Sobriety

[Lil Jenna]

It’s a lot harder than I thought it was going to be. I was doing really well with not drinking. I shouldn't/can't drink because typically I’m not a nice drunk. I don’t know my limit and every time I drink no matter how hard I try to only have one or two it always turns into more than that. I did have a wicked time this weekend and didn’t turn into super bitch…. Still doesn’t mean that I should start drinking again… Oh well looks like I’m going to have to start counting how long I have been sober all over. I hope this time I stay sober longer than the last. I need to re-read my 12 steps book and stay away from situations that involve drinking.

I just needed to vent. I feel as if I’ve let myself down. I feel gulity.

[Flip]

Originally Posted by Lil Jenna

I need to re-read my 12 steps book and stay away from situations that involve drinking.

So I guess this means we can't hang out anymore :(

Now don't feel guilty, you were at the Met with me and Analpain last week and with all of our peer pressure, you didn't get drunk with us. If you can manage to teach yourself how to control your drinking, then you can drink once in a while, even get drunk once in a while, and still manage to be in control of your actions. I've had a few humdingers when it comes to drinking but for the most part I maintain self control. That's not to say that i don't need a friend to help me stand at times, but I've learned how to drink somewhat responsibly, by practicing for many years. I think the solution to your problem would be to start drinking way more often. There will be a few eeks of adjusting, lots of vomiting and tumbles down the stairs, but after a while you'll get used to being loaded and it will be easier to handle. If ya need a drinking partner, I'm more than willing to help out a friend.

[PaIniNyErAnUs]

awwwww im sorry babe, i didnt kno you weren't drinkin, ill no better for next time

[Wont_Stop]

Originally Posted by Lil Jenna

It’s a lot harder than I thought it was going to be. I was doing really well with not drinking. I shouldn't/can't drink because typically I’m not a nice drunk. I don’t know my limit and every time I drink no matter how hard I try to only have one or two it always turns into more than that. I did have a wicked time this weekend and didn’t turn into super bitch…. Still doesn’t mean that I should start drinking again… Oh well looks like I’m going to have to start counting how long I have been sober all over. I hope this time I stay sober longer than the last. I need to re-read my 12 steps book and stay away from situations that involve drinking.

I just needed to vent. I feel as if I’ve let myself down. I feel gulity.

don't worry my friend Lannah was such a brutal drinker and now she's been sober for almost a year but before that she had tried many times and failed.. so don't worry I mean it is seriously hard and she basically had to stop hanging out with all of her friends for a long time.. even now she can't go to parties or anything cuz she knows she's not strong enough.. but it is a lot harder then people think... she even went to rehab and everything for a month and it didn't work.. but she met a few people her own age in AA and ever since then has been doing awesome

[BongMan]

Awww Jenna you really did do quite well don't be so damn hard on ya selfe. Next time I see ya I am buying you another round of redbull hahaha. Also, are you really that mean of a drunk I for some reason doubt it :)

[Lil Jenna]

^ lol On my god I have so many burses on me from breaking shit with Jere. Those street signs shouldn’t have been there... I love re-modeling the city when I’m hammered. So much fun!

Flip, Jeff & Won't Stop... Thanks for the kind words. I’m not going to be so hard on myself. Its just other people who tell me that I can’t drink that make me feel so bad about doing it. They are not bad people they just care about my health and well being. I’m not going to be a heavy drinker but I might have a drink on a special occasion. Saying that I am going to never drink is a hard statment to stand by. I am so proud of myself from being sober for that long... But if by chance I drink Im not going to get upset about it.

:)

[clearist]

Well i know where you are comming from, i have seen friends struggle, but succeed at the same goal. I only worry that im going to have to take that plunge one day. I have the type of personality where i go to excess when i have a night on the town. And worse off is that i run out of what ever it is that im doing before i hit the wall and HAVE to stop, so i never learn my lesson. Sooner or later it is going to catch up with me and it isnt gonig to be pretty. Im trying to get better now but once i get goin, its hard to stop.

[lola_phyne]

Originally Posted by Lil Jenna

. Those street signs shouldn’t have been there... I love re-modeling the city when I’m hammered. So much fun!

Me too. lol. I'm trying to stop drinking but I realized I can't quit altogether. So I just try to take it slow when I'm out. Instead of gluping try sipping your drink. Or take a longer time to get another drink. It's kind of helped me ease up. I found that not drinking at all when I'm out just isn't possible. Before I know it I've got two drinks in my hand and I have no idea how they got there. Well I hope it works out for you. I'm in the same boat.:D

[Lil Jenna]

^^That’s what I used to be like when I drank. Drinking would lead to drugs if I had access to them... And if I didn’t then it would just lead to more drinking. It was a vicious cycle. But it hasn’t been like that this year. It was really bad last year around this time.

So I took the plunge and didn’t drink all summer... The break I took was really good. I suggest taking one yourself just for a little bit. Even if it is only a month or two.

Edit: For Clearist

[clearist]

Originally Posted by Lil Jenna

^^That’s what I used to be like when I drank. Drinking would lead to drugs if I had access to them... And if I didn’t then it would just lead to more drinking. It was a vicious cycle. But it hasn’t been like that this year. It was really bad last year around this time.

So I took the plunge and didn’t drink all summer... The break I took was really good. I suggest taking one yourself just for a little bit. Even if it is only a month or two.

Edit: For Clearist

what got even worse for me was drinking would lead to more drinking wich would lead to driving... bad news bears let me tell you. One of my friends said somthing to me that really stuck and i am off the roads when drunk now. (thank god!) I have solved that problem.

It took a terrible problem to show me that any time i need help with somthing like that, use your friends, that is why they are there.

So there it is... it took me 2 long winded post but thats my advise, haha. Look to your friends.

[decypher]

It's good to keep some positive people around you. Someone who will notice that your going crazy with the drinks and come up in your face and nicely tell you to slow down. Or to remind you that your drinking really fast or just talk to you to occupy you heh. Those type of people really help to make you realize.

I know this vicious cycle all too well, i'm a bit better now then i was over the last couple years. It's all about setting priorities.

[Flip]

Originally Posted by Lil Jenna

Flip, Jeff & Won't Stop... Thanks for the kind words.:)

She put my name first, Jenna likes me best. It's cause I put-out!

[justa~gurl]

you should be very proud of yourself

the fact that you are helping yourself like this is something rarely done..

there are many many people who should follow in your foot steps!

keep up the good work!

[fable]

Originally Posted by Lil Jenna

It’s a lot harder than I thought it was going to be. I was doing really well with not drinking. I shouldn't/can't drink because typically I’m not a nice drunk. I don’t know my limit and every time I drink no matter how hard I try to only have one or two it always turns into more than that. I did have a wicked time this weekend and didn’t turn into super bitch…. Still doesn’t mean that I should start drinking again… Oh well looks like I’m going to have to start counting how long I have been sober all over. I hope this time I stay sober longer than the last. I need to re-read my 12 steps book and stay away from situations that involve drinking.

I just needed to vent. I feel as if I’ve let myself down. I feel gulity.

the guilt is somewhat natural, so feel it for a bit if you need too, but dont dwell on it too long - stay active, connected with the friends and family that you are close to do things for yourself. Im coming up on 9 months after 12 years of heavy drinking, ectacy and cocaine use. It is NEVER easy, but other things become more positive as a result, and the cravings, and all the other negetive feelings that come with trying to start a more balanced lifestyle fade into the background. Im not sure if your doing the "cut down" or if you have more of a legitmate full blow problem with alcohol, but just know there are a lot of women and men(including me) who have gone through(and are going through) parallel situations, so just know you aint EVER alone. I went through the full rehab program, and am still involved in the 'fellowship' somewhat, but there all different kinds of resources and people to talk to about any degree of a problem. keep yer head up, when you cant, there understanding headz out there you can go to. You seem to be serious about this, and are willing to do the work, so go with it, and be a little easier on yourself. :)

peace+respect
fable

[Lil Jenna]

Im ready to hop back on my sober wagon...

The past few weekends I have end up drinking with my bf ... not a lot, but enough is enough.

Woo hoo to soberity.

[spencer dawg s]

K i used to drink alcohal do drugs such as magic musrhooms and e and cocaine and weed and ritilin. but i was riding my skateboard one day smokin dope and i got hit by a car on a cross walk and went over 10 feet in the air and landed on my head. the since that day i have been sober for over 6 months because its in my best interest to fully heal my brain. it was extremely hard the first month cuz everybody but me doin it. but if u can drink still and even smoke weed then u dont need e or whatever drug it is. all depends on what you want outa life. drugs or more then just drugs : what r ur dreams

[Lil Jenna]

When I drink too too much... like ten times over my limit I tend to want drugs... Doesnt mean that I do them but I feel the craving.

Im hoping that by being sober I can influence the people who I love around me to change their ways...

[mindgurl]

I think the best part is that you are young and you have allready been able to accept and recognize who you become/how you behave when you consume alcohol.

I have a friend from years back who has been sober for almost 4 years now. Another friend who has recently just accepted that her alcohol assumption was hurting those she loved the most.

This isn't easy to acknowledge something so negative about oneself, so I must greatly give you props. After the first month you'll get used to being sober. I did it for 3 months in the spring and after new years plan on doing it again.

[Lil Jenna]

^ I was sober for 12 weeks during summer/fall.

I have become better at handling myself when Im drinking. I can limit myself unlike in the past. But I think its just for the best to be completely straight.

[Genotype]

why the hell am I replying to this post?
I guess I give a shit for what its worth.

good luck.

the only way I have been able to break any cycles of addictions is to ahhhhh, who the hell am I kidding.

I got a monkey on my back.

[prozac]

Yeah, what fable said.

I know how you feel, girl. I love drinking but I am a horrible drunk as well....and I mean HORRIBLE. (I am shuddering at some of the memories) My mom is the same and she reckons alcoholism is a disease, or an allergy that makes alcohol do really bad things to some people. Your body/mind just can't handle it at all...and then its the addictive personality that makes you forget your limit or not be able to stop.

I'm struggling to stay sober too but man is it ever worth it. I don't like what I turn into when I drink and I refuse to become that girl ever again.

PM me if you ever need to talk.

[Clayton.]

I'm sober at the moment it's only bin 3 weeks, but that's not just drinking i also use to do alot of drugs which i've also quit. I'm feeling good about it even though it's only bin 3 weeks.

[Jen-E-03]

I wish I was able to give up alcohol. I'm sure it would save me a lot of money and limit the amount of horrible mornings. I can be a terrible drunk, especially if i mix alcohol (beer+wine+liquor=BAD)...Lately I've been doing alrite just sticking to beer. Goodluck with trying to keep sober guyz, I'd like to try it sometime.