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Nov 08, 03
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gotta do whatcha like when ya like..and then make it up to him/her by doing something they want to do (and you prolly don't)
IF YOU CARE THAT MUCH ABOUT YOUR SPECIAL SOMEONE TO GET PAST THE DIFFERENCES.(thats what a RELATIONSHIP is).and getting past them is tuff... especially when you or that someone is a labourer and may be too physically tired to meet the demands..... maybe you should just DATE this guy....and have OTHER (date) boyfriends too.... to do OTHER things (like raving) ...especially if you are young... ferris bueller said it best..... Last edited by suplex; Nov 08, 03 at 10:31 AM. 
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Nov 08, 03
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anyways, if the guy is uncomfortable enough to risk your entire relationship on this issue then i'd hear him out. these OMG HE CANT TELL U WHAT TO DO!!@! posters are way off center. stop making the issue so simple, this is not how a mature co-dependant relationship works. he cant deal with you raving anymore and it is hurting what you have, something has to give. take a look at your life. why are you going to these parties, is it the social aspect? the music? the drugs? could you find these things in other places? what specific issues is he worried about when you go to parties, get him to descibe his 'nightmare scenario' that is making him crazy. basicly like has been said before is you need to have a mature talk. if you guys aren't capable of this then this is a symptom of a bigger problem. you're going to get way more out of a significant other than raving.
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Nov 08, 03
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well tell him to go to one so he can understand why you go
none of my friends liked my raving but I told them not to judge till they've tried and once they did and understood why I go they finally got off my nuts bout the issue
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Nov 08, 03
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Now since I know both you and your bf I know you aren't just gonna dump his ass over this. (or vice versa) And I know you've had many talks on the subject. What you need to think about (and some people have said this already) is what is important to you. Is it really worth losing him over such a trivial thing? It's not like you go to a rave every weekend. (or even every month) Then again, he really shouldn't be telling you what to do. I may not be the one to give advice since my bf and I have only been together a year now, but we never do that. We love and trust each other. I'm lucky to be dating someone with so many similar interests as me. But look at us at a party, we aren't glued at the hip. We run around on our own and meet new people etc. We both know we are going home together, and that nothing bad will happen if we aren't watching each other at all times and that's all that matters.
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Nov 09, 03
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I know what your going throu. My b/f hates the fact that I rave, or that I pop. I have taken a break for awhile, but he has to accept that he has his own things and so do I. I try and bring him along and he will refuse to come. Try and compromise..goodluck
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Nov 09, 03
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I'm just stating the same thing happened to me when I was 15. No need to be calling me names. :247: Where is the Love?:(
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Nov 09, 03
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K I have had a couple 2 yr + relationships and there is always one thing that you have to realize. I know this has been stated before in earlier posts, but "you have to live your life the way you want to". If and when this realtionship of yours ends and you have stopped doing what you like just because he didnt like it then you will only regret the fact that you wasted so much time not doing what you wanted. I dont know the situation you have so this is just my humble opinion yet again. GL
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Nov 09, 03
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And honey, if you think the issue is only that he hates you going to all night dance parties, then you are very wrong. There's a bigger issue here, and he's making you attending raves a scapegoat for it. You're going to need to figure out that issue all on your own, though.
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Nov 09, 03
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age, really has nothing to do with learning about styles of handling personal relationships. its experiencing failures, success, and learning what works for you. asking others for they're experience is a smart way to reflect on how you might implement a response.
there is so much to consider in this situation: - do you understand the reasons that your significant has for disliking raves? if not, find out. if you understand his reasoning, is it valid and can you find compromise on the situation? - does the way the conflict is presented between you reflect a positive or negative manner? your partner may be showing signs of how he/she may handle future conflicts. - is your relationship one worth risking over such an issue? consider your lifestyle with out raves, and then without your partner. you have the control here, not the partner giving you the choice.
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Nov 09, 03
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Last edited by Kandyapple; Nov 09, 03 at 06:21 AM.
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Nov 09, 03
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hmmm I've been through something a little bit like this....well just picks what makes you HAPPIEST.....you have fun at parties n all...but is it nice to have someone to come home too?....or would you be satisfied jus comin home and sketchin out..haha....yah dude whatever makes you sleep betta at night....
.....i picked goin to parties.....woot...er...maybe
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Nov 09, 03
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Well.......if it makes you feel better, im single.....i dj.....and i gotto raves and love them just as much as the person beside me :) he may be special and you may have been together for a long time... but does this mean that you have to stay together and not do something you love/like so much?just remember there are LOTS of other GUYS/GIRLS that can appreciate what you love to do/what makes you happy. To find a girl that enjoy's the same passion's i have is my goal for relationship......why should i/you have to pick between them?
think of it this way......forced to make a decision Would you rather 1&2 relationship choices 1) Eat Food(Boyfriend) 2)Drink Water(Rave) 3)Find someone new that enjoy's the same things you do you have to choose only one of the answers if you cant have them both well thats my say hope it helper'z u :kimmie:
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