moving out

[SEAN!]

man, i clear more then four times as much as you and im still gonna stay with my parents until i finish school...even when i go back to school ill still eb making close to double your income and i couldn't imagine being able to afford living on my own with out some very serious life style changes. i don't think you understand how expensive it is to live on you're own. Even if you have roomates you're only making 600 bucks a month thats not going to cover anything.

of course my parents are fuckin dope..now that im 20 there more like older friends then anything, plus i have the freedom to do whatever i choose, so i really have no motivation to live on my own until i finish school.

[baby_bluez]

Originally posted by Sean!
man, i clear more then four times as much as you and im still gonna stay with my parents until i finish school...even when i go back to school ill still eb making close to double your income and i couldn't imagine being able to afford living on my own with out some very serious life style changes. i don't think you understand how expensive it is to live on you're own. Even if you have roomates you're only making 600 bucks a month thats not going to cover anything.

of course my parents are fuckin dope..now that im 20 there more like older friends then anything, plus i have the freedom to do whatever i choose, so i really have no motivation to live on my own until i finish school.

yah so you dont know what its like being me! i dont know how else to explain this to everyone who is saying "tough it out with your mom" if my mom was beating me up every night would that be different? cuz thats what she is doing to me mentally. Mental abuse is just as bad if not worse than physical. Yea i'd only be making 600 a mth... my sister moved to montreal when she was 16 making only 400/mth. I also have 10,000$ saved up which could actually allow me to put a down payment on my own place and just make mortgage payments. I would love to stay at home and have a free ride through college but how am i going to make it through college when i can't even concentrate. it was everything i could do to get through highschool! I can't count the number of days i couldn't even go to school cuz of the emotional state my mother left me in! Ya we have our occasional good times. Obviously... same way a husband and wife love eachother but when they get in a fight the husband back hands her and beats the fuck outta her. I've lived through that situation too, which is why i can't go live with my dad. :( If anything i could move out and see how it is, and if i did find it too hard, by the time i reached that desision my mom would maybe miss me enough to be a better mother/friend/roommate. I try to tell her how she makes me feel but all she says is "i dont wanna hear it hayley" so what the fuck do i do? At least im trying to get a grip on how i can plan to move out, and be responsible and mature about it. I could take the easy way out and be a 'run-away'
So i hope i have maybe clarified why i cannot live at home.
For those of you that have given me honest price figures thankyou, thankyou to those who suggest i live at home too i know your just trying to help but put yourself in my shoes... getting screamed at for no reason and even being told your worthless... nobodies worthless but it could certainly break ones heart to have their parent say it to them all the time.

[SEAN!]

Originally posted by baby_bluez


yah so you dont know what its like being me! i dont know how else to explain this to everyone who is saying "tough it out with your mom" if my mom was beating me up every night would that be different? cuz thats what she is doing to me mentally. Mental abuse is just as bad if not worse than physical. Yea i'd only be making 600 a mth... my sister moved to montreal when she was 16 making only 400/mth. I also have 10,000$ saved up which could actually allow me to put a down payment on my own place and just make mortgage payments. I would love to stay at home and have a free ride through college but how am i going to make it through college when i can't even concentrate. it was everything i could do to get through highschool! I can't count the number of days i couldn't even go to school cuz of the emotional state my mother left me in! Ya we have our occasional good times. Obviously... same way a husband and wife love eachother but when they get in a fight the husband back hands her and beats the fuck outta her. I've lived through that situation too, which is why i can't go live with my dad. :( If anything i could move out and see how it is, and if i did find it too hard, by the time i reached that desision my mom would maybe miss me enough to be a better mother/friend/roommate. I try to tell her how she makes me feel but all she says is "i dont wanna hear it hayley" so what the fuck do i do? At least im trying to get a grip on how i can plan to move out, and be responsible and mature about it. I could take the easy way out and be a 'run-away'
So i hope i have maybe clarified why i cannot live at home.
For those of you that have given me honest price figures thankyou, thankyou to those who suggest i live at home too i know your just trying to help but put yourself in my shoes... getting screamed at for no reason and even being told your worthless... nobodies worthless but it could certainly break ones heart to have their parent say it to them all the time.

yeha your situation seems pretty rough but you may have to tough it out because you couldn't buy any home in british columbia with a 10k down payment...unless you wanna live in a trailer park.
banks usually want people with stable jobs who can afford around 25% of the total cost of the home as the intial downpayment.

so even for a shitty little wood framed condo in burnbay you would need around 25k.

[Lush]

Hayley, I'm so sorry to hear about what you're going through, that's totally awful and on some levels I can relate because a lot of the time my parents treat me the same way by calling me a "failure" and such but I don't think it's quite as severe as the position you're in. Just remember that an experience like this will make you so much stronger and make you capable of withstanding almost any emotional issues that you might have in the future.
I also want to thank you for starting this thread, it has been super informative and helped me grasp an idea of how I should prepare myself when I plan on moving out.
Oh and for the replies that have been more of an opinion rather than information, I don't quite think that's what she was asking for. It's easy for us to say something like "you shouldn't move out, just bear with whatever it is you're going through" but she didn't ask for an opinion she asked for information.

Thanks again Hayley, and try and take it easy

[alkatraz]

you seem pretty serious about this decision baby_bluez so I would recommend giving it a shot. =)

I already gave you my spiel and disclaimer about the reality of the costs so if you're down with that then my only suggestions:

A) make sure you always have a home to go back to if it fails (make sure your mom doesn't make that move into a 1 bedroom house!)

B) don't dip into your savings in order to survive, if you get in over your head you don't want to ruin everything you've worked hard for in a matter of months


Good luck!!!