the confession thread

[automatic]

Originally Posted by Angel

Forgive me Automatic for i have sinned, it has been almost 20 years since my last confession. I once became so upset at someone that i bought a cheap lipstick and wrote painful words on their vehicle window for revenge.
Please allow me to finally be forgiven.

you are forgiven. you must buy a mars bar and leave it on a strangers windshield in a suburban neighbourhood, along with an unsigned brief note detailing why it was left there.

[miss.myra]

Forgive me lord for I have sinned, it's been 4 hours since my last confession. I said many many bad words at an automated telephone system. I know it can't hear me, but it felt good.

pls forgive me thx.

[trance4life]

i confess i have been to a rave

[Veni*C]

forgive me for i have sinned, i once threw my roomates toothbrush in the toliet because she was being a total bitch... i felt really good after i did it.
(she totally deserved it though)

[crookedking]

if people actually follow through with their confessions that'd be awesome.

[revocrednu]

Forgive me lord Automatic for i have sinned.Everynight,I smoke a huge joint with my roomies before going to sleep, so the next morning, i am struggling to make it to school. Please can i be forgiven.

[veN]

Originally Posted by crookedking

if people actually follow through with their confessions that'd be awesome.

I think you mean to say, if people follow through with their penance. Bc yeah, that would be cool.

[crookedking]

Originally Posted by Nev

I think you mean to say, if people follow through with their penance. Bc yeah, that would be cool.

uummm. no.

[interloper]

Forgive me Heathen Kings of old for I have sinned. I was born human, flawed, with no destiny other than death, with no chance for ascension. Forever will I be bound to the abyss due to my composition. My thoughts may be eternal, but forever will my body be bound to the bitterness of mortality.


-Preet

[automatic]

Originally Posted by miss.myra

Forgive me lord for I have sinned, it's been 4 hours since my last confession. I said many many bad words at an automated telephone system. I know it can't hear me, but it felt good.

pls forgive me thx.

you are forgiven, as your penance you must call phone #s randomly until you get an answering machine (just say oops sorry wrong number if you get a live oen), and then you must leave a nice message on a strangers answering machine.

[automatic]

Originally Posted by trance4life

i confess i have been to a rave

you are forgiven....as penance you must dress up like a candy raver, and stand on a busy corner for five minutes sucking on a soother

just to give people the idea of how ridiculous it looks in the light of day

[automatic]

Originally Posted by ~Veni_C~

forgive me for i have sinned, i once threw my roomates toothbrush in the toliet because she was being a total bitch... i felt really good after i did it.
(she totally deserved it though)

you are forgiven. as your penance you must sleep next to a frozen turkey for a night

[automatic]

Originally Posted by revocrednu

Forgive me lord Automatic for i have sinned.Everynight,I smoke a huge joint with my roomies before going to sleep, so the next morning, i am struggling to make it to school. Please can i be forgiven.

you are forgiven. as your penance you have detention for one week, stay after last class in the library for 15 minutes every day and read quietly.

[automatic]

I'm changing the rules to make the game more fun....

so....not only do you have to do a penance, but to earn the forgiveness of fnk you must also post a pic if you can, but only if you actually do the penance, so no faking it by taking a picture and not actually doing it.....f'r instance, if myra's penance for leaing a nasty phone message is to leave a nice phone message (along the lines of "hey, you don't know me, but i'm just phoning to wish you a happy day, so happy happy and may all your dreams come true), then she must post a pic of her hand holding a phone, but only if she actually does it.

best picture will win a fabulous PRIZE

[thebobman]

ooh LOW-DA!
I have SIN-DA!

I have quoted shows that have fallen out of popularity for my own amusement when I knew that it irritated the people I have with. MY MOST HEINIOUS SIN IT WAS-AH!

[automatic]

Originally Posted by thebobman

ooh LOW-DA!
I have SIN-DA!

I have quoted shows that have fallen out of popularity for my own amusement when I knew that it irritated the people I have with. MY MOST HEINIOUS SIN IT WAS-AH!

HEINOUSNESS! you are forgiven, for your penance you must bake cookies and give it to those who you inflicted this upon the most.

[decypher]

I confess that although i promised to keep the bud smoking to the weekend it hasen't worked at all. Alcohol levels are still running pretty high.

[DiamondDash2k]

forgive me lord for i have spread all the common stds to every man, woman and dog alive, then i ate the dog and one time i peed on a glass door and a guy inside saw me do it, ran to the door and started screaming stuff at me, so i ran with my pants falling down in new west near the nudie bar paramount. im glad my not so huge erection went away.

[automatic]

Originally Posted by decypher

I confess that although i promised to keep the bud smoking to the weekend it hasen't worked at all. Alcohol levels are still running pretty high."

you are forgiven, as your penance you must toke on an oregano joint, and you must drink a super SUPER spicy virgin caesar.

[automatic]

Originally Posted by DiamondDash2k

forgive me lord for i have spread all the common stds to every man, woman and dog alive, then i ate the dog and one time i peed on a glass door and a guy inside saw me do it, ran to the door and started screaming stuff at me, so i ran with my pants falling down in new west near the nudie bar paramount. im glad my not so huge erection went away.

you only get forgiveness for stuff you actually do, i'll believe it when i see the pics, and this is the last time i respond to a made up sin in this thread.

[Only_Glory]

forgive me lord, for i love madonna :(

[automatic]

Originally Posted by Only_Glory

forgive me lord, for i love madonna :(

YUMMY MOMMY!

you are forgiven, next time you answer the phone you must speak in a bad fake british accent until someone asks you what the fuck you are doing....even if it goes on for weeks.

[esoter1c]

Forgive Me Lord For I Have Sinned: I Curse God Evry Minute Of My Existence For Casting Me Down From Heaven Onto This Miserable Plane Of Suffering Inhabited By The Lowliest Of 3rd Dimension Dwellers..damn You God You Lice Infested Syphillis Sucking Dog !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
One Day I Will Ascend Back To The Most High And Defecate Upon His Face !!

[Varney Rae]

Forgive me Automatic for I have sinned. I have purposly seduced my ex boyfriend in order to break him and his girlfriend up, and succeeded. I have also engaged in intercourse on my parents bed. That one has been bothering me for too long awhile now, please do forgive me.

Oh and I sometimes like to put on one of the old spicegirl cds and dance around to it when Im getting ready to go out. ugh.

[automatic]

Originally Posted by varn

Forgive me Automatic for I have sinned. I have purposly seduced my ex boyfriend in order to break him and his girlfriend up, and succeeded. I have also engaged in intercourse on my parents bed. That one has been bothering me for too long awhile now, please do forgive me.

Oh and I sometimes like to put on one of the old spicegirl cds and dance around to it when Im getting ready to go out. ugh.

you are forgiven. sins of the heart are always the saddest. as your penance you must do a couple of things....

you must give away and umbrella to a homeless person downtown and make your way home in the rain. you must coook dinner for your folks. and you must stay home and drink a bottle of wine listening to a massive attack album, preferably protection.