Quote:
Originally Posted by impure
well, if they're willing to put that much effort into begging, why don't they get a job?
i just don't get it.
i know some people land there by chance, but you can see bad times coming from a long way off usualy.
it's not like things are going fine and dandy, then suddenly one day !BAM! no job, no home, no family, no EI, no welfare.
i'm sure it happens occasionaly, but i think that these things can be seen coming or at least PREPARED for in advance.
always be prepared for the worst(within reason of course), right?
and i do understand that ALOT of people on the streets suffer from undiagnosed mental illnesses, or even diagnosed illnesses and they cant afford treatment. (although i do believe there are government programs that help in those cases) and for those who are living with a serious mental illness that is undiagnosed i really REALLY feel bad for and would help if i could.
but how do you determine who's there by circumstance and who's there by choice?
it's a very sticky situation.
as i always say, EVERYTHING IS CIRCUMSTANTIAL.
i do believe in CHOICE.
|
You believe in choice. Well, that's all fine and dandy, but the fact is people don't always have a choice; shit happens, and it can be unexpected, unpredicted and irresolvable. Psychological disorders, even those that most people don't consider serious (eg. depression, anxiety), are as debilitating as physical illnesses. A homeless person suffering from depression is lacking in motivation and hope. There is a chemical dysfunction in his brain that makes it impossible for him to take the actions necessary to reconstruct his life--even if they are "physically" as capable as you or I--without considerable guidance and therapy. The same goes for someone who is addicted to a substance. I'm not saying this person has an excuse for his behaviour or for his situation, quite the contrary. However, in most cases there exists a very complicated problem that needs to be properly addressed before it can be resolved. It's just as futile to tell someone like this that they're capable of rectifying their situation by giving more effort (whether it's to avoid drugs, or to get a job, or not to be so easily angered, or whatever) as it is to tell a paraplegic that he'd be able to walk if he didn't give up on trying to. A lot of people may not agree with this, but that's because they haven't experienced it. Now, I am absolutely not saying that these people can't do anything to help themselves; in fact, I'm convinced of the opposite. Usually, however, the problem is only aggravated by simplifying it or by acting like it should be easy to solve.
What I'm trying to say follows a little more clearly: You may not understand why they don't get a job, or why they don't deal with their addiction, or why they don't try harder. First, you have to realise people are different. Consider yourself very lucky that you don't understand why they "choose" to live the way they live. How many people weren't any good at math, or english, or chemistry in high school? Each of us is capable of different levels of understanding, self-control and self-determination. You might have tried your best at math, but still failed; personally, I don't understand how that could be, even though it's not uncommon; math comes very easy to me. But, this doesn't mean that everyone else wasn't trying enough or wasn't working hard, and it wouldn't do any good to try and motivate them in that way. Obviously, some people don't care and don't try, but they are few and far between. People simply don't want to live badly; it only seems that way because most can't accept the reality of their situation (and when it's that bad, you'll do anything to pretend it's not).
Alright, these remarks are based on my experience and what I've come to know in my life, insights that I believe to be a lot more meaningful than those of the majority of the population. I haven't lived on the street; I've always had people to support me; I am and always have been very lucky in that respect. But, I understand all too well how overwhelming and inconspicuous psychological disorders can be. Consider an analogy: some people who lose the ability to walk because of something like a car accident can completely recover by undergoing enormous amounts of therapy; change doesn't come quickly or easily, and it often seems unreachable. In the same way, changing the nature of a person's thinking requires modifying the product of everything that he has come to know over the course of his life. Most people living on the streets are there because everything so far in their lives has led them to be and to think a certain way. Some people can't try any harder; some people can't get themselves out of bed in the morning; some people hear voices or see things that aren't there; some people kill themselves because they can't do what everyone else seems capable of doing. The reason for this is that they're trying and hoping and dying to be like everyone else--doing everything they can to be normal--when that's just impossible. The only hope these people have is help from others. You need someone to believe in you if you're incapable of believing in yourself. I gave up caring about myself a long time ago, and I wouldn't be here if it weren't for everyone else who, for some reason, continued to care about me. The more I tried or was encouraged to be normal, the worse I felt and the worse I became. It wasn't until these people showed me that my differences could benefit me as much as they could disable me, that I was able to start making changes. I have come to realise that effort sometimes doesn't make the slightest difference, but understanding always does. Motivation isn't something you can directly control by choice or force onto someone; it happens after you come to terms with yourself and your life. People only feel sorry for themselves because they don't understand why things are the way they are--why it had to happen to them. When you make them feel like they should be the same, like it's some fault of their own that they're not "normal", you foster a cycle of denial, mania, failure, regret and depression; each time only encouraging them to believe more that they are actually incapable, and that they should give up (something that obviously was the opposite of your intention). It's honestly doing more damage than good. Even now, I don't really know what exactly can help someone to understand himself, but I do know that I would never have been able to if I didn't have help from people who didn't just dismiss me as lazy or stubborn; they could see that it was a lot more complicated than that and they wouldn't let me believe that it wasn't. If you still don't get it, it's not that you're any better than these people, you're just lucky.
Woah, this is getting kind of intense; let's take a break. Man, that was one fuckin' long post, but I had to get that off my chest. Yeah so, that's my story; I was the only one there for whole thing. By the way, I'm not picking on you Impure; this was sorta directed at everyone. Your post just sparked it, so I thought it wouldn't be right if I didn't acknowledge it. Seriously, though, people, don't take this too seriously; maybe just think about it a little.
|