Being Bullied

g!ggles · #1 (**permalink**) May 30, 06

I just wanted to post this to get some feed back as I've never been in this situation before until now. I reccently started a 2nd part time job on top of my full time mon-fri one. From being at my full time one for more then 3 years I didn't realize how hard it would be back at the bottom learning new things.

Here's the thing - The people at my new job are terrible to me. And I can't even explain how much I go home and cry from the things that are said to me. I feel like I'm back in high school. I was never bullied in highschool but I can only imagine how ppl did feel. I'm an adult and the fact that this is happening to me is just heart breaking.

I realize that I can just quit and find another part time job, however, I really need the money and I don't have the energy to go and find yet another job b/c it's not as easy as it sounds. I guess I'm just looking for some advice on how to respond to the situation; because for now, I'm just keeping quiet and not saying back.

thanks

mapleleaf4ever · #2 (**permalink**) May 30, 06

Talk to a Manager.

There are laws about harassment in the Workplace. Know your Rights.

Failing that, meet the fucker in the Parking Lot after work with a Bat. :)

Bevvy Swift · #3 (**permalink**) May 30, 06

stand up for yourself. whether its your boss or your coworkers that are bullying you, tell them exactly what they are doing (many people do it without even realizing it) and how much it pisses you off/hurts you.

the best solution to any problem is a vocal one.

esoter1c · #4 (**permalink**) May 30, 06

Poison them.

project.one · #5 (**permalink**) May 30, 06

Bullies do it because they know it hurts you. Stand up and tell them to fuck off. Right then they may be defensive, but they will back off cuz they know it doesnt work as well as it was anymore. But you should talk to the manager for sure.

But Im down with the bat idea!

mapleleaf4ever · #6 (**permalink**) May 30, 06

^ Yeah... Some Bullies get off on the fact that it's pissing you off and when you tell them that they're getting to you they do it more.

Just have to judge what kind of asshole you're dealing with.

g!ggles · #7 (**permalink**) May 30, 06

Quote:

Originally Posted by projectone

Bullies do it because they know it hurts you. Stand up and tell them to fuck off. Right then they may be defensive, but they will back off cuz they know it doesnt work as well as it was anymore. But you should talk to the manager for sure.

But Im down with the bat idea!

See the thing that I am most scared of is that I'm "the new" girl until someone new comes along again. If I talk to someone above them, I feel like I'm digger myself a deeper hole. I've been there for a month and I've only met my manager once. The other thing that I'm scared of is that everyone is in a little group and it's so frustrating trying to break through that.

Normally I am a very vocal person. I talk back and will stick up for myself.. but I don't want to cause problems.

Bevvy Swift · #8 (**permalink**) May 30, 06

even if they are assholes, just look them in the eye, WITHOUT yelling, tell them how you feel, and they will feel like peices of shit, i guarantee it.

cutienikki · #9 (**permalink**) May 30, 06

ill come in and egg everyone in that place! or even better their cars....haha

sorry

*hugz* im sorry everyone's a bitch to you

project.one · #10 (**permalink**) May 30, 06

Im sure I can get Bevy to come with me and you can show us who they are....

or...

How badly do you need the cash from this job? While I tend to say running away from problems doesnt solve anything. In this case, maybe you should leave the job? Your feelings and metal state is much more important then a couple extra bucks! If I was in your position and I couldnt do anything about it, I would probably just look for another job.

veN · #11 (**permalink**) May 30, 06

Quote:

Originally Posted by Cheez

stand up for yourself. whether its your boss or your coworkers that are bullying you, tell them exactly what they are doing (many people do it without even realizing it) and how much it pisses you off/hurts you.

the best solution to any problem is a vocal one.

Quote:

Originally Posted by Cheez

even if they are assholes, just look them in the eye, WITHOUT yelling, tell them how you feel, and they will feel like peices of shit, i guarantee it.

I hope you're listening to this man! I was about to say the very same Sof :)

project.one · #12 (**permalink**) May 30, 06

Bev knows what hes saying!

Or, Look at them and tell them your brother has no problem going back to jail!

Bevvy Swift · #13 (**permalink**) May 30, 06

also, a thing to remember, is if its not personal attacks, just new girl kinda stuff, you might be best to just stick it out for a while.

when i worked in edmonton a coupla years ago, i was the new young guy, and i was basically everyone's bitch. but once i had been through a certain amount with them, they treated me like a brother. so it all depends

g!ggles · #14 (**permalink**) May 30, 06

Quote:

Originally Posted by Cheez

also, a thing to remember, is if its not personal attacks, just new girl kinda stuff, you might be best to just stick it out for a while.

when i worked in edmonton a coupla years ago, i was the new young guy, and i was basically everyone's bitch. but once i had been through a certain amount with them, they treated me like a brother. so it all depends

i totally agree with everything that you are saying and I'm really going to stick it out and try my best. That's the part that I was holding out on. They are personal attacks. Which is why I'm resulting in going home and feeling like crap all the time. It's just not right...

esoter1c · #15 (**permalink**) May 30, 06

^^^^^^^FUCK ALL THAT SHIT^^^^^^^^^^^

Get some horse shit, Cook it under low flame outside slowly until it liquifies, strain it until its a smooth liquid, no peanuts.

Get the blood of 5 different people, doesn't matter how.

Mix the liquid horse caca with the blood.

Drop that in their coffes or food.

They'll die in about a week.

:306:

project.one · #16 (**permalink**) May 30, 06

Quote:

Originally Posted by 3507321C

^^^^^^^FUCK ALL THAT SHIT^^^^^^^^^^^

Get some horse shit, Cook it under low flame outside slowly until it liquifies, strain it until its a smooth liquid, no peanuts.

Get the blood of 5 different people, doesn't matter how.

Mix the liquid horse caca with the blood.

Drop that in their coffes or food.

They'll die in about a week.

:306:

As long as you and I are on good terms.... Im happy!

baby-phat · #17 (**permalink**) May 30, 06

Aw, I love you Sof! *hugz*
After giving this thread a quick read through I must say that Bevan knows what he's talking about, as does Erik (sometimes. lol).
Try to bring it up with them one on one if at all possible. And then if that doesn't help I think that maybe, even though you need the money and all, you should leave there. Cuz nobody has the right to treat you like poop, no matter whether you're the new girl or not.

cubed · #18 (**permalink**) May 30, 06

Quote:

Originally Posted by 3507321C

^^^^^^^FUCK ALL THAT SHIT^^^^^^^^^^^

Get some horse shit, Cook it under low flame outside slowly until it liquifies, strain it until its a smooth liquid, no peanuts.

Get the blood of 5 different people, doesn't matter how.

Mix the liquid horse caca with the blood.

Drop that in their coffes or food.

They'll die in about a week.

:306:

I'd do the same thing, but I'd put it in the radiator of their car.

Continuous vomitting is so much more satisfying.

project.one · #19 (**permalink**) May 30, 06

Arrange an FnK beatdown!

Heffy · #20 (**permalink**) May 30, 06

Quote:

Originally Posted by 3507321C

^^^^^^^FUCK ALL THAT SHIT^^^^^^^^^^^

Get some horse shit, Cook it under low flame outside slowly until it liquifies, strain it until its a smooth liquid, no peanuts.

Get the blood of 5 different people, doesn't matter how.

Mix the liquid horse caca with the blood.

Drop that in their coffes or food.

They'll die in about a week.

:306:

LOL, somone else knows about that! Props! LMAO!

mapleleaf4ever · #21 (**permalink**) May 30, 06

^ YES! EYE DROPS IN THEIR DRINKS!()@*!)(*@*(!)

How could I forget?! Such an easy and covert one too. No one will suspect you carrying Eye Drops. But ExLax is a giveaway.

g!ggles · #22 (**permalink**) May 30, 06

Quote:

Originally Posted by kprojekt

It really depends on the atmosphere and situation. What do you do if you don't mind me asking and how do they torment you? Is it because you're new or are they just scum? Try the introvert approach and grow in that direction.

Honestly, when I worked a job fresh out of school I was taunted by people with years on their belt... and it was harsh, but I couldnt do anything because I had thousands in tuitions. Now I laugh at them, worked my way up the ladders. SO in situations where they are just jerks, I say a nice bat to the face... or the non-violent exlax in coffee

I work in a video store. As a new person you would think that you would be trained properly which I wasn't but I adapt well to things and quickly. Everytime I ask a question they call me stupid and say omg why the hell did they hire you. The funny part is that half the stuff that comes out of their mouths doesn't even register until later b/c it's just so ridiculous. One girl told me that my shirt looked horrible on me b/c I was fat. *haha* The rest of the time it's mostly embarassing b/c it's in front of customers. There are so many more but it's so much to go through. I guess another example would be one girl noticed that I didn't have any shifts at my store and asked if I was upset. I said no, b/c I have been working alot at another location. She said " oh I guess you don't care then if you work or not. What are you bum that sits at home all day?" I said that I was a Project Coordinator for Microsoft and she started laughing and said that I was lying and blah, blah, blah. It's like one person says something and the rest just join in.

I just don't get it....

Ragga_Wh0re · #23 (**permalink**) May 30, 06

maybe if you werent such a daft cunt theyd treat you a little bit better.

:)

Ragga_Wh0re · #24 (**permalink**) May 31, 06

success!!

Ree Fresh · #25 (**permalink**) May 31, 06

Being bullied at work is nothing compared to being bullied at school. Sometimes I actualy think it's healthy for kids to get bullied once in awhile... makes them stronger inside and they learn how to deal with situations like this.

Anyways its still doesnt make it ok. As an adult you can remind yourself to keep your chin up and its only a job. It's a really crummy situation to be in, however get use to it and learn to find ways around it because half the time you will probly work with mean grumpy bitter co-workers.

First try sticking up for yourself. Work hard and proof to them that you are worthy.
Even going up to them and telling them how they make you feel will show you to be very mature.
If it still continues then bring it up with your boss/manager. They know an un happy worker doesnt make a good loyal one.

good luck and hang in there