|
|||||||
| Mind and Body Ask for advice or offer some. Keep it work safe clean. |
 |
|
|
LinkBack | Topic Tools | Rate Topic |
Jan 13, 06
|
||||
|
||||
|
Singledom.
So it's been 3 weeks for me being single. 100% my decision. My ex didn't want to break up but the relationship was sucking despite what she thought. I couldn't bare being so bitter all the time and a lot of things would have to have changed in order for things to work out in the long run.
But that's besides the point. Now that I've been single for this long It feels like forever and I find myself missing my ex. I know that this won't result in me asking for her back, 'cause the break-up was pretty messy and it's totaly out of the question. Being apart is for the better anyways-- for her and me. I guess it's the lonelyness that's killing me right now. I feel so unmotivated and lazy. I feel more inspired to write my thoughts than anything, but I'm lacking happiness, which is what I set myself to find after breaking up w/ her anyways. I know its retardedly soon to be bitching about this, but it WAS a 2year relationship... Is it spose to be this shitty? fawk. :( 
|
|
Jan 13, 06
|
||||
|
||||
|
i have only once spent more than a week getting over someone, even my three year relationship. if you are still feeling shitty about it in a few more weeks, then maybe you need to re-evaluate the situation. however, feeling like you miss a certain person, or feeling lonely are two different things. and i think it's two different stages to deal with. first thing, get past it all, next thing, readjust your place in the world, and deal with being lonely with a level head. if you don't deal with it, it can lead to plenty of mistakes.
Last edited by dabbler; Jan 13, 06 at 10:17 PM.
|
|
Jan 13, 06
|
|||
|
|||
|
Quote:
Have you ever heard of the saying, " if you love something so much set it free, if it comes back it's yours, if it doens't then it wasn't meant to be." *hugz* it will get better!!
|
|
Jan 13, 06
|
|||
|
|||
|
I guess it gets easier with time. The best thing to think about is how much more time you have to work towards your goals. I've been single for four years now, completely out of choice, because I like the freedom of being able to just get up and leave whatever life I've made for myself behind. I wouldn't want to hurt another person by just up and leaving town because I've gotten bored with where I am and what I'm doing. And whenever I want to go spend a few weeks or a month or whatever backpacking around, I just up and go because I don't have to think about someone else's feelings. Think about it this way - you've only got yourself to think about for awhile. Enjoy it. Do something you wouldn't be able to do attached, because you never know when you'll setlle down again.
|
|
Jan 13, 06
|
|||
|
|||
|
I have been broken up with my ex for over a year, still hang out and the feelings are strong on both ends. I like to write fiction and short stories but nothing has inspired me to write more than how I feel and the reality of things. Keep it up and try to look at the bright side :)
Quote:
|
|
Jan 13, 06
|
||||
|
||||
|
Quote:
|
|
Jan 13, 06
|
||||
|
||||
|
Quote:
how about this one... if you love something set it free, if it comes back to you it's yours, if it doesn't, then hunt it down and kill it.
|
|
Jan 13, 06
|
||||
|
||||
|
Quote:
|
|
Jan 13, 06
|
||||
|
||||
|
Aw Carlos..
For the first few weeks it does really suck. And well, even though I've been out of my relationship for well over a year now I still get pretty lonely. The trick is to surround yourself with good friends and hell maybe even some good booze occassionally. :) So yeah, like everybody said it takes time.
|
|
Jan 13, 06
|
||||
|
||||
|
Heh, Carlos, I'm kinda the reverse situation. I'm 3 weeks into a relationship at this point.
But before this one I was single for about a year and a half. And frankly, it was a year and a half of the best times of my life thus far. When we broke up I had no second thoughts about ending the relationship, probably felt bad about the whole thing maybe once or twice since, and haven't really thought about her much in the last half year, except to reaffirm to myself that her qualms and shit aren't my problem anymore. It was hella discombobulating at first... you spend so long with a person and when suddenly they're not there to fall back on, you're wondering what you're supposed to be doing. Vent to your friends what needs to be vented, but don't dwell on it. Just keep going with life, and the more things that happen as you go, the easier it'll be to forget about it. I was pretty happily single throughout the tenure of that time. The key was to focus more on myself and see which ways I could improve my life and jump at the opportunities to help put me where I want to be. Seriously, post-big-relationship can be the most liberating and empowering time for you. AVOID SERIAL MONOGAMY. Best advice I have for you. Good luck man. PS: Does this mean you'll start giving reacharounds now?
|
|
Jan 13, 06
|
|||
|
|||
|
Man, I think the only time I ever really enjoyed getting pissed at the Ozone was when a 1 1/2 year relationship of mine ended, Hahaha, Did booze ever take the pain away.... hahhaa, Yeah, the break up was very messy and we never got back together, but life goes on right? And life gets alot better once you learn from past relationships, cuz you'll know what type of girls to stay away from. Unless it's only for that one night...
 , haha.Man up son. Hehe, JK 
|
|
Jan 13, 06
|
|||
|
|||
|
i agree that it is good to stay bust. even if you have no one to help occupy your thoughts, go out, stay active. i found that working out helped to make me happy, even if just for the time i was doing it. its proven to be a mood lifter as well, so maybe its worht a try man.
chin up, it gets better everyday.
|
|
Jan 14, 06
|
|||
|
|||
|
When I have trouble keeping my mind off something I just invest myself fully in other commitments... I occupy my time with work or with school or keep myself so busy that I don't have time to sit around depressed and have a free moment to ponder all the things that I feel are wrong with my life.
Eventually you don't have to work so hard to let go, because time would have already taken care of that.
|
|
Jan 14, 06
|
|||
|
|||
|
^ Yes, sick Vinyl works as well... especially Pic discs.
|
|
Jan 14, 06
|
|||
|
|||
|
Quote:
carlos, i know exactly how you feel, and the truth of the matter is your going to feel like shit, regardless. the only thing you can do is better youself, and come out stronger. and many would say that the best way to get over someone is to get under someone else.
|
|
Jan 14, 06
|
|||
|
|||
|
yo 'los, enjoy this time, to find whats true, or rediscover whats gold. Keep yo head up mate!
I havent been in a real intimate relationship since 98! And now when im at a age/point, where something meaningful on multiple levels is desired, im in a position where i would endager anyone i was with, or just simply be far too busy and distant. :( bah! Lonelyness is one damn hideous sweater id like to get rid of.
|
|
Jan 14, 06
|
||||
|
||||
|
Quote:
|
