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Nov 19, 04
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Girls who try to get up on my shit... fuck them.
So here's the deal... <<precursor, i can be jealous at times and i know this about myself, so i dont need to hear it again thanks.>>and i don't really know what i'm looking for in terms of advice im just really freaking frustrated with this chick and im about to just beat the living shit out of her, save for the one fact that it would cause SO much drama, and i try to stay out of that sorta thing...
so yeah... there's this chick DJ right? and i got with my man in july... <sidenote for background info) anyway, there have been incidences, previous to the one which i am going to discuss, where this girl has hit on or been trying to get up on my man. the first problem is, that they both play for one of the same production companies, so they are in the same crew. also, they have known eachother for a couple years, through the scene and so they are friends. now in the past i have just not said anything about this, because i trust my man and i know that he would never do something close to cheating on me. however, girls are scandelous bitches (some-- not all of course) and this girl, the more and more i see her, the more i think that of her... anyway, so there were 2 parties last weekend, one where my man was spinning (the hyve) and one where i was having my art shown (resurgzence). my man was supposed to meet me at resurgzence around 12 after he was done spinning, so i wait around, kick it, and he's not showing up. i figure something important musta come up and so im liek whatever u kno, shit happens, and i go out to this chicks car to burn a few. i come back inside and realize that its like 1:30. I am looking all around and can't see him anywhere, getting discouraged, i go to sit down on this bench and look up at the bar (its a loft over half the dancefloor downstairs so u can see ppl up there) <and of course i can't go into the bar because im not 21> anway so i look up there and i see the hoe bitch HANGING ALL OVER my man. and he is just sitting there drinking his drink chatting... im like OKAY whatever. he sees me and starts walking down, she hella stops him and is talking to him about something all giggly and touching him and stuff, u kno ur average semi-drunk flirtatious girl I GUESS. and he comes down and sits next to me. and im like "I don't like the stupid whore bitches hanging all over you" and he;s liek "what did u just say?" im like "nothing" then he repeats what i said, obviously he heard me, and hes like "oh, dude, its nothing, thats jus <insert ho bitch name here> she's jus drunk and like that." im like "no, its not nothing, and i dont like it." he's like "okay. I'm sorry, its okay..." so i just sorta got quiet for a while... Found out that he was late cuz he had ta play on the radio, which is fine, and he had come in a while before, and i wasnt there <smoking in car> so really i dont know how long he was up there in the bar drinking with her, or how long she was trying to get up on him... i talked to him later in the night, still bothered by it, and i was like "you know, i would not and have never let ANY guy touch me or hang on me." and he's like "well its different with guys" im like "no its not." he's like "okay i guess next time i wont let it happen" im like okay whatever. i dont even know what to say to that, its like he is trying to tell me he didn't know how to stop her from touching him in the first place... which is bullshit.. its like "hey i have a girl, and i don't think she'd be down with this" how hard is that to say? and its really frustrating me because she acts like i dont even exhist, she says hello all sweet to him right in front of me, and totally ignores me. the first time i met her i was standing right next to him, and he had his arm around me and she comes up, takes him, and hugs him all -not liek friends hug- stylz, and im left standing there, and she doesnt even fucking introduce herself. i know she has wanted him in the past, so what's different now? now im here. so WTF. And the thing is, i know that my man and i are going to be seeing her in the near future, for some parties that they are both playing, and i just know some shit is going to happen liek this again, and i just cant fucking deal with it anymore. i dont want some stupid bitch trying to take my man, regaurdless of whether or not he would go. because i know that he wont. even though i know this, it still really hurt me to see her all leaning on him and giggling, like that up in the bar. i dont know why it bothers me so much but it does. maybe im just totally over reacting i dont know, all i know is how i feel, and thats hurt and angry. hurt because he let it go down. angry because i want to deck that whore. why does she have to pick MY MAN to get on... why cant she just leave him the fuck alone. i have a feeling that when we see her im going to wanna say something, or just fucking clock her in the face. the problem is, as im sure its the same in van, that there is mad drama and politics in the scene, and it would totally make shit hit the fan. i just know there'd be mad threads about it on our seattle board, and people would be talking, cuz my man is well known, and i am pretty well known, and this bitch is sorta well known, so people would mad talk about it.. which i dont want to have to deal with... basically i dont know what to do. i feel like crying. or beating the shit out of her. 
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Nov 19, 04
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if you hit her or anything like that then martin is just going to see a side of you that he doesnt like. dont let that happen, it will only make her look good and you bad. trust me i am the queen b of jealousy and i know the results of acting like it.
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Nov 19, 04
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yeah i spose, im just so frustrated its hard to handle... if something happens again, i can't just sit and let it happen, i'm at least going to talk to her, but i don't even know what i would say.
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Nov 19, 04
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Nov 19, 04
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Well I don't know what to say. First of all I would talk to your b/f and let him know how you feel and then he should stop allowing her to be flirtacious with him unless he likes it. The introducing thing......well technically since the b/f was the mutual entity it woul dbe his resposability to introduce the two of you to each other. As for her....well I hate to break it to you but when a girl sees something they want it's very hard to change their minds. I would try an dbecome friends with her......keep your friends close and your enemys closer!
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Nov 19, 04
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well i agree dont hit her or anythning your bf wont like that
but i would have a few words with her tell her you dont like what shes doing and it seems scandelous and to stop dunt go all crazy like fuck you you whore leave my fucken bf and get your own tramp i dunt think hed like to hear that say it as nice as you can but be straight up YOUR bf not hers
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Nov 19, 04
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make her jealous that you have him... and she doesnt... its simple as that...
DONT get upset... it looks ugly (for him) as for her hitting on him and he not doing anything... he's a really nice guy... and i have been in his shoes quite a few times where no... i dont push the other person away... no i dont really say anything... i dont want to be rude and say "listen... get away... your annoying... your hitting on me... and i have a girlfriend" sure its something you have to do... to stop it... but its never good... pushing someone away... does he have any intent on "getting with her" or anything... no... not unless you panic... and freak... and then he might have an urge... (its weird how it works) dont worry... thats the key... just love your man. word to the ashizzlemyster.
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Nov 19, 04
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Shitty I kind of know how that feels. I had a girl following one of my ex's around for a couple months. She would pull shit telling my friends that she actualy slept at his house. It was frustrating, but I knew it wasn't true because she was a pathalogical lier. She would make up crazy shit all the time. And he had one of those moms that would freek if a girl slept over night.
But she was one of those girls that was only interested in guys if they were already spoken for. It was a big rush for her or something. Drove me up the wall. I still want to clock her sometimes, for trying to pull that shit, even though she didn't get anywhere. It's disrespectfull. But as long as you trust your bf then you should be ok. But I know that it can be hard with someone like that, trying to push you out of the picture. Maybe your bf doesn't know how to handle her, since he probably doesn't want to bring out any drama either, since they work together. Maybe he is just trying to not make things hard for himself. Does she seem like the type to badmouth someone if she can't get her way? I'm sure your bf doesn't want a bad rep within the scene. But yah maybe just talk to him about it. Don't call her a hoe or a bitch. Try to be the mature one and he will respect you more over her. Don't give her anything she can work with against you. Just tell him that it bothers you to see her acting like that. And also watching him allow it to happen. And if he could reasure you, by just asking her politely to not get so close to him. And remind her constantly that he has a girl friend that he respects. If you punch her, or bad mouth her, she can turn you into the bitch. Just play it cool, and keep the talking between you and your bf, because he is the one that counts. She obviously knows what she is doing is not ok, if she is clearly brushing you off, and looking right at you when she it flirting with him. You can talk to her, but if she has already made up her mind then it will just come down to your boyfriends decision. She may not respect you. But your boyfriend needs to show that he does by not letting this go any further. I'm not saying don't let them be friends. But if he wants to stay with you, I think he needs to lay down the law if this continues. Last edited by Kandyapple; Nov 19, 04 at 04:24 AM.
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Nov 19, 04
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but dont be too... agressive and angry... just be like "i dont appretiate you hitting on my boyfriend after everyshow" done and done.
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Nov 19, 04
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whatever about the introductions, my man did introduce me later.. all i know is when i meet dudes girlfriends that i havent before i make a point to be nice to them and say hello.
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Nov 19, 04
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you shoulda went to the bar, asked for am empty beer bottle. Broke it on her face. then stabbed her with the broken piece (on the face)!!
and if you still had energy, stab your man for standing this chik. and then the bartender.. so he doesn't call the cops. then hold the bottle up for the people sitting around, and ask for their wallets. then run!
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Nov 19, 04
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Nov 19, 04
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With all drama and gossip it eventually dies down with time and the rise for new drama occurs. I don't think you should be worried about what others might say in your reaction to her.
However, I think that your boyfriend might know her a bit better and understands the novelty and "innocence" of her behavior. However, sometimes guys can just be ignorant to the fact that a girl is hitting on them. Maybe take the time to get to know the girl, really know her and it might give some validity to your assumptions or it might completely change your mind. Right now, that's all they really are, just assumptions without any solid evidence. When you drown yourself in these consistent assumptions, you lose sight of reality. I know it's tough seeing some "slutwhorefacecunt" hanging off someone you really care about. If you have come to the conclusion that she is indeed doing this on purpose, there are ways to let her know that such displays of affection are not neccessary anymore: - flick her arm off of him everytime she tries to hang off of him - maybe put your arm around him the same time she does, and give him a hug = wouldn't that be awkward for her?? She'll probably take her arm off... or hug him as well. - inform her, "I know you are probably lonely, and need a hug, I could give you one instead of having you hang off of MY bf" - just start being super nice to her, she might find it harder to "stab your back" then - tell her how much you care about him, tell her that you admire that her and your bf are such good FRIENDS, and keep pushing the point that they are FRIENDS to her: "How long have you guys been FRIENDS? How did you guys first become FRIENDS?" etc. Well, that's all I got really. Best of luck.
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Nov 19, 04
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those are some good ideas girl, thanks again.
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Nov 19, 04
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you end up with the ho with stitches. your man with a lil scar that reminds him who's the boss. AND you walk our rich!! like, YA?!
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Nov 19, 04
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Yo Ashes i get the same way... i would have reacted the same way you did, and i get hard to handel when im frustrated aswell. i dont think id hit her, but id definitly say somthin. have u met her before? or do u both just know who eachother are?... cuz when u see her next and ur with ur boy u should just step infront of him, put ur hand out and say "hey im ashley, sonny's GIRLFRIEND"... see what happends. or if u already know eachother step infront of him still and be like "HEY!<enter stupid bitches name here>, whats up how are you doing? its sooooooo good to see you!" and give her a huge hug and pick her up off the ground like your all excited and happy... that should drive her nuts!!!...
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Nov 19, 04
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Yea what Bri said! Those kinda girls are so dumb, obviously not alot of confidence if shes hanging off of someone else's boy..But ya, just do what Bri said & kill her with kindness, then she knows where you stand & you're still being civil!! haha..she'll eventually get the hint & step off...If your boyfriend is flirting back, then there is a prob, nobody deserves that shiat :)
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Nov 19, 04
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Nov 19, 04
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I have been in your shoes. I would say my greatest flaw in a relationship is that I can get posessive, because what is mine is mine for fucksakes! It seems like the issue here is nothing to do with you not trusting your man, but it's the fact that this girl seems to have no respect for you, let alone the fact that he even has a girlfriend. That would really piss me off.
I would probably send all the death glares I could in this situation, those usually get the message across.
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Nov 19, 04
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Ashlee how old is this chick? cuz it seems to me that she thinks ur sum young girl that doesnt have a clue, I think she thinks that cuz ur young martin will want someone older more mature with more life experience, I dunno do u get that? i know Martins a good guy but why the hell was he letting some chick hang off him knowing that u were sumwhere in the near vacinity or even at all? whats up with that ash?
Last edited by ~*tct*~; Nov 19, 04 at 05:50 AM.
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