Dear Bevvy:

[Bevvy Swift]

this is my help column. pm me your lifes problems and i will make them better. or i will make fun of you. and then post it!!

ps it will be anonymous, i will post whatever handle you choose to use.

[Courtney]

you are funny in a smart way
good job

[Bevvy Swift]

thanks, i hope to make a career of this

[Courtney]

haha

move to england and you will do great!

[Bevvy Swift]

hoo shit pms are flooding in..

first response tomorrow sometime, stay tuned

[Bevvy Swift]

yea this could have been cool but no one had any interesting questions.

except tiedye.

"Dear Bevvy

I've been devising a scheme, preferably involving some huge, crazy contraption, to melt all of the snow in my yard. I've got a whole plethora of multi-coloured doo-dads and gizmos but I just can't seem to make it happen. I'm thinking something as wacky as Dr Strangelove. Maybe involving a Tesla Coil?

I beg of you, what should I do?

Almost sincerely,
tiedye."

and that was enough for me.

[tiedye]

THERE'S STILL FUCKING SNOW OUT THERE! YOU PROMISED ME ANSWERS! THIS WASN'T PART OF THE DEAL, BLACKHEART!

[tiedye]

but seriously, there is still two or three feet of snow in my yard.

[Bevvy Swift]

see i thought i had until next winter to come up with something.

should have known you were living in the boons or something. your posts keep getting stranger and stanger

[Bevvy Swift]

But now that were on the topic, a tesla coil could quite effectively be used to get rid of your snow. The Tesla coil is one of Nikola Tesla's most famous inventions. It is essentially a high-frequency air-core transformer. It takes the output from a 120vAC to several kilovolt transformer & driver circuit and steps it up to an extremely high voltage. Voltages can get to be well above 1,000,000 volts and are discharged in the form of electrical arcs. Tesla himself got arcs up to 100,000,000 volts, but I don't think that has been duplicated by anybody else. Tesla coils are unique in the fact that they create extremely powerful electrical fields. Large coils have been known to wirelessly light up florescent lights up to 50 feet away, and because of the fact that it is an electric field that goes directly into the light and doesn't use the electrodes, even burned-out florescent lights will glow. As everyone knows, flourescent lights give off heat. Think about the power a tesla coil radiates (well over a million volts). you could fill your yard up with hundereds of flourescent bulbs, all sticking halfway into the ground, and activate the tesla coil in the center, and shazam! snow gets disintigrated by hot electric arcs at 1 million volts.

it would also be a good idea to wear a rubber suit and have first aid gear standing by, just in case.

-b

[t-skywalker]

i think we should forget the pms and just post them right here for all of to "LEARN" from as bevy teaches the ways=)

[sNyx]

Dear Bevvy, I have this friend, and yeah.. he has this rash.

[Bevvy Swift]

i would tell "your friend" to bathe from the waist down in calamine lotion and quit raw-doggin underage rave sluts.

-b

[cubed]

Originally Posted by Bevvy Swift

But now that were on the topic, a tesla coil could quite effectively be used to get rid of your snow. The Tesla coil is one of Nikola Tesla's most famous inventions. It is essentially a high-frequency air-core transformer. It takes the output from a 120vAC to several kilovolt transformer & driver circuit and steps it up to an extremely high voltage. Voltages can get to be well above 1,000,000 volts and are discharged in the form of electrical arcs. Tesla himself got arcs up to 100,000,000 volts, but I don't think that has been duplicated by anybody else. Tesla coils are unique in the fact that they create extremely powerful electrical fields. Large coils have been known to wirelessly light up florescent lights up to 50 feet away, and because of the fact that it is an electric field that goes directly into the light and doesn't use the electrodes, even burned-out florescent lights will glow. As everyone knows, flourescent lights give off heat. Think about the power a tesla coil radiates (well over a million volts). you could fill your yard up with hundereds of flourescent bulbs, all sticking halfway into the ground, and activate the tesla coil in the center, and shazam! snow gets disintigrated by hot electric arcs at 1 million volts.

it would also be a good idea to wear a rubber suit and have first aid gear standing by, just in case.

-b

Leviathan on here built a tesla coil a few years back, any further questions should be directed to him.

[sNyx]

Originally Posted by Bevvy Swift

i would tell "your friend" to bathe from the waist down in calamine lotion and quit raw-doggin underage rave sluts.

-b

he said no.

[tiedye]

Originally Posted by Bevvy Swift

should have known you were living in the boons or something. your posts keep getting stranger and stanger

You have no idea man. No idea.

[Bevvy Swift]

Originally Posted by cubed

Leviathan on here built a tesla coil a few years back, any further questions should be directed to him.

what, is my obviously extensive knowledge of tesla coils a little intimidating for you?