or not... or if i do what to say.
on the one hand, we're such great freinds and we have alot of fun together and i dont want to jeopardize that part of our relationship...
but on the other hand, he's totally amazing and we're such a great fit.
we both have relationship issues meaning we're completely scared of them, but there's this underlying unspoken yearning (for lack of a better word) between us.
i dont know if i'm gonna say anything, but if i were to...
how and what would i do/say...?

~completely relationship deficient~

oh and those that know me know who i'm talking about... please dont tell him...

[-evil-duerr-]

^ I recommend you make the first step.


Start with a flirtation, invite him over for drinks. Once you both have a bit of a buzz on it will be easier to discuss the problems at hand.

But judging by what you've said, I have a hunch he probably feels the same way for you- but is afraid of ruining a great friendship.

Most of the women I've been really good friends with at one point or another were women that I was quite attracted to, but I didnt want to wreck the friendship.

GO FOR IT!

[mojo]

booze, then play spin the bottle and let the magic happen.

[dj_soo]

booze is your best bet

[tango]

we've done the booze thing... and we end up making out... but that's as far as it goes.
should i SAY something? and what?

[Vitamin-X]

^Wow, you made and still can't close the deal.
Sounds like a complex relationship.

[-evil-duerr-]

Originally Posted by tango

we've done the booze thing... and we end up making out... but that's as far as it goes.
should i SAY something? and what?

you have to let him know it wasnt just the booze, hun.

get drunk. make out with him. then tell him your feelings.

see what happens. if it goes awry, then you can say

"well, it was just the booze"

:)

[rawb]

WRITE IT ON THE TOP OF YOUR HEAD

[rawb]

I THINK YOU KNOW WHERE IM GOING WITH THIS

[prozac]

Originally Posted by -evil-duerr-

you have to let him know it wasnt just the booze, hun.

get drunk. make out with him. then tell him your feelings.

see what happens. if it goes awry, then you can say

"well, it was just the booze"

:)

This is actually not a bad idea.

[ebbomega]

Say "I love you" a whole bunch. That's guaranteed to get the boy in your corner. It doesn't scare guys away at all.

[ebbomega]

SHOULD I HAVE TYPED THAT ALL IN CAPS LIKE RAWB SO YOU KNOW I'M BEING SARCASTIC?

[tango]

Originally Posted by -evil-duerr-

you have to let him know it wasnt just the booze, hun.

get drunk. make out with him. then tell him your feelings.

see what happens. if it goes awry, then you can say

"well, it was just the booze"

:)

ya i guess that IS a good out... we'll see how this weekend goes... we're going drinking tonite and tomorrow nite...

[tango]

Originally Posted by ebbomega

Say "I love you" a whole bunch. That's guaranteed to get the boy in your corner. It doesn't scare guys away at all.

dont worry... i caught the sacrasm... i'm not COMPLETELY retarded.

[PwInCeSs]

I say try and hint at it, or do the booze and express your feelings idea, could work.
I was good friends with Nathan befor it became any more, and he basically hinted at it, held my hand one night when we were at a bonfire and it went from there. Good luck :)

[dj_soo]

Originally Posted by tango

we've done the booze thing... and we end up making out... but that's as far as it goes.
should i SAY something? and what?

then you both have issues and shouldn't be anywhere near a real relationship until you've worked those out.

go see a shrink.

[dj_soo]

either that or he's just not into you but likes to keep you around to boost his own ego.

[tango]

Originally Posted by dj_soo

either that or he's just not into you but likes to keep you around to boost his own ego.

i dont think this is the case. just yesterday we were talking about what great friends we are. plus he's not an asshole like that.

[cubed]

I think rawb's is the only sound advice in this thread.

[LeeBrat]

if you guys are both good friends and both care for each other, telling him your feelings shouldn't change how your friendship is. Ive dated friends before, and even thought we're not together anymore we are still friends. so i think even if you guys are to get together, or not, if he really is your friend it shouldn't really effect things too much.

good luck hun...your an amazing woman, and you deserve someone good!

[hardstylin]

try and blow him.

then see where it goes from there.

[rawb]

I ALREADY SAID THAT, FUCK

[tango]

Originally Posted by LeeBrat

if you guys are both good friends and both care for each other, telling him your feelings shouldn't change how your friendship is. Ive dated friends before, and even thought we're not together anymore we are still friends. so i think even if you guys are to get together, or not, if he really is your friend it shouldn't really effect things too much.

good luck hun...your an amazing woman, and you deserve someone good!

thanks nat. thats some of the best advice yet.

[FireWire]

I don't believe in the use of alcohol or other substances to help a relationship develop, but I will say one thing:

Make the first move.

Some guys have a 'dulled' sense (as well as a lack of understanding) when it comes to reading the subtle body language hints that girls give off... I know I'm struggling with that. So far more girls made the first move on me than I made the first move on them.

I would highly recommend that. There is nothing wrong when a guy FINALLY realizes that you like him... he will usually like you in return - given that you both had good times together in the past.

[Digital Over]

Originally Posted by -evil-duerr-

^ I recommend you make the first step.


Start with a flirtation, invite him over for drinks. Once you both have a bit of a buzz on it will be easier to discuss the problems at hand.

But judging by what you've said, I have a hunch he probably feels the same way for you- but is afraid of ruining a great friendship.

Most of the women I've been really good friends with at one point or another were women that I was quite attracted to, but I didnt want to wreck the friendship.

GO FOR IT!

+1 to that....which is pretty much what I was going to say minus the last paragraph....W/ my ex and I when we broke up, we wanted to still be friends, honestly, its not half bad.