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Mar 02, 04
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ok I'll say something here as asked. Well yes I will give a little insight into this one. At a younger age I too have placed a lady or two in this position and I'm not exactly proud of it cause at the end of the day it wasn't good for either party. The big problem here is that guys aren't being exactly honest with you in the begining. I heard the feelings grow! WEll they don't grow they were always there the problem is the guy never told you that. The situation I was in was like this:
I met this girl I really liked she was everything I thought I would like in a girl not only her look and style but her personality. It took a couple of "chance" run ins before we finally got to really chat. Now at this point I already liked this girl but she had no idea of this or proberly even remembered my name. After awhile we began to hang out more frequently and she started bringing her problems to me. Well yes it's hard to be objective regarding her problems of the heart when I think that "I would never do that to this girl" or " Man this guys really dumb does he realize what I would do for this girl." So before long htis guy friend turns into this insane jelous player hater. Finally the girl in question will break up with that guy and in a guys mind he's just putting in his time. Actually when you think about it all the guys want is well....YOU. He must see something remarkable special in you to put in this much time waiting patiently. Then that day finally comes were the guys patience where's unbearably thin and think if this girl doesn't care about me then why do I give a fuck about her. This is usually the time when the "Friendship" starts to fall apart. The big problem here is that the girl thinks "wow this guys turned into a freak in the last month or so." The truth is that guy has been waiting for you thru your last bf and maybe even bf before that. Now when was the last time you waited for anything for that length of time??????? So it's understandable that the patience grows thin hence the ultimatum. To be honest the best thing in this scenario is one of two options. 1) Actually go out with the person on a date and see where it goes. You are obviously atracted to this person personality and their life style jsut not their looks usually. Looks aint everything. Hey it might be the best thing that's ever happenend to you. 2) Cut the tie. That's right say I'm sorry but I don't think it's a good idea for us to even be friends anymore. It's the old statement of "its cruel to be kind". The only way this guys going to get over you and move on is to know that there is no more chances. He'll be upset , then will hate that he wasted so much time on you and then he'll find another girl who has so many similarites it'll be scary. I would try the first one as the girl in question didn't and I stil think I was the best thing for her. Hey even her mom thought so......sound familiar. G 
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Mar 02, 04
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Otay Hardstylin, I just didn't want you taking what I said wrong :)
MrFrost, You're right, there are appropriate times for letting a friend know you want them. when she is with someone, that is deffinately not one of them! It's good to here you know how to deal with that properly. And he isn't young per se, he's in his early 20's. Then again he hasn't been in many relationships at all, so I think he's quite immature in that area. Sean, sometimes that may be the situation. but in mine, regardless of how I would treat the situation if I was single and guarded, the fact is that I am with someone and have been for a long time. There is absolutely NO CHANCE that basicly anyone right now would catch my eye in that way, especially when I've allready made it clear I am not attracted to, or have feelings for the guy who won't give up.
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